Exhausted by time consuming schedules and life enslaving gadgets, thousands of fitness weary Canadians today publicly abandoned their equipment and routines, opting instead for mega meal deals and honking super sized fries at fast food eateries across the country. When questioned by reporters about the sudden unexpected shift in health attitudes, one annoyed woman snorted, "Ah, shut up and eat something!" Gym operators and fitness centre owners are calling for a federal inquiry into the phenomenon.