If I could be like.
Well I would give anything.
Just to live one day,
In those shoes
If I could be like that.
What would I do?


3 Doors Down --Be Like That.


"Tai! Pass me the ball!" shouted Daisuke. He was running inches ahead of his hero, and the game was almost over.

Tai looked over at Daisuke. He had an open passing opportunity, but decided to get the ball up the field, a few more meters.

Tai was in perfect scoring position now. He had faked the defense, and was about to kick the ball, for the perfect shot. It would sore over the goalie's head, and lodge itself in the left-hand pocket.

'Perfect.' Tai thought, as he swung his leg back for the shot. Suddenly, every muscle in his body gave out. He fell into a heap on the floor, not moving.

The ref blew his whistle, and signaled for the trainer to come onto the field. At once the crowds went wild, crying out foul! Some were even shouting red card.

Tai rolled over onto his side, wincing in pain. All his team mates rushed over to him, asking if he was okay. Oh course, Tai was in too much pain to notice.

'What's wrong with me?' he asked, as he was lifted onto a stretcher. There was an ambulance now entering the field, and his parents were rushing to him, very fast.

"Tai!" Daisuke shouted over the crowd. "Are you okay?"

Tai looked at him weakly, cringing as a rippling pain shot through his legs, entering his body. He squeezed his eyes shut, in an attempt to block some of the pain. He managed to nod feebly.

"Tai!" it was Mimi. She was running faster than she ever had in her entire life, just to get close to him. She had dropped her pom-poms long time ago, forgetting every single cheer. She had been forced to watch as her boyfriend had tumbled to ground, unmoving.

She was even more worried, because lately, he had been feeling a little sick. He had gone really pale, and was very weak. She had begged him not play soccer that night, but he refused flat out.

'I can't let the team down.' he told her. 'We tied this team. They're very vicious, and will be out for the win tonight!' she reminded herself of his words. 'Plus I'm team captain. How would it look if I wasn't there?' he said with his puppy dog eyes. 'And I'll get to see you in your hot cheerleader outfit.'

Night now, she had wished she had done something to get him to stay home. 'Please be all right.' she begged. 'Please.'

She arrived, just in time to see Tai being lifted into the ambulance. "Tai!" she cried out again.

This time he heard her, and he lobbed his head over to see her. He smiled faintly, as his giant brown eyes screamed for a cure to the pain.

She wanted to cry. "Tai." she whispered, as her best friend Emily came over to her, and helped her to the benches.

"Mimi, Tai's gonna be okay." she told her, as she brushed a piece of her dark brown hair from her eyes. "You know him. It's probably just stress."

"Stress my butt." she said, as took a sip of the water Emily had just handed her. She knew, for some odd reason, that Tai wasn't being carted off to the hospital because of some sort of soccer antic. She knew him. He was careful in the game. 'It's something else.' she thought sadly.


At The Hospital


"Kamiya man, you should have seen their faces! It was priceless! Like a huge celebrity was shot or something!" chuckled Matt, as he stood beside Tai in the waiting room.

Tai had refused any sort of hospitalization, claiming to be okay. That his pain was gone completely.

"And the difference is?"said Tai smiling lamely. Matt pushed his shoulder jokingly, but shots of hot pain ripped through his shoulder and arm, making him want to pass out.

"Man. I feel sorry for Mimi." said Matt looking at one of the grey walls. "She was really worried. Maybe you should phone her." he suggested.

"As a matter of fact, I think I will." he said as he dug his hand in his soccer bag, and pulled out his wallet.

He slowly got up, as he removed his phone card, and walked over to the payphones numbly. 'At least try to look okay.' he told himself firmly, as he grabbed the receiver. He dialed Mimi's cell number, as he jabbed his card into the slot.

"Hello." said a familiar voice.

"Emily!" said Tai shocked. "Um, is Mimi there?"

"Yeah!" she said excitedly. "Here!" he could tell the phone had been passed off, as he heard a slight ruffling sound.

"Tai!" said Mimi anxiously. "Are you all right? Are you staying overnight? Do you want me to come see you?" she said rapidly.

"Slow down." he laughed. "I'm fine and I'm not staying overnight. But yes, I want you to come see me. You know I can't last that long without you." he said sweetly.

Mimi laughed. "I'll meet you at your house okay? Bye." she said hanging up, before he had a chance to answer.

"Can't last without you for long." said a mocking voice from behind Tai. He spun around. "I know what else you can't last long without." he said smiling his head off, and revealing a small bag.

"Put that away here!" hissed Tai, as he grabbed the bag. "What the hell are you doing here Leo?" he said coolly.

"Just delivering!" he said innocently. "I saw you at the game man. It's clearly with-drawl." he said matter-of-factly.

"With-drawl from what." he said, as his eyes narrowed.

"Dust man! Of dust! Don't worry. We went through the same thing. Just take a few more hits, and you'll be fine." he said pressing a small baggie into Tai's palm.

"Use it wisely man." he cautioned, as he walked away from him.

Tai looked at the contents of the bag. The fine, dust like powder was staring him right in the face. He looked around nervously, as he marched over to his bag, and told Matt he was leaving firmly.

"Tai, what abo..." Matt tried to reason.

"Screw it. I'm fine." he said, as he began breaking into a cold sweat. His cheeks had turned dark red, and his eyes were darting around fidgety. He turned on his heel, and walked out of the hospital slowly.

As soon as he knew he was a satisfactory distance away from people, he took out the bag, and began working the knot.

His hands were shaking, and he was so frustrated with tho knot, that he gave up, and just ripped the bag apart.

Some of the powder slipped out the bag, onto his hand, and Tai stared at it hungrily.

In one quick motion, be had whipped out a small, metal straw. No bigger than 3 inches long. With his index finger, Tai divided the substance, into four small piles, making sure each one was exactly the same size.

He then pushed it into the palm of his hand, and placed the metallic straw to his nose. He inhaled deeply, leaving nothing in his hand.

His nose instantly began to sting. He had to sniff several more times, before he was positive he wouldn't throw up. He leaned back against a wall, and felt instantly relieved. In fact, everything around him seemed perfect.

Small purple bunnies crossed his path, and waved at him. Tai smiled goofily at them, as he continued to walk along the bright yellow road. He was greeted several times by a large polar bear, who kept asking him, if he knew when the next train to Antarctica would be.

Tai was floating now. A big, fluffy green cloud swept him off the groung, carrying him across a vast ocean of purple. Mermaids, with hair who reached their fins smiled and waved at him, giggling.

One looked at him, and smiled secretively. She opened her mouth, as a blinding light hit his face. "Hey kid! What the hell are you trying to do, kill yourself?" said a very angry taxi driver, who just swerved out of the way, narrowly missing him.

Tai came back to his senses. He found himself stumbling across a part of town, he didn't know. Several people were staring, muttering phrases like, "he's on drugs or something."

Tai looked around him, as everybody on the street surrounded him. They were taunting phrases, pointing and giggling.

His head began swarming. His eyes started to give out. He was seeing nonexistent people surround, and laugh at him. They began changing colors so fast, it made him feel sick just watching.

He couldn't keep conscious anymore. He just gave into the blackness, which was slowly winning. He just fainted on the sidewalk, as worried passer-by's rushed over to his side.

He hadn't noticed it before, but his nose was bleeding rapidly, and the flow of blood just seemed to pour out onto his white soccer shirt.

Tai moaned. This alerted everyone in the room. All at once, they leapt to his bedside, and began rambling something, Tai hadn't caught a word of.

"Mimi." he said groggily, as that was the first and only name that popped into his head.

"Yeah." she said clutching onto his hand tightly. But, he didn't answer. He only fell right back to sleep.

Everyone in the room groaned, and went back to their original tasks. Soon after, Tai's doctor appeared. He had his medical chart in hand, and was looking at it puzzled.

"Mr. and Mrs. Kamiya, I assure you, nothing is wrong with your son. He is in perfect health. I see no possible excuse, for his pain, and fainting spells."

"Then what's wrong with him?" asked his mother, as she nervously passed a tissue in between her fingers.

"Nothing. I believe that it might just be stress." the Dr. said, as his beeper went of, and he left the room.

"That's what my friend Emily said it was. Stress." Mimi said sighing. She felt as if a mountain had been lifted from her back, but she couldn't help but feel worried.

'I know it's just not stress Tai.' she told his sleeping form. 'You've been through things a million times more stressful, but you never caved.' she squeezed his hand a little tighter, and kissed his forehead. "I have to go now." she told his family. "If there's any change, please call me."

"We will Mimi." said Kari standing in a corner. "I have your number." Mimi smiled one last time, and waked out of the room, giving him one last concerned glace.

Tai had stirred slightly. He had been awake the whole time, and was just pretending to be asleep. 'The things you learn.' he thought sneakily. He was reminded of the first conversation he had with Leo. 'At least he doesn't lie.' he thought.


FLASHBACK


"This one is my favorite. After 30 minutes, it disappears from the body, as if it was never there in the first place. The paranoia and hallucination level is at least, 10 times stronger." he said as he showed him the white powder.

"How much." said Tai, reaching for his wallet.

"First shot is free. You like, you come back for more, and we'll discuss the price." Leo said, as he handed him the pouch.

"Thanks man. I owe you one." said Tai, as he pocketed it, and walked away casually.


END OF FLASHBACK


Tai then fell into a deep sleep. He didn't want to focus on anything else. Even though he knew he felt better, he was aware of what made him feel better. 'This isn't right.' he told himself fiercely. 'Just stop right now, before you get totally addicted.' he repeated this phrase several times, until he was positive it was etched in his brain.

He then opened his eyes just a little, so he could see all the people in the room. The ones who loved him. 'I have way too much to lose if I do.' he realized. 'I'll lose my parents, my friends, my soccer career. And Mimi.' she was the last thing he wanted to lose right now. In fact, she was the last thing he wanted to lose ever. 'I love her way too much, to let anything come between us.'

Kari walked over to his bed side. She lightly kissed his cheek, and whispered I love you Tai, in his ear.

'I love you to Kari.' he thought.

"We have to go now Tai." his mom said to him. "Visiting hours are up. We'll be back tomorrow though." she finished, as she kissed his forehead, and walked out alongside Kari.

"Get some sleep son. You need your strength." his dad added, as he left the room.


A Week Later


"Nice to see you back Tai." said Daisuke all smiles. "We were getting worried over here!" they were walking along the soccer field, talking about what had been happening in the time Tai was in the hospital.

"Nice to be back." said Tai giving him a high five. "How are things going here?"

"Not well." he said sadly. "The teams been really down since you got hurt, and we forfeited two games. Nobody wants to play without you."

"I don't know if I should be honored or disappointed." said Tai. "Daisuke.

You're now the replacement captain. Okay? I have a feeling that this won't be the last time I'm out, so I want you boosting the team's confidence. That okay with you?"

Daisuke looked at Tai, as if he had just won the lottery. His eyes opened to an unnatural size, and his jaw was hanging open. "You've made me assistant captain, and then you ask if I can handle it. Are you kidding me?! This has to be the coolest thing anyone has ever done for me! This is so cool!"

"I'm glad you think so." said Tai smiling heartily. "Daisuke, you're a really talented soccer player, and you're a cool kid. I think you deserve that position more than anybody else on the team."

"Thanks Tai." he said, with admiration.

"No problem Dai. Now. Get onto that field, and start helping! I'll be down in a minute."

"Okay!" he said energetically, as he punched Tai's shoulder lightly. "You're the best Tai!"

A wave of nauseous pain filled Tai again. He stumbled backward, in order to keep his balance. His back came in contact with a hard brick wall, and he slumped to the ground, inhaling deeply.

He arms became numb, and his legs started to sting wildly. He wanted to scream out in pain, but was afraid to open his mouth, for the anguish it would surely bring him.

Tai felt something sharp being pushed into his skin, and the pain began to lessen.

He looked up into the massive blue eyes, which belonged to Leo. "You haven't been using the Dust have you?" he said angrily.

"I flushed it." snapped Tai, grateful that the pain was over, but mad because he had just been given a temporary fix.

"You idiot!" he exploded. "I designed the Dust to be addictive! You just can't flush it!"

"I have too much to lose." said Tai getting up, and rubbing his arm.

"Yeah. You'll lose use of your body parts if you don't use it." Leo said. "But never fear. Leo is here."

"Why do I have the feeling I should be scared?" smirked Tai.

"Ta-da!" he said triumphantly, holding out a syringe filled with a light blue liquid.

"What is that?" said Tai curiously.

"Something I just got. It's awesome. I tried it. Gives you the release of the Dust, but with no side-affects."

"Does it only come injectable?" asked Tai, eyeing the drug hungrily.

"Powder. Your favorite." Leo said holding out a sack of blue powder.

"Name your price." Tai said eagerly.

'What is Tai doing?' asked Daisuke. He had just returned to ask Tai if he wanted him to start the warm ups. But, instead he found Tai talking to a guy that had been expelled from several schools for selling drugs.

He stared on nervously, as he saw Tai exchange a roll of bills, for a bag of blue stuff. Tai then walked past the guy, shaking his hand. He made out the phrase "Thanks Leo," and "No problem Kamiya," before it dawned on him.

'Tai does drugs.' he said, as if his whole world had come crashing down on him. 'No. It must be some mistake.' he tried to convince himself, but found it impossible.

He turned around to start running. He just wanted to get out of there. Erase his memory, of the last few moments. But he knew they would be forever lodged in his brain.

'Not Tai.' he told himself over and over again. He had taken one giant leap, when a massive hand caught his shoulder, and pulled him in a corner.

"What did you see kid?" Leo snapped venomously.

"I saw everything, and as soon as I get away from you, I'm telling the principal." Daisuke said bravely.

"And get your friend in trouble?" leo said tauntingly. "You tell on me. Tai goes down too."

Daisuke hadn't really thought of that before. He would be getting Tai in incredible amount of trouble. He would surely be kicked off the soccer team, and would be expelled from the school.

"Why don't you try some?" Leo said invitingly. "If your hero does it, it can't be that bad!"

Daisuke though about that. "I don't do drugs." he said coldly.

"But Tai does. And I know you want to be just like him." he said knowingly. "Come on kid. I'll even give you a free sample." he said holding up a needle, half filled with a white liquid.

Daisuke looked at the liquid, torn between doing what he knew was right, and what he knew Tai would do.

"So. You in or out?" Leo said.

Daisuke sighed. "In." he said simply.



Tai had rushed home that day, to try out his new investment. He dashed up to his room, and locked himself in. There, he had everything he needed.

He reached under his bed, and pulled out his trusty parting board, and his small blade, which he used to chop it up into smaller fragments.

"Perfect." he muttered, as grabbed his faithful metallic straw, and placed it to his nose, once again. He covered his left nostril with his finger, and sniffed up, leaving no trace of the drug.

At once his nose stung. But then it was gone. In fact, his whole body loosened. He felt as though he was in heaven. No worries at all. Not one care in the world.

And still, everything was in focus. There were no brightly colored birds, or rabbits hopping around his room. He was in total control of his body.

He stood up, and walked a few steps. He didn't wobble or fall over. He managed to walk a perfect straight line.

"This is fantastic!" he shouted, as he grabbed a book. He released the object. He immediately rushed over to his bed, and began slicing through the drug, with amazing speed, inhaling in the drug very fast.

After he had finished half the bag, his head was feeling very dizzy, and he had to lie down for a little while.

When a thin stream of blood trickled down the side of his cheek, Tai got up, and walked over to the bathroom and began washing his face.

He splashed his face with a stream of cold water, and looked at his reflection. He was several shades paler, but was extremely hot. So hot, that sweat had begun dripping off his forehead. He began gasping for air, and held his head, because of the ringing sound that had just started going off.

The ringing got louder with every second, till the point it was like a gong in his head. He stumbled out of the bathroom, with his hands over his ears, in an attempt to block out the awful sound.

He crashed into the table close to his room, which held the phone, and a few papers. The phone fell to the ground with a noisy clunk, and the ringing stopped.

Tai reached out for the phone, realizing someone was trying to contact him. "Hello. Kamiya residence." he said sickly into the phone.

"Tai? You sound horrible." said Mimi sniffling. It was clear she was crying.

"What's wrong?" he asked weakly.

"Tai, I'm coming over. I'm only a few blocks away from you." she said sadly, as she hung up.

Tai dropped to the ground, and hung the phone up. His head was swimming way to fast now, and he couldn't make it stop.

What seemed like second later, there was a loud banging at the door. "It's open." he said forcefully, as he propelled himself up, and attempted to fix his hair.

Mimi looked at him horrified. Her eyes were red and puffy. Tear shot from crying so much. "Tai, what's wrong with you?" she said, as she rushed over to his side, and placed her arms around him, so he didn't tip over.

"I'm not feeling so hot." he muttered, as he slouched into her arms.

"Come on Tai. You're going to lie down." she said guiding him to his room.

"I'm okay." he groaned. "I don't need sleep."

Mimi had already dragged him to his room, and pushed open the door. Tai began to slip from her arms, but she held on tighter, not letting him slip.

She had managed to place him on his bed, and stare at him a little. "You look terrible." she said remorsefully.

"And you don't." he said playfully, as he leaned out and kissed her. She pulled away from him almost instantly.

"Tai, I think you should go to the hospital again. You really don't look good." she said, as she sat next to him.

She jumped up instantly, because she was sitting on something very uncomfortably. "What the hell is this?" she said looking at the small straw like object. At once, she turned around, and looked at the assortment of items Tai had on his bed.

"Leave that alone." Tai snapped, as he reached out to grab his possessions.

"Tai, these things." she stuttered shocked. "That stuff, it's drugs. You've been doing drugs!" she exploded angrily, and scared.

"Don't go shoving your nose in places it doesn't belong." Tai said grabbing the powered drug. "This doesn't concern you!"

"Oh course this concerns me!" she screamed at him. "Tai, look at you! You're as high as a kite! You need help!" she said, as new tears leaked down her face.

"Shut up!" he screamed as he jumped off his bed. All his senses seemed to be working overtime right now, as adrenaline coursed through his veins.

"Tai give me that!" she said reaching over, and clutching onto the bad.

"No!" he shouted. "Leave it alone!"

"Don't you see you're addicted Tai?" she said struggling to pull the bag free from his strong grasp. "I can't let you do this to yourself!"

"I said, let go!" he shouted louder.

"No!" she said defiantly.

Tai had gotten fed up of struggling with her, so he raised his hand, and brought it down on her cheek with incredible force.

Mimi's head spun around, as she released her clutch on the pouch, and fell to the ground. She felt her cheek. The stinging pain that burned. She could tell there would be a bruise there the next day.

Tai looked at her horrified. His hands were trembling, as he let the bag drop to the floor, and let the contents spill out onto the floor. "Mimi...." he muttered, as he fell down next to her, and grabbed her tightly. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." he sobbed into her soft hair.

Mimi hugged him back. "It's okay Tai." she said crying.

"It's not okay." he said angrily. "I hit you.... God... I didn't mean to... I don't want to ever hurt you."

"Tai, it's okay. Really." she said squeezing him. "Tai," she started. "I came here to tell you something about Daisuke."

He pulled apart from her slightly, so he could look into her eyes. "What's wrong with him?" he squeaked.

"Leo Li, the guy who sells the drugs." she said crying more. She squeezed her eyes shut, forcing tears out. "He gave Daisuke too much of this injection of something, which caused him to OD. He's in the hospital, and he's not expected to live."

Tai's hands had gone limp. "He saw me." he said shaking. "He saw me, and he tried to copy me." he got up from the floor, and began to walk out of the room.

"Where are you going?" Mimi asked him, wiping away her tears.

"To see him. I have to apologize. I have to make things better." he said grabbing his jacket, and dizzily sprinted out the door.

Tai looked at the smaller boy. He was hooked up to many machines, which were keeping him alive, until he met his inedible death.

"Dai, I'm sorry." Tai said clutching at his hand. "You shouldn't have done this to yourself!" he said to him heatedly. "You shouldn't have done this to yourself!

You're going to die because of me!" he said crying on him.

"No. It was my fault." he said weakly. Tai's head shot up.

"Please Dai, don't die on me. It'll be all my fault." said Tai teary.

"Tai, I knew it wasn't right to accept the needle, but I did." Daisuke said hoarsely.

"Please, just try to keep fighting! Think of all the things you have going for you!" Tai said pleading.

"Tai, I know as well as you do, that I'm not going to make it. I just want you to promise me, you'll stop. I don't want you ending up like me." he said whispering now.

"Dai... I promise." said Tai. "I swear I'll get help."

"Good." he croaked. "Tai, you're my hero. You are exactly the person I want to be."

"I'm a monster." he said guiltily. "I did this to you!" he repeated.

"You're not a monster. You're the most courageous, awesome person I know. I always hoped I could be like you. I always wanted to be like you."

"Dai, right now, I wish I were you. I wish I had your understanding. I wish I had your forgiving nature. I want to be in your place right now. You're just a kid! You should be playing soccer, and picking flowers or something."

"Me, pick flowers." Daisuke said forcing the words.

"The point is, you should be here." Tai sharply. "Daisuke. Please. You have to pull through this."

"Tai, please." Daisuke said. "Don't make this harder."

"No." he said fiercely. "I'm gonna help you get better. I won't let you die! Just try to stay alive."

"I'll try." he said coughing. "I'll try."


EPILOGUE


Daisuke ended up getting better. Within a month, he was out of the hospital, but had to keep going back for weekly injections, to keep the drug from becoming addictive to him.

Tai, with Mimi's help, went to a Youth Clinic, that specialized in drug assistance. He had to go to monthly meetings, and was given prescribed medication to cure the pain he went through, on withdraw.

Leo Li disappeared after Daisuke went into shock, and was captured by the police two months later. He was sent to a Juvenile Detention, where he stayed for two years, under drug involvement.

MORAL: Just say no to drugs. I know that sounds like a Smokey the Bear thing, but it's true. Even if all the kids are doing it, to act 'cool', all they're really doing is killing themselves slowly. Seriously, would you rather be alive and smart, or cool and dead?

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