Don's Spanking Pages

In an earlier post, I alluded to "Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend," and since then, the damned song's been constantly running through my mind. To exorcize it, I scribbled the following. But it's just for laughs. The preferences and opinions expressed do not necessarily represent the views of the moderators of even the author.

Bird <bird4444@hotmail.com>
(with apologies to Jule, Leo, Marilyn, Carol, and
anyone else associated with the song)


PADDLES ARE A SUB'S BEST FRIEND

Copyright © 1998

A switch on the hand may be quite instrumental,
But paddles are a sub's best friend.
A switch can command and it's oh, so parental
With your age-play flames,
But other dames
Like grown-up games.
Straps and belts leave nasty welts
That can take till next weekend to mend.
But spruce, oak, or pine wood
Just try them--Ben Stein would.
Paddles are a sub's best friend.

There may come a day when a guy wants to birch you
But paddles are a sub's best friend.
Those twigs look O.K., but they'll draw blood and hurt you,
So beware of treats
That stain your sweet's
Designer sheets.
Canes and crops are swell for tops
But for bottoms, they're had to defend.
But no matter whether they're wood or they're leather,
Paddles are a sub's best friend.

I've heard of a scene that involved Scottish tawses,
But paddles are a sub's best friend.
Why, hoot, mon, it's mean, and what damage it causes!
So when Scotland's said,
Just turn instead
To Johnny Red.
A martinet is hard to get, and large whips I just can't comprehend. But even in plastic, these toys are fantastic
Paddles are a sub's best friend.

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