(The scene opens up at Doozer's house. Doozer is just waking up. He gets up, gets in the shower and gets dressed. After him, The Dude hops in and does his thing. Then, Dusty follows. Yojin hops right in after Dusty gets done. They all dress in their finest clothes. Yojin is wearing a fine tuxedo, a tie, and dress shoes. The Dude is wearing a long sleeved shirt, with a T-shirt under it, khaki pants, and nice shoes. Dusty is wearing a new pair of underwear, a black T-shirt with some bread crumbs on it, and a new pair of jeans{that are unbelievably tight since he just bought them and they were the largest in the store}. Doozer is wearing a T-shirt labeled "I'm down with Dre," and baggy cargo pants, basketball shoes, and sun-glasses. They are all sitting down, when suddenly a crew of show maker guy people parade into Doozer's house. They set up all the stuff and get ready to kick off some new shows. But before they do, they talk.)

Director: Alright, I am the director of this show. Oh, right off I made a mistake. This will not be just one show. This is going to be a series on MTV. Yes, a series of three shows. Each show is one hour long. One show is here, in Doozer's house. The second is outside of the house. And the third is at the arena.

The Dude: Hey, don't we need names or something for this show. I mean, we can't just have a show without a name, that won't be good.

Director: Did I say that I was going to answer people's questoins?

Dusty: No, you didn't.

Director: Alright, now that I have told you all what to do. I am ready for any and all questions.

Yojin Musahiri: Alright, so are we going to have names for each of these three shows? Are we also going to have a name for the series? I know this is MTV, but the series of shows needs a name, too.

The Dude: He just totally stole my question, that isn't fair.

Director: Well, life's a bitch and so aren't you. Now, yes we will have names for each of Doozer's shows and also a name for the series. Doozer, since it is your series and your shows, you dish out the names.

Doozer: Alright, I was thinking since we are apart of the network MTV that the name of the series should be DTV, Doozer Television. It flows, too. DTV, DTV, DTV, yeah dawg.

Dusty: *acts like a wigger{white... for all you people who don't like the nigger word, I will use black person. a wigger is a white person, who acts like he is black} Yeah, word up homey g. What up, yo? I'm just kicking back, maxing, relaxing, chilling on your pad dawg.

Director: Alright, big retard on the right *points to dusty*... shut up please. Now, DTV, Doozer Television, good thinking Doozer. I think that is a good name for a series on MTV. Now, what do you want to name your show that takes place inside your very own home.

Doozer: Well, I was thinking about you know how there is that show called "The Strip?" Well, this could be "The Pad." I don't really know about it, but it could work.

Director: No, I think that name is alright. So, the first show on the new series, DTV, is "The Pad."

Dusty: No, no, no, no, I got a better one. How about... "The Home of The Homies." I mean, since I think Doozer wants to go with the whole I'm a wigger type of deal, we should go with that.

Doozer: Dusty, I didn't know you could speak with a shread of intelligence, that really surprised me. Yeah, I think "The Home of The Homies" is a great name for it. That name will definately work.

Director: Alright, so the first show in the new MTV series, DTV, is "The Home of The Homies." That is great, I didn't expect that out of that big moron. Now, we have to think of a name for the show that takes place outside of the house.

Doozer: Oh, dawg, I already go that one covered, yo. That show is going to be named after one of my favorite songs that was re-mixed greatly by the kings of slack rock, Dynamite Hack, yeah the song called "Boyz 'N The Hood."

Director: Alright, so the order of the MTV series, DTV, is first off "The Home of The Homies" and following that is "Boyz 'N The Hood." Now, all we need is a name for the show that takes place at the arena.

Yojin Musahiri: Oh, that is an easy one. That should just be called "Talkin' Shit." Simply because that is exactly what Doozer does and that is exactly what Doozer is great at and that is exactly what makes Doozer great.

Doozer: Well, you are giving me quite a big head there, Yojin. You know that you are my second manager. You and The Dude are both my managers. Oh, and that name fits perfectly.

Director: Alright, so in the new series on MTV, called DTV, the first show is "The Home of The Homies" which is followed by "Boyz 'N The Hood" and shortly after that the third and final episode of "Talkin' Shit." That is great, guys, just great. Now, all we have to do is tape what you guys do. See, I don't want the first couple of shows being rehearsed because you guys usually don't rehearse and we don't want to do a total 360 on the fans, they won't like it. So, the first couple of shows are just going to be natural. Alright, right now we are just going to get on the air in a few seconds, so hold tight everybody.

(The scene switches over to MTV...)

Voice during the Credits of Celebrity Death-Match: Alright, next on MTV our new mini-series called DTV!!! Yes, Doozer Television, a series of three shows that show the life of DWF's own and soon to be Hardcore Champion, Doozer. This is a mini-series of three seperate shows, the first is called "The Home of The Homies" which is followed by "Boyz 'N The Hood" which is followed lastly, but not leastly by "Talkin' Shit." Well, here it is...

(All of a sudden, you hear "Ain't Nuthin but a G Thang" by Dr. Dre and Doozer's entrance video is shown the on TV, followed by Dusty's, followed by Yojin's, followed by The Dude's. Then, that scene turns over to Doozer and his friends at his house.)

Doozer: Yo, yo, yo, yo whazzzzup everybody? The Dooze in the house here. I'm just maxing and relaxing with my gang of Dusty, Yojin, and The Dude here. You are watching... D-T-V!!! And now, the first episode of "The Home of The Homies!!!"

Doozer: Alright, so anybody got any ideas of what we are going to do here today?

Dusty: Let's play... Checkers!!!

Doozer: You are retarded, so just shut up.

The Dude: How about we just sit around and watch the Boob Tube?

Doozer: Yeah, that's sounds cool with me.

Yojin Musahiri: Alright, let's check out what's on TV.

Doozer: Isn't this kind of retarded, though? I mean, we are watching TV, while we are on TV.

Yojin Musahiri: Well, this is your TV show man, DTV, Doozer Television. It's not YTV, it's DTV. So, we do what you want us to do man.

Dusty: I want do everything you tell me to do.

(Doozer holds up his fist to Dusty.)

Dusty: Okay, I'll suck your pee-pee.

Doozer: Alright, I did not ask you to suck on my dilly-dally.

Dusty: I mean, I didn't say that. It was the one-eyed man behind me.

Doozer: Whatever...

Dusty: You know what Doozer? I think being on the TV is making me sick, it's probably butterflies, but I feel like I'm going to hurl.

Doozer: Don't do it, 'cause if you Unload your Lunch, then I'm probably gonna spill my cookies. And if I Spew, then that will send of a whole barfing chain reaction. That just would be a disaster for the first episode of our show.

The Dude: Disasters aren't all that bad... *starts sticking his finger down his throat*

Yojin Musahiri: *sees Doozer nod his head to him and knows just what to do and slaps The Dude, then backhands Dusty* Take that bizatches.

Doozer: Alright, this show is really starting to reek of boredomeness. So, we better do something. I say we...

Dusty: *rubbing his head* Whatch the TV?

The Dude: Yeah, I heard there is a new half comedy, half action series of three shows starting right around this time on MTV. No, there is thirty minutes left in the first show though.

(Yojin starts to tell The Dude that it is their show, but Doozer stops him because he wants to make The Dude feel like a retard on Television.)

The Dude: *switches it to MTV*... OH... MY... GOD... I am on the Television!!! Look, I am right there looking at a TV. I wonder what is on the TV?... Oh... My... God... I am on the TV on the TV!!! I am watching the TV on the TV on the TV. That's awesome.

Dusty: Dude, you are such a moron. I can't believe that you actually didn't know... That is me on the TV, not you... I AM A TV STAR!!! That is me on the TV on the TV too and I'm watching TV on that TV that's on the TV. So, take that you retard. How stupid can they get.

Doozer: Well, obviously pretty damn stupid.

Yojin Musahiri: That is pretty damn sad, but very damn true. I almost feel pity those two, I would hate to be even half as stupid as those two.

Doozer: Yeah, I know. I am very thankful for that.

Yojin Musahiri: Well... I have to go somewhere... and take care of something...

Doozer: Alright, don't get into too much trouble. I don't want any bad things happening during my shows because of one of the cast members.

Yojin Musahiri: Trust... me... nothing bad... will happen...

(The camera focuses back on Dusty and The Dude who are stilling watching themselves on MTV.)

The Dude: Hey, I just noticed when I talk in real life, I also talk on the TV.

Dusty: But my mommy told me that the TV isn't real and what happens on it isn't real.

The Dude: That would mean that you aren't real because you are on the TV right now.

Dusty: You calling my mommy a liar? Because you just do not want to go there, Mr. Dude Guy Thingy Person!!!

(Camera goes back to Doozer.)

Doozer: I can't believe I got stuck with these two retards, this is just insane.

(The minutes fly by as The Dude and Dusty continue their pointless argument and Doozer just sits down shaking his head and slapping himself every coupld of minutes. Then, Yojin comes bursting through the door, he is panting.)

Doozer: Oh, I am really, really happy that you are back. Hey, you are panting... What did you do?

Yojin Musahiri: Oh, I was just running from the cop... Umm, that old gramma down the road swinging her purse. Yeah, she's one back mother-f(censored)cker.

Doozer: Yo dawg, you can't say that on TV!!!

Yojin Musahiri: Man, this isn't TV, this is MTV and on top of that this is, DTV!!! It is your series, Doozer Television, we can do whatever the hell we want to.

Doozer: Yeah dawg, I guess that's right. So, why do you have blood on your hands and clothes anyway?

Yojin Musahiri: Um, I had an accident?

Doozer: Are you asking me, or telling me? If you did have an accident, what did you do? Have a period all over yourself?

Yojin Musahiri: It really was an accident though and I'm telling the truth about the gramma. I was driving along... la-de-da. When, suddenly some gramp just jumped out in front of me and I hit him, then the grammy chased me back to the house because my car broke down and she was scary.

Doozer: Alright, I almost believe you. But, did the grampa truthfully jump out infront of you?

Yojin Musahiri: Alright, he might of... damn it, he was wearing a T-shirt that said "The Bad Asses In Black were just a Fluke" so I ran him over.

Doozer: He had a T-shirt that called our old tag team a fluke? Damn, I hope you killed that mofo.

Yojin Musahiri: You damn right, I did.

Doozer: SCORE!!! *slaps hands with Yojin. looks towards and stares into the camera* Oh, hello children, the little scene that you just saw was not true. Do not run over any old people that are offending you. Respect your elders.

Yojin Musahiri: *also stares into the camera* And the blood on my hands, I know it looks real, but it isn't... Actually, it is real. It is my own blood, I just got a deep paper cut and used it to make up that unusually real and convincing story.

Doozer: While we are at this... don't do drugs. Do you want to be like The Dude and Dusty. I mean, Dusty didn't do drugs, but still you will end up like him. And, The Dude did, you don't want to be like him at all.

Yojin Musahiri: Well, time is up folks. Here we are at "The Home of The Homies" and we are signing off.

Director: And... cut. Good first show, boys. It was really good, honestly. I think Dusty and The Dude should actually get some scripts to go by so that they are not so retarded.

Doozer: No way dawg, that brings in comedy. Hey, don't we have another show to do right now?

Director: We have a couple of minutes of commercials to waste. But, I guess we should get ready anyway.

(Doozer, Dusty, The Dude, and Yojin Musahiri, and the crew all hop into a huge stretched limousine of Doozer's. Doozer tells the limousine driver just to keep circling the town until they find something interesting, so he does just that.)

Director: Alright, it is just about time to get back on the air with the first episode of "Boyz 'N The Hood."

Doozer: I am ready for it, dawg. "Boyz 'N The Hood" is going to kick mega stank ass. This is gonna be probably the highlight show of all three in DTV.

Dusty: Yeah, I am ready for this kick your mom's bum-bum show. This is really going to rock some... stuff.

The Dude: For the first time, I couldn't agree with Dust more.

Yojin Musahiri: Oh, why do they have to be so retarded? And why does there have to be two of them? One is bad enough.

Director: Alright, we are starting in one... two... three... now...

Doozer: What's up homies? As you can see, it is me, Dusty, The Dude, and Yojin kicking back in my stretched limousine. We are just circling The Hood looking for places to go and women to do. I mean, places go and things to do.

Dusty: How do you do women?

Doozer: Nevermind, Dusty, I can't bear to tell your virgin ears.

The Dude: Haha, take that you crap-sniffing butt-licker.

Dusty: Oh, you want to go? Right here right now.

The Dude: How about we take this outside?

Doozer: No problem *nods to Yojin who gets ready to open the limousine door* Just tuck and roll boys. *yojin opens the door on his side and Doozer chucks The Dude out and pushes Dusty out* Remember, tuck and roll.

Yojin Musahiri: That was kind of harsh though.

Doozer: Oh, they'll live. No brain, no pain.

Yojin Musahiri: That goes double for them.

Doozer: Hey, what's going on up there? It looks like there are some people hanging out down there or something. I say we check it out.

Yojin Musahiri: I couldn't agree with you more, Doozer. I say we go and check it out up there. Dusty and The Dude will see that we stopped and eventually get to us.

(Doozer tells the limousine driver to stop up to where the people are all at. So, once they get their the limousine stops and Doozer and Yojin Musahiri hop out of the limousine.)

Guy #1: What do you two punks want?

Guy #2: Yeah, these two punks think that they are cool since they drive around in a stretched limousine.

Guy #3: They think that, but they aren't.

Doozer: Alright, first off you mofo, how do you have a clue of what I am thinking, dawg? Actually, I am thinking that if you three fags want to keep on tripping, then me and Yojin are gonna put our feet between each and everyone of your asses.

Guy #1: Yo, there are three of us and only two of you essays.

The Dude: Count that three of us essays, fudge packeray.

Dusty: Actually, that is five now wee wee head.

Doozer: No, actually that is four now. But you two only add up to one real person, so I guess it is three against three. You mofos still want to rumble?

Guy #2: *with a little stutter in his voice* W-who are y-you playa h-haters anyway?

Doozer: I'm Doozer, the soon to be Dream Wrestling Federation Hardcore Champion. He is Yojin Musahiri, a retired Dream Wrestling Federation superstar. He, is Dusty, a soon to be Dream Wrestling Federation People's Champion, and next to him is The Dude. He is just The Dude. So, I don't like you to much. I think you boys should step the f(censored)ck back.

Guy #3: Yo, we glass homeboy, we glass. Don't break us man. We are gone like a tree.

Yojin Musahiri: It's be like a tree and leave, retard. Now you better scram before we decide to fight.

(As they start to leave... they turn around and pull out guns to the head of each wrestler, except for Dusty who runs away screaming.)

Doozer: Hey, they can't show this on TV. Director, dude, say something to cover this up and get us off the air.

Director: The last part of the episode "Boyz 'N the Hood" and all of the episode of "Talkin' Shit" is going to be postponed because of... technical difficulties, that's it. Watch later tonight to see what happens to Doozer, The Dude, and Yojin as they are the "Boyz 'N The Hood."

(Scene fades to...)

ON