First impressions are funny in a way. The sad thing about them is you only get one shot; you either hit or miss. I have never liked first impressions because they are probably the worst form of prejudice this world has ever seen. Take my ex-best friend for instance. When we first met, I thought he was a great guy; one I could depend on and confide in. Yet I was wrong. I learnt the hard way; that those you seem to confide in the most always end up hurting you the greatest.
They are together again. I hate it when they rub it in my face that way. I could have been him; I could have been the one holding Jamie right now. Arg! Why does he always get all the lucky breaks? I have been friends' with Jamie longer than he has. I should be the one holding the stunning blonde in my arms right now.
The only thing I hate more than him is the look of pure contentment on both their faces when they are together. Jamie's smile is almost blinding, clearly radiating love and bliss. I would know, I have seen the look so many times, clearly reflected in my eyes every time I look at the blonde beauty.
The sad thing is, this is as close as I am getting to Jamie. I have watched them from afar, from up close. I have been there through the worst of their relationship, the bumps and the dead ends. I have watched the one person I love more than anything, have their beautiful heart shattered. I have always been there, patiently waiting as I picked up the delicate shards as he left Jamie crying and alone. I always manage to slice open my fingers as the blistering heart slivers burned my flesh and shattered my hope. This is probably because he is always there the next day, a bouquet of gorgeous flowers in hand and tender apologies on his lips. Jamie always falls in love with him all over again when he does this; completely forgetting the heartache he caused mere hours ago.
They are hugging now. Jamie is laughing happily, the sound is so creamy and clear as it fills up the arena. We are all watching him play rugby. He is the captain of the team, handsome, intelligent and funny. No, not funny. Absolutely fall down holding your gut hilarious. Every boy in school wants to be him and every girl want to be with him. God, out of all those adoring fans, why did he have to choose the one human that made my life worthwhile?
Yet none of that matters to me at the minute. I will just sit back in the shadows, watching them the way I always do. One day, he will hurt Jamie in a way that will be unfixable. That is when I will emerge from the dark and pick up the pieces. Maybe, just maybe, for once, they will not burn.
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