If a sex manual was written the way IRS instructions are, nobody would ever get around to doing a thing!


Tax and Credits:

Instructions for Line 42: 

Credit for Consensual Sexual Activity.  Attach Form 397S if necessary...  ___

Note:  Only those activities performed more than the national average can be deducted.

Use worksheet on page 14 to determine the amount of your credit.

Consensual Sexual Activity Credit Worksheet

A.  Fair market value of activity...  ___

Note:  See chart on page 23.  If the activity is not listed or is illegal in your state or locality, enter 0.

Multiply the fair market value of each activity by the number of times performed in the tax year for which you are preparing this return.

1)  Coitis...  ___ x ___ = ___
2)  Fellatio...  ___ x ___ = ___
3)  Cunnilingus...  ___ x ___ = ___
4)  Masturbation...  ___ x ___  = ___
5)  Other...  ___ x ___ = ___

Add Lines 1 through 5 and enter the total on Line 6.

Total fair market value of activities...  ___

Note:  If more space is needed, attach Form 397S to the back of your return.

B.  Divide the amount on Line 6 by 7.0739...  ___

C.  Subtract Line B from Line 6...  ___

D.  Enter the amount from Line C on Line 42 of your tax return.  This is your total allowable Consensual Sexual Activity Credit.

If Line C is 0, enter the amount from chart (see left margin) on Line 27. This is your penalty on not taking care of yourself.  ;-)