Surgery Notes - August 2002

Sir, It seems a long time ago that I added some sanity to balance your ravings, but in my defence I have had a busy summer. However I am now ready and willing to add some clarity to the confusion that surrounds you. 1. Engerland Have you ever been to an England game? If you haven't my advice would be don't fucking bother. I went to the World Cup game in Sapporo against Argentina and left the ground vowing never to watch the cunts again (Engerland not the argies). What turned me off ? Aside from the Sheffield Wednesday brass band, who are a bunch of tuneless northern monkeys, I had to endure the elation of my fellow supporters at the appearance of Teddy Sheringham ! Never in my short life have I been so moved to random violence. 2. Keano Nice to see the Keane brothers doing what they do best - Roy raving and ranting at Norwegians and offering everybody outside to the car park, while Robbie adds another shit club to his already impressive list (Coventry, Inter, Leeds and now Spurs). There is nowhere left for the fucker to go - my advice to him would be to pack it all in and open a fun pub in Salt Hill. 3. Boring start ? Priesty has gone too far this time, labelling Chelsea's unbeaten opening as boring. Was he watching the same matches? Zenden's rocket against Utd ? Sir William of Gallas netting after 3 minutes ? Zola from 40 yards ? Goal machine Frank Lampard ? Boring, my arse ! All this after the Premier League conspired to offer us the most difficult opening programme of the lot. Well it didn't stop us. 4. He won't let it lie What is wrong with South American has-been Gustavo P ? I read his predictions for this season, where he reckons that Spurs will finish above mid-table Chelsea ! I suspect that Gustavo has been at the home-brew mescaline again. We'll be running round Tottenham with our willies hanging out, We'll be running round Tottenham with our willies hanging out, singing.. 5. A moment's silence for the events of last September A year ago the world was shocked to the core. Life will never be the same again, at least not for the Americans. World Trade Center ? No mate, the appalling willies out, dancing on tables, singing and puking antics of John, Jody, Frank and Eidur. Is it already one year on ? 6. Reasons to be Cheerful x 10 Doing Charlton at the death Gianfranco, 36 going on 17. John Terry is innocent Frank Lampard, Goal machine Patrick's early bath Utd 0, Bolton 1 Jimmy & Eidur - waiting for the dam to burst Leon Knight - Gianfranco's prodigy Sir Ken Bates - "fuck 'em all" attitude Roy Keane - a one man circus You see my point ? Dr Les. Oh I do, Les. Nice to have you back. Priesty.

© 2002 Priesty's Chelsea FC Refuge.