Ben's Memories of Jack

By Benny Elias from "In A League of Their Own"
It's a pretty well known fact that Jimmy Jack is careful with his money.
I'll never forget the time we were on an end-of-season trip to Hawaii and four of us got into a mystery shout at the hotel cocktail lounge.
There was me,Paul Sironen,David Brookes and Jimmy,and we're all bringing back some deadly concoctions.It was coming to about 30 bucks a shout and, as usual,Jimmy's the last one to go to the bar. When he came back he had a carafe of house white and four glasses.
Still,Jimmy is a great bloke and a terrific footballer.After the 1989 Grand Final,when we were beaten in extra time,we were absolutely shattered, but we made a pact to stick together.We said we'd be a team for as long as it took us to win the premiership,and it started that night:no-one walked out.
That set the scene for a pretty big night.We went back to the club and the wives and girlfriends headed off about 2am.Not us,we kicked on to the Cross and finally got back to the club for breakfast about 8am.
As soon as we arrived the doorman grabbed Jimmy.
"Mate," he said,"your wife has been ringing every half hour for about the last six hours.You've got to ring her."
We all thought something terrible must have happened to one of the kids or something,and Jimmy's gone as white as a ghost.
"Quick Benny," he said, "give me 30 cents."
He's gone to the phone and rung her and we could hear every word from 20 metres away.She's given him an absolute spray.
It's "Where the hell have you been?How dare you head off all night and leave me while you get drunk with your mates.Now you get home right this second.."
Jimmy's just standing there holding the phone and the boys are laughing their heads off.He's started out the door and I've grabbed him.
"Come on Jimmy," I said,"are you going to let her talk to you like that? Geez Jimmy,we've made a pact to stick together.You can't leave now.Who wears the pants in your house anyway?Who's the one who brings home the money? Who's the one who gets kicked in the head ever week,who's the one who has to get up to training every night,who's the one who had to tackle those big forwards when they break through the line?Now you get back on that phone and let her know who's boss."
"You're right," he says,"give me another 30 cents." Back he goes to the phone.
"Donna," he says,"just who do you think you are talking to me like that? Who's the one who gets kicked in the head every week?Who's the one who brings home the money and tackles those big forwards when they break through the line? Now you get back in that kitchen and I'll be home when I'm good and ready."
He turns around to us and we're all cheering as he slams the phone down. And the 30 cents drops out the bottom.He's been talking to a dial tone.
"I couldn't do it Benny,"he said,and caught the first cab home.