This is rapidly becoming the official site of the most unofficial clan there is - the clan MacClown.

Instigated by folks from Guelph, ON, and joined by weirdos from across the province, the MacClowns have been bringing their drunken kilted brand of scruffiness to Renaissance Faires and Highland Games (not to mention weddings, Christmas parties, and any other excuse we can think of to throw on a kilt and get pissed) for the last four years. Some would argue earlier than that, but Lady Jo didn't get us all suited up until the summer of 2002, so bite me! There are about 35 of us now, and not a one that you'd leave alone with your silver, your booze, or your daughter.

There are those that would ask: what the hell is it you folks do? Nothing, really, except spread mayhem, destruction and dubious personal hygiene (anyone had their kilt cleaned more than once in the last four years? anyone?) everywhere we tread. Recent accomplishments for the clan include getting free passes for the whole lot of us to the Real Mckenzies show in Toronto in 2003, being part of the now-defunct Ontario Renaissance Festival's 2004 ad campaign, getting a small write-up in the Wellington Advertiser in 2004, being photo mugged by the Chieftain's wife and son at the Fergus Highland Games (as well as everyone else) in 2005, and initiating diplomatic relations with the Tijuana Bibles over some of the best scotch we've been privy to.

There is also an annual Toga Party staged at the Punk Rawk Palace, home of myself and the Clan Berserker, during which we usually ditch our skirts for bedsheets, then our bedsheets for the pool. If that's not enough to make you reach for the brain floss, then you were probably there.

While we're on the whole a completely disreputable bunch, we seem to be well received wherever we go (best example: the inaugural day of the Royal Abingdon Renaissance Faire was practically dedicated to us), assuming someone sits on Rainey's lap to keep his kilt down. We don't charge a damn thing for our services (at least, not after the fiasco of someone believing we actually charged a pint per photo), and we tend to leave a trail of money in our wake, to offset the bad smell.

Membership is pretty exclusive, and a member was nearly excommunicated for crimes against MacClownity, so don't try to find us: if you're in a pub, anywhere in Southern Ontario, we'll probably find you.

I've just added a message board, as detailed to many clan members at Abingdon this past weekend (Aug. 28th). Feel free to post a message!

Sooner or later i'll put up some photos, and maybe a membership roll, and i think i actually scanned the clan tartan for our wedding invitations, so maybe that too. In the meantime, i'm working on getting us tshirts with the clan crest and motto: "us, and those like us". If it doesn't happen quickly enough for you, do it yourself!

Cheers!

-Mistress K of Os
Clan Assault Wench