The
THE HELMSMAN'S APPRENTICE
or
YOU WANT SLASH? ... YOU GOT IT


A Little Tale by Evil Janeway



Tom Paris--or, more accurately, the demon planet clone of Tom Paris--awoke and stretched his limbs. It was an action borne of the original Tom Paris' habit, and the new version of the man performed it perfunctorily while at the same time enjoying the sensation of muscle fibers stretching and receiving an increased blood flow. He rolled to his knees, and then climbed to his feet.

The others were still asleep. He looked around at the group of new bodies that surrounded him in various states of repose, and settled on one face in particular. Harry Kim stirred and sighed in his sleep, and the sight of his face and slightly parted lips set off a stream of physiological reactions in Tom's body.

Tom glanced down at the protrusion below the waist of his replicated Starfleet jumpsuit and knew instinctively that it was not likely to subside of its own accord. He also was familiar with the original Tom's morning ritual, designed to deal with this all-too-frequent problem. Glancing around the landscape, he furtively moved away and headed downhill from the bluff top the group had been sleeping on.

He found the perfect spot under an overhang in the outcropped rock. Settling into the alcove, he leaned back against the warm red rock and unseamed his uniform. The heat from the rock spread across his back and into his muscles, mirroring the heat that was building in his crotch. He slid his hand down his stomach, gripped his now fully-erect member, and slowly began to stroke it. As his other hand stroked his balls, he found himself fixated on the image of Harry's sweet face. Pumping himself faster, he pictured Harry's full, parted lips as he slept, and then he pictured those lips sliding over him. Tom's head rolled side to side, and through his half closed eyes he saw a gleam off to the side of his alcove. It was a puddle of gray goo. A puddle of nice, warm, wet goo, Tom thought. Oh, yesssssssssss...

Tom crawled over to the puddle and knelt over it. Resuming his stroke, he once again summoned the image of Harry lying beneath him, Harry's lips wrapped around his cock. Just before he exploded, he firmly circled the base of his rod with his forefinger and thumb and gripped his balls with his remaining three fingers. He thrust himself into the warm goo and added to its volume with a groan as he massaged himself.

He pulled out of the puddle, red-faced and panting, and sat back on his heels. Blowing out a breath, he rested for a moment and glanced down at himself. His hand still gripped his softening member, and both were still covered with the gray goo.

"Great," he muttered. He hadn't thought about bringing something along to clean up with. He reached for a long, flat rock with his left hand to scrape the goo from his right, although he didn't relish the thought of applying the rough material to his more delicate anatomy. But as he lifted his right hand from his crotch, the gray goo slid off of him and onto the ground of its own accord, forming a small gray puddle next to the larger one Tom had enjoyed. Frowning, he squatted down and peered at himself. He was completely clean.

A sudden movement he caught out of the corner of his eye brought his head up with a jerk. Had another early riser come looking for him and stumbled upon the scene? Tom jumped to his feet and fumbled with his fly, and froze. Where the smaller puddle had been now stood an erect penis encircled by a hand. The thumb and forefinger of the hand formed a collar around its base, and it stood proudly on the remaining three fingers of the hand, which appeared to be draped over a pair of testicles.

All of which appeared to be a perfect replica of Tom's own hand and naughty bits.

"Oh, my God," he stammered to no one in particular. "The puddle of gray goo..."

The unit on the ground thrust twice into the air and let loose with a spurt of white. Instead of becoming flaccid, however, it remained erect and pulsating. It took a tentative step forward on its fingers towards Tom, who recoiled. The unit turned away from him and started away at a brisk trot. Up the hill. Towards the group.

"No! Wait!" Tom yelled, and took off after the renegade penis.

It scrambled up the side of the bluff with Tom in hot pursuit. Tom slowed as he approached the area where the group was sleeping and attempted to move as silently as possible. Poking his head around a rock, he was horrified to see the runaway rod stepping gingerly among the sleeping forms of his crewmates.

The unit suddenly stopped short and twitched its head inquisitively, as if it were sniffing the air. Then it wheeled around, made a beeline for Harry Kim, and started thrusting against Harry's buttocks. Harry stirred but did not awaken, although a slight bulge began to assert itself in his pants.

Cursing under his breath, Tom moved towards them as quickly and quietly as he could. Harry rolled onto his back, and Tom reached him just in time to snatch the clone from his chest before it could plunge itself into Harry's lolling mouth. The penis struggled, but Tom managed to wrestle it away from Harry and hustle it to the edge of the bluff. As he held it, the unit began to thrust against his hands, and he found himself becoming aroused in spite of himself.

Tom tentatively lowered the unit and held it near his own crotch. I wonder what it would do if...

The thought was cut off by another spasm and spurt from the unit in his hands. He grimaced and held it at arm's length.

"Okay, big guy," he said, "This is getting too weird. Sorry."

And with that he held the penis on the ground and attempted to smash it with a rock. Slippery with semen, it managed to squirm from his grasp, and Tom's rock came down on his own hand instead. The slippery unit took off at a gallop down the hill. Tom cursed and heaved a boulder after it; his efforts were rewarded by a very wet and satisfying *splort* as the unit was crushed in a splatter of hundreds of droplets of gray goo.

"Heh."

Tom trotted down the hill back to his alcove. It would be nice, he thought, to sit back against that rock and soak up the warm sun and the invigorating ammonia atmosphere. He chuckled as he passed some of the droplets of goo that resulted from squashing the erstwhile penis.

He glanced back over his shoulder at them, and the smile disappeared from his face. The individual goo drops were shimmering, vibrating, and stretching up. As Tom watched in disbelief, a finger appeared here, a glans there, and soon every drop of goo that had been splattered out of the penis had reformed itself into a new, perfectly replicated unit.

The hundred new handfuls began gamboling about in the dust, playfully thrusting at each other and spurting into the air. Most searched out the puddles of gray goo that were scattered across the landscape at the base of the bluff and began banging away at them. Within minutes, the valley was teeming with phalluses on the run.

Tom attempted to herd them away from the slope, but they swarmed over him and streamed up the hillside. He watched them go, kicking away a few straggling dingers that thrust timidly against his ankles. "No sense is putting off the inevitable," he muttered to himself, and trudged up the hill. There was going to be a lot of explaining to do.

"It was cold and I thought total immersion in grey goo would warm it up... nah, that won't work. I was taking a leak and passed out, and when I woke up I was face down in a puddle of goo... no, that's no good. Um... I was walking and my pants fell open and I tripped over a rock and... Damn!" Was he going to just have to tell the truth? To the captain? Or was she really the captain any more? Come to think of it, who was he, really? Who were any of these people? He had reached the top of the hill and sagged against a rock formation, overwhelmed by the existential questions that were now pouring into his mind. Utterly defeated, he rounded the rocks with his head hanging low, resigned to his fate.

And stopped dead in his tracks.

Before him stretched a tableau that defied his wildest imagination. And that imagination was more than lively. His fellow crew members were islands in a sea of replicated Paris meat, some reclining, some standing, some squatting, all with dazed expressions. Very happy dazed expressions. Tuvok stroked one Tom salami while two more nuzzled his ears. Several penises danced in a circle around B'Elanna Torres, who was doing a handstand--a handstand?--with a dinger in each orifice. Neelix walked past with three in his mouth and another massaging his scalp.

Tom had just started towards a mound of rods under which he thought he could faintly discern the outlines of the Delaney sisters when he noticed Harry Kim off to the side, writhing under the attentions of one enormous phallus.

"Whoa, Harry!" Tom said in amazement. "Where the hell did that come from?"

Harry managed to focus his eyes briefly on Tom before they rolled back into his head. "Mmm... you just [gasp] smash a couple of them together and they get bigger ummmmmm..."

"Bigger? BIGGER?!? Harry, each of the fingers on that thing is as big as my original whap! Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Ohhhhhhhhhhh yeah, I'm sure... Whooooooaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh..."

Boy, is the wizard gonna be pissed when he gets back and sees this... Tom thought to himself as he tore his clothes off and entered into the fray. ...so I hope he's gone a goooooooood [moan] looooooong [oh yes!] time...



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