“Mrs. White” and “Mr. Green” start walking around the Lounge. It’s a pretty big room, but then again – that’s to be expected in a mansion. All the rooms are big.

Mrs. White: Well, none of the drawers are opened or look like they’ve been gone through. So the killer didn’t even go to the effort to try to make it look like a robbery. If anything is missing, the killer knew just where to look.

Mr. Green: A CLUE!

Mrs. White: What? What is it?

The doc picks up a knife that was laying on a desk.

Mr. Green: Wow… I have a knife. Something just feels… feels right. Like I should always have a knife with me. Like, almost as if I’m just a lame one-dimensional character without it, but having it makes me more awesome than ever before. Yes, I shall keep this weapon. And from this day forward, I shall be known as “Doctor Abortion with Kni-”

*YOINK*

Mrs. White: Gimmie that! Hrm… there isn’t any blood on it.

Mr. Green: It coulda been cleaned off.

Mrs. White: Yeah. I suppose so. But the police never really told us how he was killed. I mean they told us the butler died from blunt trauma… but now how Mr. Boddy went down. Let’s get a closer look at the body’s outline.

They head to the side of the room with the blood stain and outline, and look at it.

Mrs. White: Well, the blood stain is all around the head area. Maybe someone busted him open with a blunt object to the back of his head, like the butler.

Mr. Green: Or the blood could be around the head because his neck was slit.

Mrs. White: True. The way the blood has soaked all over the carpet there makes it hard to tell. But if it was done with a knife… why would it have been cleaned off and left right here in the room? The murderer would have had to have taken it somewhere else… cleaned it off… and then brought it back. If it were me, I would have gotten rid of the weapon instead of placing it back in the room.

Mr. Green: If it were you… huh?

Mrs. White: Don’t look at me like that!

Mr. Green: I see your point though. Still, it’s not impossible that the knife was used. We better hold onto it just in case.

Mrs. White: We? More like I. No way am I letting you hold onto this thing, crazy man.

Law takes a nearby handkerchief, wraps the knife’s blade in it, and slips it into his back pocket for safe keeping.

Mr. Green: Oh – like I can trust you with it. What if you’re the murderer?

Mrs. White: Please, what reason would I have to kill a man I didn’t know?

Mr. Green: He looked like Ted DiBiase. Everyone knows Law Martin hates Ted DiBiase! It’s an ancient feud! And now I’ll retell an epic part of that feud in wholly accurate detail…

Law Martin: Ted DiBiase, you killed my parents in front of my eyes! It’s time for payback!

Ted DiBiase: Mwahaha. I killed them, and if I had a second chance I’d kill them again. Just like I’m going to finish the job and kill you!

Ted DiBiase cocks his pistol and points it at law.

Law Martin: Oh, I don’t think so.

Law delivers an awesome roundhouse kick and then punches Ted DiBiase right in the chest, breaking through and grabbing onto Ted’s heart. He tears it out and puts it in front of DiBiase’s eyes, still beating. Law feasts upon it as Ted falls to the ground.

Mr. Green: Oh, I think I know you too well, Mrs. White. IF THAT IS YOUR REAL NAME!

Mrs. White: It’s not. My real name is “Law Martin.”

Mr. Green: Oh right. Still, I know something about you. You’re a perv that promotes the statutory rape of minors.

Mrs. White: AGE SHOULD NOT HAVE AN INFLUENCE ON THE LAW, JUST LIKE RACE AND GENDER SHOULD NOT! DAMN THE AGE OF CONSE- uhhmmm… err… I mean “No.” No, that’s not true either. *nervous sweat*

Mr. Green: Look, I really don’t know things about other Wrasslers. I’ve never really had many “partners” or “stables” or anything. I am an independent person that doesn’t get to know others that well. I mean occasionally there will be someone every once and a while I’ll get to know. Like back in the UWF last November. There was this chick called “Dot Com.” She was this really ugly nerd chick.

Mrs. White: Oh really?

Mr. Green: Yeah, but then I decided to class her up and make her into a hot pornstar-type chick. I gave her implants and slutted her up. Then when she was hot I totally had tons of sex with her. A lot. I mean TONS of sex. She would scream my name like, “Oh Doctor Abortion, you’re the greatest lover I have ever-”

*WHOMP*

Law delivers a solid right cross to Dr. Abortion’s face, sending him down coincidentally into the outline of Mr. Boddy’s corpse.

Mrs. White: -LIAR! YOU-

Just then the door opens and in walks everyone’s favorite totally innocent fat doorman that surely could not be the coconspirator in the murder who had a, and I quote, “voice that might have suggested that he was a bigger fella.”

Knobbert Gobbler: What are you two doing in here? RUINING THE CRIME SCENE?!

Mr. Green: Only one of them. I mean the butler got murdered too. I have yet to hilariously lay down in the outline of the Butler’s body. Has be been moved yet for me?

Knobbert Gobbler: Get out! GET OUT OF HERE!

Mrs. White: No way, the police said they’re going to arrest us ALL if we don’t solve this crime before the night is over. And even though I’m fairly sure that it’s illegal to just arrest everyone when you can’t find out who did it, it’s what’s going to happen. We’re doing what we were told to do. Search this house and find the killer or killers! This is where Mr. Boddy was killed and we have every right to be here.

Mr. Green: Yeah… why are you so scared, Mr. Gobbler, huh? HUH? Maybe YOU had something to do with the killing!

Knobbert Gobbler: Me? Mr. Boddy was like a family member to me!

Mr. Green: Yeah, sorry about that. I got carried away. I think it’s pretty clear you’re totally innocent.

Mrs. White: Shh, Doc! Like a family member, you say – Knobby? You know, family members who learn that they’re going to be left out of an inheritance when a will is about to be changed often get quite angry.

Knobbert Gobbler: What are you implying?

Mrs. White: Did you know Mr. Boddy was changing his will?

Knobbert Gobbler: Of course I did, I live in this house. He casually mentioned that he was working on re-writing it.

Mrs. White: And were you going to be in that new will?

Knobbert Gobbler: How would I know? It’s not as if he discussed it in great detail with me.

Mrs. White: And we don’t know either. Because he never got to complete it. So who knows what he would have written? I suspect one of the house staff did.

Knobbert Gobbler: One of us? NEVER! He was alive and well. Everything was perfectly find until you -UGH- “Wrasslers” showed up. That’s when he was killed! I don’t know why he even liked or invited you filth.

Mr. Green: Filth? FILTH? I am quite clean. In fact, I was just in a hot tub not that long ago. With Celebrity Starlets. Here are Polaroids! Hrm, wait, I don't see any girls in these pictures. Maybe I left the lens cap on or something.

Knobbert Gobbler: Grrr… just make sure you actually find out which one of you four really did it and stop adding insult to injury by ruining the evidence in this room and making it so the real killer will never be found!

Angrily, Knobbert walks back from where he came, and slams the door behind him – leaving the two alone again.