Story #2: SUN, MOON AND STARS

by Shalee

Day 20

 

The place had the look of a refugee camp, almost. The settlement of Starfleet emergency shelters was beginning to be mixed with crudely wrought, yet, precisely built permanent buildings. A village was starting to take shape. In the midst of it all, a solitary figure stood watching the bustle.

 

Kathryn Janeway smiled wanly as a crew member greeted her in passing. She couldn't understand how easily everyone seemed to take their situation in stride, that is, except her. Her heart just wasn't in this. Yet, she still found herself marveling at the couples that seemed to making themselves apparent and wondering just how long these relationships had been going on. Torres and Paris were, of course, a gimme, Kathryn known about them, but when had Neelix and Sam Wildman gone beyond just being friends? Then there was the Doctor and Seven, who seemed more than just physician and patient.

 

And lastly, herself and Chakotay – did they really finally have a chance? Or had she put things off for too long. Could one kiss be the beginnings of something new and wonderful? Perhaps, only the gods of fate knew the answer, for Kathryn was much too tired to think anymore.

 

Turning from the scene spread out before, Janeway began to walk up the slope, toward the plain, where the shadowed hulk of 'Voyager' lay broken and alone. She had only gone a few steps when a voice stopped her.

 

"Captain, do you have minute?"

 

Janeway turned to see Harry Kim standing there, "Of course, Harry, what's up?"

 

"I'd like to see if I can convert 'Voyager's' deflector dish into solar energy collector. It could provide us with a nearly unlimited power source."

 

Janeway stared at the young man as she run a hand over her face and into her hair, absenting repositioning the gray headband holding it back from her face. It matched the dark gray suspendered jumpsuit that she, like everyone else had taken to was wearing with a lighter gray mock turtleneck. No uniforms anymore, no ranks or departments. After a moment, she sighed and nodded, "Okay Harry, do it."

 

Kim flashed her a bright smile and a salute, "Yes, ma'am… "

 

Janeway smiled a little as he retreated back toward the settlement, presumably to let B'Elanna and Seven in on the news. With one more lingering glance, she resumed her walk, falling into an almost leisurely gait as she lost herself in thought.

 

~*~

 

The Settlement's unanimously appointed architect, Chakotay, looked up from the table, where new building designs were spread out as Harry Kim entered the shelter looking for Torres.

 

"Hey, Harry, what's up?"

 

"The Captain gave the okay. Have you seen B'Elanna?"

 

"Whoa, the okay, for what?"

 

"The defector conversion." Kim clarified.

 

" Right, I get it," Chakotay replied with a nod. "I think, I saw Torres headed toward the river with Paris."

 

"Great! Thanks, Commander--" Kim answered and turned to leave.

 

Chakotay stopped him with a question. "Harry, just where did you see the captain?"

 

"On Paris Ridge, I think, she was headed to Voyager," Kim supplied giving the other man a curious look.

 

"Good, thanks. I've got something I want her to see," Chakotay said as he rolled up one of the thin sheets of plastics and tucked in under his arm to follow Kim out. They parted outside and the older man headed up the long hill dubbed Paris Ridge and out onto the sandy plain.

 

~*~

 

The sun was slipping down casting a maroon aura across the golden sand. Perched on a rock, Kathryn Janeway sighed softly as she watched the sinking shadows play across 'Voyager's' gleaming white hull. Even in her crippled state, the starship still looked majestic. Kathryn pulled her knees up and hugged them tightly as a single tear slipped silently down her cheek.

 

A short distance away, Chakotay stood observing the woman her had grown to respect and love over the past four years. Yes, she drove him crazy sometimes but the little things she did, always made him forgive her in the end. Like now, as he watched the fading sun turn her tawny hair into a burning halo. The forlorn expression on her face only emphasized her innate vulnerability. Kathryn Janeway was strong woman in most cases; but, by the look on her face, she appeared to be losing an inner battle.

 

Following his heart instead of his head, Chakotay stepped closer and put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

 

"Kathryn… "

 

"Son of a… " Janeway swore as she jumped from the rock. "Gods, Chakotay, what the hell are you trying to do give me a heart attack?" she rambled accusingly.

 

"Sorry… " The big man murmured as he tried to read her expression.

 

"Dammit… " Janeway huffed as she removed her headband and drew her hands through tousled hair in an attempt to regain her composure. Freed of its normal confines today, the riotous mass red-gold flowed over her shoulders like shroud. Finally, she looked at Chakotay with wry smile curving her lips as she sat back down. "You know, I might have to put a bell on you."

 

"I truly didn't mean to startle you, Kathryn."

 

"I know, I'm sorry, I bit your head off."

 

"Hey, what am I here for but then to keep my captain from doing just that to someone else," Chakotay proclaimed as he sat down next to her on the rock.

 

"Have I really been that bad?"

 

"No, actually I've been worried about you. You've been so distant and quiet."

 

Janeway lowered her gaze to the ground, "I know, it's hard to know what to say sometimes."

 

"Yeah, tell me about it."

 

They were both silent for moment, then Janeway gestured to the rolled plastic under Chakotay's arm.

 

"So, what do you have there?"

 

"Um, just a little drawing." Chakotay told her a bit lamely.

 

Janeway cocked her head slightly as she looked at him, "So, do I get to see it?"

 

"Well, I had thought to show it to you but… "

"But now you've changed your mind."

 

"No. Yes, I don't really think… "

 

"Come'on, bud, fork it over," Janeway ordered in her best captain's voice. Seeing as he wasn't going to get away with NOT showing it to her, he passed it into her hands.

 

"Okay, but just remember you wanted to see it."

 

"What? Is it really that bad?" Janeway began as she unrolled the sheet and then she saw what it was and her voice trailed off. "Chakotay, I… "

 

"It's just a sketch, there's a long way to go yet," the dark man blazed onward, not noticing the expression on Janeway's face. "Of course, it bigger than the one I planned for New Earth. We have an ocean to explore, not just a river. So, I've added two cabins and galley, we'll have all the comforts… "

 

"Chakotay, please stop… " Janeway extolled suddenly as she backed away shaking her head. "I can't. I'm not ready for this. It's a wonderful gesture, but it's just too soon."

 

Chakotay stopped and stared at her, "Kathryn, I know that, I just thought I could share some plans for the future."

 

"Future. I can't even think about tomorrow."

 

As much as he wanted to argue, Chakotay knew it would only get more hurtful. He sighed, "Alright, I won't bring it up any again."

 

Janeway nodded knowing the effort he was making, "Thank you, Chakotay," she handed the drawing back to him. After an awkward moment she spoke again, "I'm heading back to camp. You coming?"

 

He watched her start back down the hill, and shook his head slowly. "No, I think I'll stay here for a while."

 

"I'll see you later." She replied with wave and was gone.

 

His gaze followed the slight woman until she disappeared from sight. Leaning on the rock, Chakotay whispered into the wind, "One of these days, Kathryn. One of these days, maybe, I'll get through to you."

 

~*~

 

Day 25

 

Night had fallen on 'Voyager's' new home. 'That's what it was now.' Kathryn Janeway reminded herself. The once mighty starship that had carried them, nurtured and sustained them was now nothing more than salvage. It was being taken apart piece by piece, bit by bit, conduit by cable to be used in building their home. But with each piece, bit and conduit ripped from 'Voyager', a little more was torn from Kathryn's heart.

Unable to return to a sleep that was tortured by the dreams, Kathryn sighed and rose from her bed. Pulling a blanket around her shoulders, she stepped out of her shelter into the night.

 

Amid the myriad of similar structures spread out before her, covering the floor of the valley, lights flickered intermittently within some as their occupants moved within. Walking quickly away from the buildings, Kathryn made her way up a small hill to what had become her favorite place on this new world. Leaning back against the gnarled trunk of the ancient tree, Kathryn tried to focus her wandering mind. But remnants of her dream kept churning…

 

'Captain, I can't hold her. We're going down.'

 

'Janeway to all personal. Brace for impact!'

 

Kathryn shook herself, putting her knees tightly to her chest. Rocking slightly, she closed her eyes to block out sounds and images. Lost in her turmoil, she didn't hear the footfalls approaching.

 

"Kathryn… "

 

"Gods, Chakotay, would you stop doing that," Kathryn admonished as she felt him sit down next to her.

 

"Sorry, but I was worried about you. I saw you walk this way."

 

"I'm fine," Kathryn whispered her thoughts turning again inward.

 

"Kathryn, don't do that."

 

"What?"

 

Chakotay sighed; he knew this wasn't going to be easy. But he was damn tired of her distancing herself. Both from the crew . . . and from him, he thought they had gotten past that. So, he tried a different tact. 

 

"You know, 'fine' is such a contrite little word. It can mean many different things. None of which would describe you."

 

"Really… " Kathryn returned icily as she rose and walked a short distance from him. "Have I been THAT transparent?"

 

"Only to me . . . and maybe Tuvok."

 

"I see… " Kathryn murmured still refusing to look at him. "Well, maybe I get need more time."

 

"Time for what, Kathryn? It's been three weeks. Voyager isn't going anywhere." Chakotay told her quietly as he came to stand before her.

 

"My god, Chakotay," the small yet formidable woman exploded, "don't you think I know that? Just where the hell do you get off saying that to me?"

 

"Look, I'm sorry, I know this is hard for you."

 

"You don't know a damned thing. You don't know how hard it is to watch all hope of getting home… just die. Day by day, piece by piece, as parts are put to supposedly better use. Voyager is dead. She died for us." Kathryn whispered as her voice broke and she dropped her face into her hands.

 

"Would you rather have it other way around?" Chakotay asked quietly.

 

Slowly, Kathryn raised her eyes to meet his. They seemed to shine, reflecting unshed tears. After a moment she murmured, "No, of course not. Chakotay, I'm sorry… "

 

"It's okay," Chakotay told her gently as he stepped closer, "but you need let it go. Voyager has made the ultimate of sacrifices; please don't lessen her gift of life by not accepting it. Think of her as an organ donor. With everything she gives, she gives us new hope and a better chance to live. Please Kathryn; let her go."

 

The former captain of the Starship Voyager released a shaky sigh as she thought for a moment then slowly nodded. At the same time, a small crooked smile formed on her face. "New Hope," she whispered as she placed a hand on Chakotay's chest.

 

He placed his own hand atop hers and returned her smile, "Sounds good to me," he told her while gently lifting the small hand under his, to place a kiss on the palm. Kathryn shuddered at the sensation of warm lips on her cool skin.

 

Gently, she pulled her hand from his grasp, to gather herself as she spoke. "New Hope is the perfect name for our new home; do you think everyone else would agree?"

 

"There's a saying my people have, 'From the stars and the sun and the moon should man learn'."

 

"And that means… "

 

"We've traveled through the stars, we've basked under countless suns and we contemplated many a moon. Each has its once story, just waiting to be told. And now it's time to listen."

 

Slowly, he held out his arms and after a moment's hesitation, Kathryn moved into his comforting embrace.

 

After a moment, she asked, "Do you still have that boat design?"

 

"Sure do," Chakotay whispered, his warm breath caressing her hair.

 

"Good," Kathryn murmured back as they stayed there holding each other for a long time, returning to the settlement just before dawn to begin a new day under the sun, the moon and the stars.