(From my Football page)

20th September (2000)

GOD BLESS PATRIK!

one of my other 8!

So, why do you think I like this swarthy, silken-haired beauty that is Patrik Berger then??? No, no, no - wrong! :) Remember I sent Patrik a get well soon card?? Well, he didn't exactly sign my guestbook (yet!) as requested, but I never asked for an autograph or anything at all - and yet, Patrik must've known I was feeling glum, glum, glum - for today, popped through my letter-box an "all about Liverpool" magazine and an A4 sheet of headed paper with his blessed autograph on it (it's the 9th one I have!). He may well have even written the envelope!!! Forget that the mag is from season 1999/2000 and that I am an Evertonian, the man is an out and out gem! *many, many kisses*!! AND, Patrik gets back to playing ways tonight as he is ready to face Bradford in a reserve game! Read about Patrik's delight on here! Pata is very happy about this, and I am happy for him!! Thank you so much and GOOD LUCK with that knee!

Hey! I was pretty delighted, eh? Quite excited - very grateful!! And I'm a (partly) grown woman!! Imagine how happy a child would be! It grieves me this, it really does. It grieves me that I have to use PB as an example - but it has to be done!

During my lunch-time, I sat down and had a little look at the (old) magazine I had received. Hello!! In the centre, there were photos of all the players with their autographs. Thus:

Can anybody spot the difference between this "printed" autograph and the one I received on the sheet of A4 paper (right, much reduced)??

Well, what to say?? I am CROSS! I HATE it when this happens - and it's happened before! I'm not totally blaming Patrik, as he must have heaps of mail - or even Liverpool, who are looking out for their players - but this is out and out DECEIT boys! PLEASE don't do it!! It would be much, much preferable to not send anything - really! It bothers me little, as I already have EIGHT Patrik autographs; all different, all kosher - one I even accidentally bled onto (cut myself on the glass I was framing the picture under!) and the ink ran! But what if this was a kid?? All excited about getting *the* Patrik Berger's autograph? Carried it around, showed it to his mates, hung it in a gold frame on his bedroom wall - all the time thinking it the real thing (for sure it looks it) - yuck, it's really not nice!

This happens people! Look carefully at any autographs you might have had sent to you! I had my first example of this "phenonomen" some years back, when I wrote to Eric Cantona (for pities sake; for my son; for my son!!!!!) Stamped card back in less than no time. I tried again; sending my own picture this time. They stamped that too!! I wrote a very scathing letter to Alex Ferguson. I never had a reply (he is the only manager, by the way, who has not replied to one of my scathing letters!) Now then, much as I hate to suggest this, Manchester United are not bad at replying to their mail. In fact, they are excellent - Mark Hughes, Jordi Cruyff, Roy Keane (twice), Jaap Stam, OG Solskjaer, Andrei Kanchelskis - the list goes on - oh, yes - even David Beckham and Ryan Giggs (some are mine; some my son's!). This, then was just one of those players (Cantona in this instance) who got too much mail and didn't intend to answer it. Best not to answer at all, Monsieur Cantona than to try that one on people!!

The last example of this practice I had was a good 'un! Chelsea!! Again, Chelsea are EXCELLENT at replying to their mails. I have so many, I've lost count - including a couple from Gianfranco Zola. Last Christmas, I wrote to Franco, enclosing a Christmas card. I asked that he sign this for a friend of mine. In no time at all, I had the card returned and a picture - both with IDENTICAL stamped autographs on! Incensed, I sent the both back (for attention Gianluca Vialli) with an outraged letter, stating, amongst other things, that my friend was not stupid (well . . . :)) and would not have been duped by this. I didn't ask for a replacement - but I got one!! A few days later, with a "Compliments from Chelsea FC", I received a "properly" autographed photo of Gianfranco + a Christmas card, also properly signed! THANK YOU CHELSEA! This was a very nice thing to do and I (and my friend, perhaps!) were very grateful. I couldn't help smiling to myself though, at the thought of Zola being called into the office!!!!!!! :)

Well, I thoroughly loathe this, as already stated. I understand that some players get heaps and heaps of mail - but really and truly, it is better not to answer it at all, than to attempt to deceive people. Anyway, how come some can manage it?? David Ginola. Now then, he gets a lot of stick for thinking a lot of himself (and why shouldn't he??) - but he answers every single one of his letters (of which there are sackfuls daily) - even if no stamped-addressed-envelope is provided, he provides his own stamp. That man knows how to repay his fans for their unstinted support. And there are others. Alessandro Del Piero; Roberto Baggio; Alan Shearer; Fabio Cannavaro - and on and on and on. Don't tell me that these players don't get heaps of mail? Course they do - but they don't stoop to trying to pine off their fans with fakes!!

Footballers throughout the universe! Please - DON'T DO THIS!!! Follow the example set by Dennis Bergkamp - and never reply to any of your mail. It's preferable! Phew! End of the sermon for today!

Oh though, but no, I won't be writing to Liverpool to complain! I have had a couple set-to's with Liverpool before - and they always came up smelling of roses! The complaint, many years ago, after we were rudely chucked out of Anfield as "trespassers" when the darned gates were open - was dealt with by "when you are next in Liverpool, drop me a line and we will give you a tour of the ground". And, the complaint that not one single Liverpool player seemed to ever reply to his mail (barring Patrik!) was dealt with by sending me a fully signed poster of ALL the players!! Ay, ay, ay . . . .