7.15 - 7.16
i can't remember the entirity of this dream. but here's the bit that i do remember. we're on some sort of family outing. with us is katy, some other female friend (whose name i can't recall) and a rather heavyset male. i can't remember his name either. for some reason we decide we have to get to the highest point in a certain area. we're already on a catwalk-like bridge a couple hundred feet in the air. there's a suspended building not too far away from the catwalk. suspended. it has two levels to it, and it's just sort of hovering there being held up by balloons. about four feet away from the catwalk is a ladded that's connected to the bottom of the building, leading to the first level. since this will take us to the highest spot, we decide to go for it. but we'll have to jump from the catwalk onto the ladder. it doesn't seem too hard, except that the ladder is a bit higher than the catwalk. i'm very skeptical about jumping in the first place, but i see everyone else do it successfully. i wouldn't want to be left behind, not knowing what's at the top of that suspended building, so i go for it. i barely grasp the bottom rung of the ladder, but i'm able to pull myself up until i can get a foothold and then climb all the way to the first level of the building. keep in mind that this building is suspended with balloons, so everytime someone moves on it, it rocks a bit. now everyone was up. we just had to get to the second level. there was another ladder for that, but it was on an outcrop of the second level. so we'd have to jump off the first level and hope we can get the ladder without plummeting down a couple hundred feet. i watch the heavyset guy do it successfully. the entire time, the building is rocking quite hard. everyone else makes it to the second level. that's when i decided not to. i was alone now. and that's as much as i can remember.

thoughts
the only thing i can really gather from this is my fear of being completely alone. i desire the spotlight, or at least some sort of attention. i think this dream symbolizes that attention doesn't come without effort. i'll have to keep up with people for them to notice me. my greatest fear of all, the worst thing someone could ever to to me is reject me. i think that's what this dream was about. rejection.