~*~ (Spoiler: This is a post-script piece to the fourth season episode, “Hunters”, in which Voyager receives mail from home, including a ‘Dear Janeway’ letter to the captain from Mark.) ~*~ Janeway and Chakotay walked into the mess hall, her arm still linked through his, her fingers lightly clasping the top of his hand. The tone of the room was one of mixed emotions, although it was obvious that euphoria had the upper hand. Voices and glasses were raised, with words and liquids competing for the attention of the mouths of Voyager's crew. The two senior officers stopped as they entered, surveying their gathered family. Neelix, true to his word, was spreading joy in the form of food and libation as quickly as he could. Several of the crew had joined in helping him, impatient in getting the party to a full tilt as quickly as possible. In the background, barely audible strains of music struggled to be heard. A few of the younger people were dancing in the far left part of the room, where they had pushed back interfering tables and chairs; the movements of their carefree bodies mimicked the inhibition of their spirits, knowing that they were not forgotten. The biggest smiles and most shining eyes belonged to those who had received heartwarming letters from family and friends who vowed not to rest until Voyager's return. Others were smiling, but without the spark of their more fortunate shipmates. They had to be content to imagine that somewhere, along the disrupted array, were the remains of messages for them, too. The hope of that possibility, of the dreams of what such letters held, gave them the ability to join in the celebration. Neelix suddenly was in front of the captain and first officer, winking at them as he handed them each glasses of what he stated was ‘the real thing’, a pale beige liquid full of bubbles and effervescence. "I've been saving this for you," he stated in a tone as sparkling as the liquid. "Thank you, Neelix," said Janeway as she accepted his offering. Smiling at her, Chakotay silently took his glass, his expression full of secret anticipation. Neelix proffered a spoon to her. "Captain, I think a few words are in order, don't you?" he prompted her. She grinned at him, with her look thanking him for his ever-diplomatic thoughts. She followed through on his not-so-subtle hint, and as she firmly hit her glass with the metal utensil he had given her, producing its expected attention-getting effect. The raucous room suddenly fell quiet, as all eyes turned to their captain. "My fellow Voyagers," she began, her voice strong and positive, "today we have tangible proof that we are not forgotten in our journey the Delta Quadrant. Many of you have received messages from friends and..." she paused... a slight crack the only evidence that the next words were going to be difficult,"...and loved ones. Be assured that they have shared with others the truth that we are very much alive and well. Although the link has been lost..." she paused, searching for just the right words, "... we will make every effort to reestablish contact, so that we may find all of the other messages that remain. In the meantime, there is a lengthy communiqué‚ from Starfleet which we will be decoding, and hopefully with those words, we will find ourselves closer to... home." She again hesitated momentarily, her eyes briefly looking downward, as if to summon an inward strength, and then quickly gazed into the deep dark pools of Chakotay's comforting eyes. "For some of us, the news has not been what we expected, but we rejoice with the hope that our lives may someday soon rejoin those of our families and friends, and that we may resume our lives with them in the Alpha Quadrant. Here's to that day... and to the valiant people of this indomitable ship... here's to Voyager and her crew!" She raised her glass high, and the rest of the room did likewise. Shouts of "Here, here" rang out; cries of thanks to Janeway and others for seeing them thorough thus far... mumbled prayers in remembrance of those who were now gone from them... the soft ’ssss’ sound of Kes' name (and her ‘gift’ to them) being remembered. The musical sound of glasses hitting one another in a cacophony of toasts. One hundred and forty some odd beings, survivors in a strange universe, struggling to remain united and confident in the face of insurmountable odds – quixotic and determined. Once more Janeway and Chakotay looked at each other. The experience of four years of having worked side by side allowed them the luxury of being able to speak to each other silently, their eyes alone relaying their communication. They each started walking to different sections of the room, concerned senior officers interested in talking with their crew in more private conversations, offering their support in whatever way they could. Each knew the importance of this valuable time, to further strengthen the ties that bound this wayfaring group... this band of survivors... this team of incomparable valor. ~*~ Two hours passed. The crew were beginning to come off of their adrenaline highs, and the reality of duty once more called them. Some wandered off to posts deserted for the impromptu party; others moved towards quarters where sleep was needed before they relieved their colleagues. Neelix and his staff gathered up the remains of the celebration and took them to the recyclers. The captain and her first officer once more stood together in the center of the room, cheerfully bidding good-byes to the departing stragglers. Soon, it was only them, Neelix and a couple of diligent crewman scurrying about who remained in the deafeningly quiet room. The captain made her way over to the ever-ebullient Talaxian. "Neelix, as always, you have managed perfect timing with your social gathering. Thank you for being so cognizant of the needs of the crew. I'm afraid I was rather negligent in acknowledging their need for such a celebration." The small man took her hands between his thick, hairy ones. "Captain, I think that you, above all, needed to have this release. Although I don't know what your letter contained, it has been evident that the news was not pleasant. Perhaps there are other messages to you that will rectify the situation." Her eyes became glazed with a thin film of tears, her forced crooked grin failing to hide her inward sorrow. "Thank you, Neelix. I appreciate your concern. My news was not unexpected, but a shock, nonetheless." She took a deep breath, and straightened her shoulders. "However," and her smile assumed a hint of hope, "perhaps the contents of that letter will allow me a new freedom." Her face turned from that of her Delta Quadrant friend to that of Chakotay. His somber appearance brightened, as his dimples deepened; her eyes were firmly locked onto his. "Perhaps we must allow certain windows to be closed in order for us to appreciate what we have around us." The wise Talaxian comprehended what he saw before him, and discreetly started to take his leave. "I'm sure you are correct, Captain. Sometimes we don't recognize the treasures that have been around us all along." He winked at the couple as he scurried off, humming an odd melody under his breath. The clean-up crew had now dimmed the lights in the now-empty room. Kathryn Janeway let out a sigh. "We really should be getting back to our posts; after all, it’s only 1400." Chakotay looked down on the petite woman. "You're the captain," he said, his eyes glimmering with a mischief that she knew was ultimately going to be her downfall. "But don't you think you deserve an afternoon off?" He decided to continue on his roll. "Don't you think I do, too?" "Do you have something in mind, Commander?" she hesitatingly asked. He knew how vulnerable she was right now, and that he shouldn't push too hard. "Oh... I don't know. We could call up your Lake George program and go out in a boat for awhile." Her eyes lit up. "Now that's a wonderful idea, Chakotay. Yes, let's play ‘hooky’ for the afternoon. I'm sure that Tuvok and Tom can handle anything right now." She leaned into him in a conspiratory fashion, and quickly sought a change of subject. "Can you believe that Tuvok is a grandfather? Why, I think I saw him almost smile when he told me his news!" Chakotay laughed. "He's about ready to burst through his uniform; tradition is very important to him as a Vulcan." He quickly felt her mood turn somber. "Kathryn, if you feel uncomfortable about this, you're allowed to renege." "No, I mean it. This is the best thing for me to do. And you are the one for me to be with right now. There is no one else on board who can begin to understand how I feel..." He glanced around them, and seeing no one, he gently took her by the shoulders and pulled her close. Even though her body was tense next to his, he whispered into her soft hair, "Thank you, Kathryn." The warmth and comfort of his body soothed her, and in spite of herself, she felt her nerve-tensed muscles begin to relax. He just felt... so good! As she was about to succumb to the overwhelming comfort of his embrace, she summoned up the realization that she had to turn over the bridge. She reticently pulled away, and hit her comm badge. "Captain to Tuvok. Commander, you have the bridge. Commander Chakotay and I..." she paused and looked at him. "...have some business to which we must attend. Contact me only in an emergency." Chakotay silently laughed at his conspiring superior. Would Tuvok 'buy' that story? "Let's go," he said, as he gently pushed her towards the door of the mess hall. ~*~ The program that had last been called up over a year ago was as inviting as it had been before. Set at the height of a spring afternoon in upstate New York on Earth, the air was light and bright and full of the anticipation of the season. The deep blue waters were crystal clear, narrow and deep. A weathered rowboat, with two oars, was pulled up on the shallow beach. "Just as we left it," she announced. The couple had stopped by their quarters and changed from their constricting uniforms into clothing more apropos to an afternoon on the lake. "I'll race you to the water," she yelled, as she took off with girlish glee. His more solid body took off after hers, his speed quickly overtaking her. His weight threw him off-balance as he reached out towards her. Just as he grabbed for her swiveling body, he fell, taking both of them down into the shifting sand beneath their feet. They rolled, laughing and giggling in their stolen freedom from duty. For several moments, their laughter continued, signaling a release from the tension of so many weeks and months. As their motion reached a state of equilibrium, they found themselves on their sides, locked tightly in each other’s arms. Suddenly realizing the state in which they found themselves, they embarrassingly broke their contact and hurriedly sat up. "Well, that was a surprise," Kathryn said, brushing the sand off of her arms and legs. "But I do feel a lot better," she smiled. He hurriedly got up and offered her his hand, pulling her to a standing position. "I think you slowed down on purpose," he smiled at her. "But I still fell," she laughed. "Yes, you did. But, this time" he paused, looking deeply into her eyes. “This time you fell without a safety net." His eyes conveyed a deeper meaning than his words expressed. "Perhaps," she said, taking a deep breath and breaking their mesmerizing eye contact. She quickly turned and walked over to the boat, grabbing ahold of its rough-hewn sides, its grayish- green paint peeling. "Now – I wonder who's going to handle the oars?" He laughed. "I rowed last time; it's your turn!" Kathryn pushed up the sleeves of her tunic. "All right. But, just remember, if we capsize, this time the captain does not go down with the ship; it's women and children first!" She was laughing as she climbed over the hull and positioned herself in the helm. Chakotay pushed the boat into the azure waters before hopping into the seat in the stern of the boat. Kathryn faced him, her arms flexing with the maneuvering to get the boat away from the shore. Chakotay was leaning forward, grinning at her efforts. "It takes a little more energy than ordering ‘full impulse’ on a starship, doesn't it?" he grinned. She leered back at him. "Maybe. But I have a lot more control here!" They were silent as she took them out from the shore. The clear air was brisk with the sweet scents of spring. The echoes of birds sang in an antiphon from either shore. With the combination of the invigorating surroundings and the physical exertion, Kathryn became more relaxed than she had been in weeks. "There's a little island about a mile downstream that I saw last time. Let's go see what it has to offer," Chakotay suggested. "Sounds good to me," was Janeway's response, her arms now in a rhythm that was moving them along at a smooth, steady pace. Chakotay leaned back onto the stern of the boat, welcoming the warmth of the holographic sunshine. Kathryn silently took them towards their destination. About twenty minutes later, the long island came into view. "Land ho, Captain," said Chakotay, sitting up and shifting the rudder. Kathryn turned around, and saw the longitudinal form off to the port bow. "All right," she said with excitement in her voice. "Let's see what this place has to offer." She steered the small vessel onto the sand bar extending from the island. Chakotay hopped out, and pulled the bow up onto the land. She pulled the oars inside the boat, locking them into position, and then took his outstretched hand. "Shall we do some exploring?" he smiled at her. "My pleasure," she answered back, keeping her hand in the comforting confines of his. They walked along the beach of the narrow island. A few trees arose form the center of the land; but most of the small island away from the beach was covered with a down of tender young grass and Virginia bluebells, enjoying their brief season in the sun. Kathryn reached down and picked up a small shell. "Why, this is a shell of an apple snail. I haven't seen one since before the Academy. Look!" she picked up the convoluted shell, and showed him the intricate markings on the brownish-pink shell. He looked at her, mesmerized by her interest. Even now, in down time, she was intrigued with the fascinating world around her. Her features softened as she became entranced in her discovery. She slowly turned the carbonate case over in her hands, enjoying it for its beauty as well as it scientific representation. "Kathryn," he said softly. She looked up at him, her eyes torn between the innocent thrill of the shell and the tempestuous yearning that she had been harboring for so long. "Yes?" she asked, her heart now beating in a rhythm that she had only known before in her subconscious. He took her face between his hands and lowered his to hers. His eyes closed, as their message quickly moved to his lips. She did not move, petrified at what she knew was coming. She was falling – and there was no net. But, she was not afraid. She knew that he would break her fall, and that she would survive. Their lips met, welcoming each other as long-lost friends, comforting and warm in their recognition of each other. His hands swiftly moved lower, embracing her shoulders. She responded by pulling him closer to her, willing his body to encompass hers. His warmth encircled her... filled her. Their entwined bodies lowered themselves in tandem to the grass-covered surface at their feet. Hands, which before had shied away from each other, now reached out in a freedom that they had never known. He once more traced the contours of her face, marveling now at the softness of her skin, reading volumes in the fine lines that carved their stories in her countenance and drowning in the waters of her liquid eyes. She raised her hands to the jet-black threads of his hair, pulling it aside and noting the gray that had appeared over the last four years. How much of that gray was due to Voyager – and how much of it was because of her? She closed her eyes, thinking with horror at the times that they had been at odds about decisions – how his support was always there, no matter how strongly the words reverberated, even when he had disobeyed her. His mouth once more eagerly sought hers, finding her as hungry as he was. A brief thought flickered through his mind, as he was rapidly becoming lost in the need of several years; was this too soon? Was this just a rebound reaction to her news? Would she regret her actions? But her ravenous demands quickly erased his anxious questions. Instead, he found himself now starting a journey of her body with his impatient hands, wanting to travel roads that had so long been closed to him. Down her arms they went, stopping only long enough to tease the soft under flesh of her upper arms. Her head very slightly moved back with the sensation his fingers created. Her lips opened to the gentle urging of his tongue, allowing them to taste the salty sweetness of each other's mouths, exploring the moist warmth of their inner selves. Each of them offered groaning sighs of appreciation for the newfound sensations. Finally, gasping for breath to control the escalating emotions, they broke apart. Chakotay finally summoned the energy to speak. "Kathryn – this is too fast. You may be rushing... we may doing something that..." She would not let him finish. "Chakotay, I know now that I was hiding under a facade. For so long, I used Mark as a shield against what I knew was true. Now, I have nothing left to protect me from what has been inside me for so long. I know now that our places are meant to be together, both in command and in our hearts. Earlier, we both agreed that there is plenty of time. But there has also been too much time lost – so much time to make up for, to live for. My only regret is in waiting so long to admit this to you." His answer to her was the brightness of his smile, which quickly buried itself once more on her lips, and began a frenzied trip around her face… her neck... her shoulders... wanting to taste ever more of her. Her desires matched his, and together they reached out and pulled the encasing cloth of their tunics over their heads. The ‘sunshine’ warmed their now-bare upper bodies, glistening with a patina of kindled emotions. Hands and lips flip-flopped in trading places as they continued to cradle and consume flesh and souls. Before either of them realized it, there was nothing between them but the fine down of their exposed bodies and their defenseless passions. A warning light blinked on in the back of Kathryn's mind, not about what was happening to them, but as a reminder to struggle to call out, "Privacy lock," to the unseeing womb of the holodeck. A barely audible ‘click’ assured them that their tumultuous actions would remain theirs alone. Not a move, not a nuance was missed in the progression of their slow dance of fulfillment. His hands had found the ready access of her desire; there was little need for him to further prepare her. Her long years of denial welcomed him with warmth and wetness. He sighed at the joy of her acceptance and readiness as he entered her... as she wound her legs around him and invited him to transport both of them to the far edges of their existence, beyond the confines of Voyager... of the Delta Quadrant... the galaxy... the universe. They both reached the outer limits of their beings within seconds of each other, crying out and transporting themselves into another reality, another cosmos. Time and space and being ceased to exist; only love and peace remained. She was the first to regain sensibility. She reached out to his perspiration-drenched face, which was lying, on her chest. She brushed back the thick dark hair clinging to his face, and, leaning down, kissed the top of his head and sighed with a satisfaction that she had long denied herself. "Why did I refuse to recognize this for so long? Every day, I have seen it in your face; with every argument, I have felt it in your concern." Chakotay stirred out of his grogginess, and languidly traced her lips with his right forefinger. "Because you feared a loss of yourself, my dear Kathryn. Only when you finally admitted that that loss would not be the end of your individuality would you understand. You will always be you, and I will always be me, but together we will be us. Just as the sun and rain work to bring forth productive life, so are we meant to be together to bring a new spirit to Voyager? This I firmly believe is our destiny." She smiled at his profoundly philosophical interpretation of their long-delayed union. "Or, it could be," she said as she pulled him close to her once more, "it's just because... we're good together!" His rich smile broke into a tender laugh, as they both felt their bodies again warming to each other. "That's what I've always loved about you, Kathryn... your ability to cut right to the heart of the matter." Their bodies rapidly ascended the emotional scale again. Messages from Earth were good, but the truth for them was here – for here, in a hologram of their imaginations and thousands of light years away from Earth, their souls had found the reality of their love. ~ THE END ~