Ms. C is Knocked Up I found this post on my computer a while back. It’s not really anything super relevant, but I saved it for some reason. Sometimes I save posts temporality to work on them, and then delete them when I’m done. I assume this is just one of those which I forgot to delete and got buried. However, it was fortuitous that it was saved because it seems to be a somewhat important post in the “Ms. C is pregnant” angle which developed. The date from the word document it was on places it in February, and I’ll set it chronologically before the Feb/Mar BRB, as pregnant Ms. C seems to be already eliminated from my plotlines by then. The pregnant Ms. C angle will come to its conclusion at Evil vs. Evil.

Damn. Dragonslayer has more heat than me.
02/07/02

The doc from DC, the practical practitioner, the maniacal medic, the Physician on a Mission – Dr. Abortion – he’s in his locker room with his wacky crew of characters.

Ms. C: Oh God…my stomach is starting to feel bad again… I’ve got to go to the bathroom…

She runs over…

Ms. C: Ewww! There’s blood in here!

Roe: Yeah. Wade cut his leg… or maybe it was his arm. I can’t remember. It took me a while to find the gauze.

Injured Wade: You’d think in a locker room run by a doctor there would be more medical supplies.

Dr. A: Shut up.

The Bathroom door slams just as Ms. C locks herself in.

Roe: So what do you think Ms. C is doing in there?

Wade: You know. She’s probably got morning sickness… from her… uhh… *whispering* pregnancy.

Dr. A: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!

Wade: Nothing boss, nothing!

Dr. A: No! I heard you! You said Ms. C is pregnant! Don’t you start that up again… this whole stupid Stephanie McMahon thing getting pregnant is just throwing water on the fire. Its not my fault is Stephanie McMahon mildly resembles my girlfriend.

Roe: *if she were your girlfriend then maybe the baby would be yours*

Dr. A: What are you grumbling over there?!

Roe: Uh… hehe… I said… “if glee were your whirl wind then maybe the rabies would be cured.”

Dr. A: That sentence makes absolutely no sense… and generally rhymes with the sentence I thought I heard, and if I thought what I heard is in fact what you said then you are about to be one aborted midget.

Wade: Wake up and accept reality, boss! Ms. C is knocked up.

Dr. A: You insolent bastard.

Wade: And the baby isn’t yours. Remember? The screwdriver accident? It rendered you impotent.

Dr. A: Never talk about that again… unless you want to end up like my last lackey, Baby Bubba… GONE.

The bathroom door opens. Ms. C walks out, holding her stomach.

Ms. C: Oh. I feel much better now. But I have a craving… mmm… to the kitchen!

She dashes off.

Dr. Abortion’s eye begins to twitch uncontrollably.

Dr. A: I’m going to kill her.

Roe & Wade: *gasp*…

Roe: No way! You’re Ms. C’s obedient little servant!

Wade: Yeah… remember. You’re totally whipped and serve her. Everything you do you are told to do by her. You puppet.

Dr. A: Not any more. She may have invented that whole “I hate babies” thing to get me over… it may have been fictional at once… a ploy to get heat. But now its become part of my life… its who I am. And the thought that there is a bloody, disgusting organism growing in her, makes me want to kick her right in the stomach.

Roe: You mean the “uterus,” right?

Dr. A: I’m a doctor, DAMNIT! I know what I have to kick!

Wade: But she was the one behind us faking our deaths. She made us do the Muslim angle. You’re not thinking of insurrection, are you?

Dr. A: I’m going to kill that baby if it’s the last thing I do.

Roe: You mean like when Prototype hit Chickie with that Toaster Oven.

Wade: No way man. It wasn’t a toaster oven… it was just a plain toaster.

Dr. A: SILENCE! There is nothing plain about a toaster. The way they magically transform bread to toast is a miracle of the world. But I’m not here to talk about that. I’m here to kill Ms. C’s unborn child…

Roe: Who’s do you think it is?

Wade: Whitey’s?

Dr. A: No. They hadn’t met yet when this must have happened. It doesn’t really matter though. The paternity test will be much easier to do when that baby is prematurely out of the room and we can stick needles in it and stuff.

Roe: Why would you stick needles in a fetus?

Dr. A: Everyone needs a hobby.