***************************************

Nikki -- a light sleeper for years, due more to raising a little boy than to noble slaying duties -- would gather him close and whisper soothing things to him. He seemed to like that.

When sunlight seeped through the draped windows in someone else's home, and dawn couldn't be denied, it was Nikki who woke to find him studying her in a surprisingly non-creepy manner. She reached for him without thinking and they lay there for a long time, Spike occasionally rubbing his cheek across her hair and Nikki's hands drifting along his chest.

She sensed his smile above her. "Looking for weak spots?"

"Floating ribs," she answered. "One of my favorites."

"You know your bloody son stabbed me in the same place you did?"

She laughed. "No kidding? I love it."

"Yeah, figured you would."

A few more moments of silence as they tried to stave off the coming day. Then --

"Spike."

"Yeah?"

"I need you to do something for me."

She was learning the difference between his smiles and his smirks. "What do you have in mind?"

"Probably not the same thing you do. But you have to promise. Promise me you'll do this, no matter what."

He sat up, regarding her curiously. "You know I'm yours."

Oh, she knew. And they'd come far enough, together, that she could ask this of him and hurt for him even as she did. But it was necessary, sensible and Nikki was nothing if not a relentless pragmatist.

"The First isn't done with me. It's got its claws in but good and it's not ready to let go yet. I'm quite the prize."

"No argument here."

"If it happens again -- when it happens again -- I need you to finish me, Spike. Go in fast and hard and don't leave anything to chance. You understand? I need you to kill me before I kill somebody else."

He went rigid in her arms and she knew what was coming before he spoke.

"You're insane. Not going to do any such thing so you can just put it out of your head."

"Don't leave it to Robin. He'd do it if he had to but I don't want him to live with that."

"Nobody is going to do anything, hear me? That's the whole point. To keep you safe, not take you down if you start getting a bit twitchy."

"It's more than that and you know it. I'm dangerous; I'm a threat to those girls. To your girls -- Buffy and Dawn. Anybody who gets in the way of what the First has planned."

"Giles is working on --"

She shook her head, not angry but not budging either. "Giles doesn't have the time or resources to fix me, Spike. I'm not even sure it can be done. You give me the benefit of the doubt, you could very well condemn all of us."

He shot up from the bed. "No! This is -- no! You weren't brought back just so --"

"But I was, Spike. By the First, remember?"

He started pacing. Nikki recalled him doing the same thing when she wouldn't take blood from him. Seemed like years ago. She didn't doubt his sincerity, accepted that his consternation was real. Maybe that was what they had gotten out of this whole bizarre situation: forgiveness, friendship (more) despite the machinations of the First. Shouldn't that be enough?

"I'm asking this...as a favor. I don't want to go to Buffy, don't want to be put down by another Slayer. But I will if I have to and Spike? She won't say no."

He inhaled sharply, which Nikki found interesting. She would have liked a bit more time to puzzle over this vampire.

"I am here," he said slowly, "to protect you. Knew it as soon as I saw you, that night. Have to keep you safe."

Nikki was becoming exasperated. She was hardly a damsel in distress. Well, anymore. Lately. "And I appreciate the sentiment but it's misplaced. I'm a warrior just like you. My strength is tremendous and I can do a hell of a lot of damage -- to you, to the people you love! Do you not see that?"

"Bollocks," he hissed. "I'll send you away from here if I have to but I won't --"

She stood up from the bed. "Send me away?" she asked incredulously. "Did you actually just say that?"

"Fucking right I did."

"You're the one who's insane!" she shouted. "I never told you to protect me. And if I had wanted some -- some sexy vampire bodyguard I would have picked Blacula!"

"Well, you ended up with me and I won't let you do this."

Spike and smug, dictatorial pronouncements were apparently an incendiary mix because the next thing Nikki knew she had swung and connected, hitting his face with a solid and satisfying thwack.

"Ready for a rematch?" she taunted.

"You broke my nose, you bitch."

"Well?"

He glared and wiped blood from his lip. "Think this round will end any different?"

This time, when she aimed a roundhouse kick to his sternum he anticipated it. She found herself flat on her back, Spike above her all fanged out. An elbow jab at his throat sent him sprawling.

"You wouldn't pull this shit with Buffy," she accused him as they circled each other. "You know better. So why me?"

He laughed unpleasantly and upended the fussy dressing table that separated them. "Funny you should mention her. She can tell you that this noble martyr crap? Not all it's cracked up to be, pet. Can get downright ugly."

She shook her head. "I don't plan on coming back this time."

He grunted and backhanded her. "Sounds like you got this all worked out."

"I like to plan for any eventuality. This isn't a discussion, Spike. Deal with it or walk."

She was kneeling above him now, a leg broken off the little table pressed firmly to his breast. She didn't know how long they were poised like that but finally, finally his shoulders slumped, the tension leaving his body, the fight going out of him. And oh, how she hated to see that.

"Don't do this to me," he said. "I watched Buffy die...you can't imagine. Don't make me go through it again."

She slid off him and sat on the floor. Lifted his head carefully until it rested in the vee of her crossed legs, and then stroked the mussed curls back from his face while he looked up at her.

"Hey," she replied. "Nothing's for certain yet. Could be the First skips me entirely, goes straight to the main event. But Spike -- you knew what you were getting into, hanging out with Slayers. You knew the score. It's too late to change the rules now."

He sighed, buried his face against her still-bare skin. "Always did have the worst luck with women."

An hour later they turned up at the house on Revello Drive.

In the kitchen, Buffy stood with her lips pursed and took in their appearance. Bruised and bloody, each of them, with the added air of Spike's slightly singed flesh and the indecipherable expression they both shared.

"Busy night?" she asked tartly, then held up a hand. "I don't want to know. Really. I just don't want to know." She turned to Nikki. "Robin is back at his place. Willow can give you a ride if you want but chances are he'll show up here soon enough. Spike, have Dawn clean you up; you smell a little well-done for my tastes. If you're really nice maybe she'll set your nose, too. And --"

She broke off at the sound of the doorbell. "How much do you want to betthat's not a Girl Scout with a backpack full of Thin Mints?"

Curious, Spike followed her to the entryway, where he found her stock-still before the open door.

"See?" she told him dully. "Not a Girl Scout."

Her visitor grinned. "No, but I can dress up like one if you want."

Buffy banged her head against the doorframe. "Hello, Faith."

Next: Trinity

| HOME | WHAT'S NEW | ABOUT | FANFICTION | BLOG | LINKS | VERBIS |