EXCELLENT CAREER CHOICE




[ Learn From Others | How You Can Be Reported ]

So you want to be a troll, eh? You find that normal life bores you and you must find something better to do. Play sports? No. Find a hobby? No. Become a troll? That's it! Well, if you have nothing better to do than roam around the internet 15 hours a day looking for feedback forms with which to play, you've come to the right place. But before you get started, you'll need to know what you're getting into.

So you think you're an expert. You're very experienced in this field. You've flamed dozens of webmasters using their forms and you're still going. Now, you're ready for revenge. You're mad at the Knicks for beating your team. So go flame some Knicks fans! You'll never get caught, after all, you're using forms. Nobody can track you! You're tired of all those warnings telling you that you'll be reported to your ISP. You know they're just bluffing because they're scared of you. But be sure to make fun of every aspect of the site, the team, and the city (New York happens to be too rainy)! If you're new at this, you may want to take a look at a few flames some of us Knicks site webmasters have gotten to learn the tricks of the trade, or, if you're a pro, maybe you could learn something new. Here's one I got the other day:

Sent from Mail Form posted at:   http://www.oocities.org/Colosseum/Stadium/1069/feedback.html

(subject)  Knicks Central Feedback
(name)  YUM YUM
(resolution)  Please Select One
(Colors)  Please Select One
(browser)  Please Select One
(Comments)  THE KNICKS HAVEN'T WON SHIT.THERE TEAM IS OLD AND THEY PLAY LIKE HORSE SHIT. THE ONLY THING WORSE THAN THAT TEAM ARE THE LOSER FANS LIKE YOUALL WHO SUPPORT THAT PATHETIC ORGANIZATION,AND THAT HELL HOLE OF A CITY THAT THIRE FROM...
(Submit)  Submit

Remote IP: 209.7.120.100

Notice the superb spelling and grammar that show even the most educated people can become trolls. Now, this guy is obviously an experienced troll. You have to compare the Knicks to something crappy and insult their age. He did, however, leave out a comment about JVG's hair. Notice the dissing of NYC. It's a HELL HOLE. Not bad, but it could use some improvement. Next example.

Sent from Mail Form posted at:   http://www.oocities.org/Colosseum/Stadium/1069/feedback.html

(subject)  Knicks Central Feedback
(name)  Chris
(email)  ********@AOL.com
(found page with)  It SUCKS!!
(resolution)  Not Sure
(Colors)  32-bit (Millions)
(browser)  Netscape 4.x
(like to see more of)  Less Knickerbonkers
(Comments)  I HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKSI HATE THE! KNICKSI HATE THE KNICKS.....(you get the picture)
(Submit)  Submit

Remote IP: 152.163.207.136

Now this is obviously an amateur. How did he find the page? IT SUCKS! Not very original. And in the comments section, his insults were very under control, and contained no profanity. Notice how he filled in the rest of the survey, such as colors, his browser, etc. A definite no-no. You don't want to make me think for a second that you're serious when you're trying to flame me. His e-mail address is bleeped out, so as to avoid harassment. However, never put your own e-mail address. Always put someone else's, so that I'll actually be tricked into thinking the person who is flaming me actually gave me his address. Alright, one more example.

Sent from Mail Form posted at: http://www.oocities.org/Colosseum/Field/1098/frames.html

(your name)  Ben Dover
(Do you want to join the mailing list?)  No, don't sign me up.(choose 1)
(where do you live?)  USA
(next-url)  http://www.oocities.org/Colosseum/Field/1098/frames.html
(your age is)  Older than the above(choose 1)
(What do you rate this page?)  1 Lowest
(your favorite sport)  other(choose 1)
(Comments)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
fuck you
I dont give a crap,dont try to threaten me because I know your survey
cnat track me, so fuck you
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Remote IP: 207.79.35.227

This was not received from my site, but from a friend's site. In my opinion, this person is very unsure of himself. He only typed out the form to try to convince himself that he couldn't be tracked. We'll get to that. Also, look at his name. Ben Dover. A classic. How do these people come up with this stuff? On lesson you can learn from this troll is that you should never leave out that extra "FUCK YOU."

OK, now that you have an idea how to troll with feedback forms, let's get an idea of what can happen to you. Nothing you say? Well, let's look it over. You may not have gotten reported so far, but due to the large number of flames recently received by Knicks site webmasters, we are reporting them all. So, if you still think I'm bluffing, read on.

Each time you sign on to your ISP, you get something called an IP address. This is a series of number separated by dots. It is different each time you sign on, and no two people ever have the same IP address. An example of an IP address is 207.79.35.227. When you send an e-mail, or use a feedback form, your IP address is recorded. Take a look at some of the examples above. The Remote IP field is your IP address. Here is the procedure I follow if I get a flame.

I go to DOS prompt. I type "tracert," followed by a space and the IP address. I press enter. From the data given to me, I can determine which domain you're on. For example, AOL.com. Try this with any IP address above while you're online if you use a PC. Then, I prepare a message to abuse@yourisp.com. This is usually the address that your ISP uses to handle abuse of Internet accounts. In it, I include a brief statement about what you did, as well as the trace I just performed. I also include the message sent to me, as well as the headers in the message. The headers are like an electronic fingerprint. They are generated by the program that is invoked when you press the submit button. The headers include the time the message was sent. Then I send the message to your ISP.

Now, the abuse department of your ISP has an IP address and time that someone abused their account. All they have to do is look up which member was online with that IP address at that time in their logs. If they feel that you were doing something which you shouldn't have been, they may terminate your account, and depending upon which ISP you use, you may never be able to get an account with them again.

If you still think that this is a bluff, please feel free to flame me. Just get ready for your service cancelled message, it should only take a few hours to arrive.

For more information on how to troll, check out the new ASBPNYK Troll Relations Unit.

[ Back To Knicks Central ]