I fucking hate facebook. My little brother has a facebook, so every once in a while, I have to see how these people waste their lives. Him and his little friends go down to the fucking gas station, and just take shitty pictures of themselves all day, and post them on facebook. Who takes pictures for the expressed fucking purpose of posting them for strangers to jack-off to them? Do they get a weird high off it? I don't know. I think they're probably attention freaks who bask in the idea that they're friends beat-off to their pictures all day. Seriously, all they think about (besides how hot all their friends look in their pictures) are A.) how many people are jacking off to their greatest at the given moment, B.) how they can squander their time pumping gas and taking shitty pictures with one hand so it doesn't come out well (but I guess thats the "cool" thing to do) and C.) buying extra large but plugs. I'm pretty sure every facebook profile is exactly the same, consisting completely of the shit of it's self-worshipping creator:

Interests: this is code for a shitty sarcastic joke about something funny that they don't do, and any sports they play. Who fucking cares! If you actually know the person, then you know their interests, unless you don't know them, which is possibly the lamest thing ever. But I digress...

Favorite TV shows: A few lameass primetime TV shows that everyone in America watches. What TV show you watch doesn't define who you are in any meaningful way you dumb fucks. Oh, I forgot, your life is so empty and meaningless you need dumbass web profiles to define it. My bad.

Favorite books: It would appear no one on facebook reads books, since every single person things there funny by saying something like "books are for stoopid people" (for something reason, they thing abrieviating stupid to "stoopid" somehow makes it shorter... should've read more books dumbass!) or "reading is for the weak".... Wow, that would almost be funny if it wasn't part of the weird sadistic hive mind that is facebook.

Favorite quotes: Selected quotes from Van Wilder and Animal House.

About Me: This would be where you put the shreds of your personality that cannot be fit into "Favorite TV shows". Needless to say, no one fills this out.

The Wall: Oh wow, thats really clever, they called it the wall instead of "Comments", which aside from being more descriptive, doesn't make it sound like some retarded "hip" shit. This is the same web site, that informs me that Links2 isn't supported by saying "keep it real" and get a new browser. I have a message for facebook and it's users: saying things like "Keep it real" about web browsers isn't cool, it's unacceptable. Links2 (and BrowseX, also unsupported, not by their web site, by the shitty browser detection script they use) is robust enough to support your shitty site, don't make me "keep it real" and download a piece of shit browser, or use a shitty OS with a integrated browser (a good thing to toute on shitty advertising slides which you install your propaganda machine) like the rest of your mentally disabled user base. I had to install X11 to view your shitty page. FUCK YOU! You destroyed the sanctity of my computing environment! But of course whoever wrote your god forsaken shitrag of a website didn't take intelligent users into account and said "anybody stupid enough to use this shit won't know the difference. Thats "The Wall" in a nutshell.

These are of course the same people who spell "The", "da", becuase they are above capitalizing things, and typing one more letter, to make it easier to read. They also seem to think it isn't their responisibility to protect their identity, beucase, posting your picture, full name, school and address isn't asking to be raped, it's pretty much guarenteeing it. Darwin says let them die. What makes this twisted concoction is that whever the slightest thing is updated,it sends everyone they know, assuming they care that their relationship status changed from "Anything I can get" to "Boning a large dominatrix".

The Mini-feed takes up half the page... how can that be considered mini you dipshits. I forgot, your cool and use things like "Poke" and "Keep it real" to cover up real meaning like "Pay attention to me" or "Are web developers suck, so you have to use a shitty browser".

Good work asshats, now everyone can learn the most superficial details of your life. Go eat your own self-righteous shit.