Top Ten Other Ways To Forfeit A Baseball Game
From the Home Office in Grand Rapids, Michigan, it's the Top Ten List for August 11, 1995

10. Have stadium announcer start "outing" players
9. From blimp high above field, drop Babe Ruth onto pitcher's mound
8. Players blood-alcohol level higher than their on-base percentage
7. Catcher fails to pass local emission standards
6. Fans get to third base with players' wives, if you know what I mean
5. Being caught wearing the still experimental "Wondercup"
4. Have Dick Assman do all the pitching (roll VT of Dick throwing lame pitch)
3. New ball girl? Divine Brown
2. Ask announcer to introduce you as "The Unabatter"
1. Three words: Bloody Glove Day