(The scene opens back up with the continuation of "Boyz ‘N The Hood." It starts off exactly where it left off when Dusty ran off crying and Doozer, Yojin, and The Dude are being held at gun point.)

Doozer: Yeah, that’s right. I said we are being taped on TV. Actually, MTV and this is apart of my series of three shows called DTV, Doozer Television. This is the second show of the series called, "Boyz ‘N The Hood." Like I said before, I don’t think I like you too much.

(Doozer nods to Yojin, who nods to The Dude. Suddenly, Doozer, The Dude, and Yojin kick each Guy in the balls at the exact same time. Doozer upper-cuts his guy, The Dude delivers a big knee to the face to his, and Yojin punches his guy hard in the nose, forcing the nose to be projected up and threw the brain, killing him. Doozer turns around and looks at Yojin and just shakes his head, Yojin motions to him that his guy is creeping up from behind him, but Doozer just does a version of the getto knock, when you are facing back to something and back kick it hard, to the guy and almost breaks the guys leg. The Dude spits in his guys eye, then bites off his ear.)

The Dude: *does his impression of the last part of everyone of Doozer’s rhymes* Me, you can’t stop… I FIGHT JUST LIKE TYSON… and as stupid as Goldy Lox.

Doozer: No dawg, it goes like this… Me, you can’t stop… I am stronger than Tyson… and smarter than Spock!!!

The Dude: But I just fought like Tyson, I mean, I bit the guys ear off.

Doozer: Alright, I will give you credit for that. Wait, don’t get too cocky, somebody is coming here.

Yojin Musahiri: Very, very slowly. Whoever it is must be trying to sneak over here and surprise us, but we are ready to take on anything. I wonder who this is, he is unbelievably slow.

Doozer: Oh, I know who it is, no reason to be worried one bit. It’s just that crybaby who ran off on us once we were held up by three guys with guns, Dusty.

Dusty: I am not a crybaby. Yeah, I did run away thought, didn’t I?

The Dude: Yes, you did you cowardly poop head eating guy person thingy mabobber. Yeah, take that you… and… stuff like that!!!

Doozer: I will translate for you… f(censored)ck you, you f(censored)cking piece of sh(censored)t. Take that you flamer and fudge packer and stuff like that.

Dusty: I liked it a lot better how The Dude said it, you used to many bad words and stuff. That made me feel bad.

Yojin Musahiri: I think that was his initial intention to do.

Dusty: That, I didn’t understand one, but okay.

The Dude: Alright, so what are we going to do know, Doozer?

Doozer: You know what? I am not exactly sure, but I am guessing that we don’t have much more time left for this show. So, we better do something quickly.

Yojin Musahiri: Hey, you want to scare the old people over there sh(censored)t-less.

Doozer: Now that sounds like fun. I am ready for that anyday.

(Doozer, The Dude, Yojin Musahiri, and Dusty all start to walk towards an old couple. Doozer then hides behind a trash can, Yojin hides in the bushes, The Dude hides in front of a wall, and if you think that is bad, the 500 pound Dusty hides behind a thin street light. As they walk by The Dude, the old man drops money at his feet. The Dude picks it up not knowing that it came from pity, and smiles. As they walk by Dusty the old woman takes a picture. While she did, Dusty forgot that he was supposed to hide, so he came out and smiled. As they walked by Yojin, he started to ruffle the bushes. The old man and woman stopped in front of the bushes and looked it. As they looked, Doozer started walking up behind them. Then, Yojin began to distract their attention towards the bush that he was in so that Doozer could surprise them.)

Yojin Musahiri: The old man in front of the bush is gay. The woman is a dike.

Old Man: What did you say sunny bush?

Old Woman: How rude of a bush to say.

Yojin Musahiri: *kind of shocked by the reaction, most people run away* I said the old man is a flaming fudge packer damn it and the woman likes to join in on lesbian orgies.

Old Man: That’s about enough of that sunny bush. *goes to kick Yojin, who is in the bush, but Yojin grabs his leg.*

(As this is happening, Doozer walks up behind the old man and gives him a wedgie so big that he is picking him up and down by his underwear. While he is doing that The Dude jumps on the old womans back and she falls to the cement on her face. Doozer lets go of the old mans underwear, but shortly after the old man has a heart attack and Doozer, The Dude, Yojin, and Dusty all run away as fast as they can. All four of them hop into the limousine and Doozer tells the limousine driver to head towards the arena as "Boyz ‘N The Hood" goes off the air.)

Doozer: Well, I don’t know about you guys, but doing that to those old people sure made me feel rather big.

Yojin Musahiri: I especially liked it when the old man got a heart attack. Oh, good work Dude on jumping on the old ladies back and forcing her to fall to the cement face first with authority smashing her skull into the ground. That was great, but you didn’t have such a great hiding spot, I’ll tell you that truthfully.

The Dude: Well, I am just so good that I do not need a good hiding spot. Hell, I don’t even need to hide. People just see how retarded I look and don’t think I can do any harm, but that and being retarded are the only things that I can do.

Dusty: True that, true that. What about my job at smiling for the camera? I thought I had a nice smile on.

Doozer: Oh, will you just shut up, I can’t believe you man. Are you stupid or just plain old retarded? I mean, did the doctors ever find out what was wrong with you?

Dusty: *shaking his head* No, it could have been the fact that I did eat my fair share of paint chips as a kid. Or, the fact that I was born during an earthquake. Or, the fact that my mommy always used to bounce me on her knee in a room that had a very low ceiling. But, those are the only possibilities.

Doozer: Damn, you are stupid.

Director: Well, the next show is almost ready to be cut. Yup, this is our last show of the night, "Talkin’ Shit." Yeah, we have permission to use that word without it being censored only if we are referring to the name of the show. Please, Doozer, do not abuse your privilege.

Doozer: Don’t worry, buddy old pal, I’m going to Dooze it, then abuse it.

(The limousine arrives at the arena and Doozer, Dusty, The Dude, and Yojin Musahiri all hop out of the limousine and enter the arena. Dusty walks over to where the food is. The Dude heads towards the bathroom and Yojin heads with Doozer towards the gorilla position.)

Doozer: Hello, people at home watching the first episode of "Talkin’ Shit." This is myself and Yojin Musahiri, on of my two managers and we are just making our way towards the gorilla position. From there, we head down to the ring where I will cut my promo for my number one contendership to the Hardcore Championship, a well respected belt here in the Dream Wrestling Federation.

Yojin Musahiri: Yes, and like he said I am Yojin Musahiri, one of his two managers and probably the better one since The Dude is a retard.

(Suddenly, the lights go out. Then, the color of red starts to flicker about the stands as "Ain’t Nuthin’ but a G Thang" by Dr. Dre plays as Doozer and Yojin Musahiri make their way down to the ring. Doozer is wearing a T-shirt labeled "I’m Down with Dre" and over that T-shirt is a Nomar Garciaparra Jersey. He is also wearing an official Boston Red Sox baseball hat. Yojin is wearing a tuxedo. As Doozer and Yojin get into the ring, the words "Bad Asses In Black" appear on the mat and as Doozer turns his hat into a backwards position, red fireworks blast out of each turnbuckle. Doozer and Yojin both grab mics.)

Doozer: Doozer is in the houuuuuuuuse and he’s ready to DO some DAMAGE and RAISE some HELL!!! That’s right, you’re looking at The Innovation of Devastation, The Master of Disaster, The Sultan of Slam, The Potentate of Piledrivers, The Dictator of DDTs, The Ruler of The Ring, The King of Kablam, The Man, The Myth, The Legend, The One, The Only… THE DOOZE!!!

Yojin Musahiri: And I am The Guru of Grappling, Yojin Musahiri. Now, you all ask why am I down here with one of DWF’s big superstars, Doozer? Well, if you didn’t watch DTV the other day, then you wouldn’t know. Doozer awarded me the position of being his second manager. So, since his first manager, The Dude is busy in the bathroom, I am out here with Doozer.

Pat Riot: Well, Doozer is very lucky to have such a retired wrestler as Yojin to be his co-manager. I think that because of this, Doozer will not only win the number one contendership to the Hardcore Title, but he will go on to win the Hardcore Title!!!

Johnny D: Oh, who are you kidding? Yojin Musahiri is a washed up old wrestler who didn’t get anywhere in the DWF, so he is trying to hop onto to Doozer’s ride to fame and take some credit for it. Doozer will probably go to the top or could go to the top without Yojin by his side slowing him down.

Pat Riot: I couldn’t disagree with you more. I mean, Yojin Musahiri was a great wrestler for the short time that he was here. He won all, if not mostly all, but I am pretty sure all of his matches and he had a lot of matches. When he was active, he fought at least one match a night, sometimes two or three and won them. He was a great wrestler and before he retired, he was ranked 8th or 9th in the Dream Wrestling Federation rankings and that is when they were messed up and still had retired people on them.

Doozer: Alright, now for all of you who are watching this at home, you can also watch this on MTV. Yes, this is being aired as the third show of the series, Doozer Television or DTV, and this shows name is "Talkin’ Shit."

Yojin Musahiri: I think you should be focusing on the match while you are out here at least, Doozer.

Doozer: Good call Yoshi.

Yojin Musahiri: I would like it if you didn’t call me that while I am out here as your manager.

Doozer: No problemo, Yoman. *Yojin shakes his head* Now, I have a match this upcoming Sunday, if I win it then I will get my chance at some well-respected gold here in the Dream Wrestling Federation. After all, the Hardcore Championship is the third biggest belt here in the DWF. Yes, once I win this upcoming match, which I will win and once I win that Hardcore Title, I will be the best damn Hardcore Champion that the DWF has ever seen. Yeah, unlike the past, I will not hand down my belt to somebody after a month or so, I did that with the Novice Title twice, I didn’t with the tag team titles when I held them by myself and I will not with this Hardcore Championship either. I have came to an educated guess that I will probably be facing the Big Shot when I do get my Hardcore Championship shot. I have beaten this man twice in tag team competition and I will prove to him that I can also kick his ass just as easily in singles competition. Although, I do hold much respect for the Big Sh(censored)t… Wait a minute, who am I kidding. I do not hold much respect, if any, for him because every time I have been in the ring with him, I have beaten his ass. Plus, he cost me my People’s Championship when I faced ‘TFT’ Kyle Kalligan. Yeah, don’t think that I have forgotten Big Sh(censored)t because I have not. I had that match won, in the bag. As a matter of fact, I was climbing the top rope to hand out the Pesky Poll, my finishing maneuver, when you decided to poke your ugly head where it didn’t need to be, no not my ass, the match. So, you pretty much took away my People’s Title, and I will take away your Hardcore Title. Even if I am not facing you for that title, I know how much you love it and I am going to win it. If I do win it, I might give you a shot at it if your lucky, just to torture you. And then, if somehow I decide or am forced to defend it against you, if I beat you, then you will never get another Hardcore Title shot as long as I am the champion, which if I have anything to say about it, which I do, will be a long, long time.

Yojin Musahiri: See, that is exactly why I decided to go along with managing him, he is fierce and knows when to get serious when on the other hand, he can be a lot of fun and just literally kick the sh(censored)t out of somebody while wearing a smile on his face. Jose Santiago, do not think for a moment that you can beat him. Haiz, we aren’t even worrying about you *forms an evil grin*, so we have this match in… the… bag!!!

Pat Riot: Whoa, I wonder what he meant by not even worrying about Haiz, then he grinned. Haiz is a very fine wrestler, so I wonder why they aren’t worrying about him.

Johnny D: Well, they obviously have something going on there, don’t be such a moron. Anyway, I think that they should worry a lot about Jose Santiago, he is a good wrestler who just came back to the DWF from being a great wrestler here a while ago. I think Jose’s chances of being the number one contender for that title are very good.

Doozer: Oh, I wonder why Garrett Kent hasn’t decided to show his face in the Dream Wrestling Federation again? I think he realized this… He might be the greatness… But, I am truly great.

Yojin Musahiri: Doozer, you are not great.

Doozer: No, you are right… I am perfect.

Yojin Musahiri: No, no you aren’t perfect either.

Doozer: Oh yeah, I know what I am now… I am… Perfectly Great!!!

Yojin Musahiri: Ding, ding, ding… WE HAVE A WINNER!!!

Doozer: You god damn right you have a winner, a winner of that match coming up this Sunday. I’m gonna be kicking ass and taking names and there is only two things that either Jose or Haiz can do about it… Jack Sh(censored) and take it like a little biatch!!! Now, after I win some more matches and kick some more ass and prove to people that they can’t beat me, I will warn you right now Cro that you will be the next. For what? Oh, that is simple. You are next for me to Dooze and Abuse!!!

Pat Riot: Wow, very strong words coming out of each of these people inside the ring. I am wondering if this sign of cockiness from both men in there might cost Doozer this match. I mean, that could very well happen. Doozer could go into this match thinking that it wasn’t going to be a match, just a, as Doozer would say, good old fashion passionate ass-whooping handed by The Dooze.

Doozer: So, you two should come into that match on Sunday to get ready for a Top Quality Grade "A" ass-whooping complements of The Dooze. Not, only will it be that, but it will be a good old fashion passionate ass-whooping!!!

Pat Riot: Haha, I told you that he would say it. I told you. I’m good, I’m great, everybody likes me.

Johnny D: You are not good, you are not great, and I don’t like you. And anyway, did I say that he wouldn’t say that. So why do you act like you proved me wrong?

Pat Riot: I’m retarded.

Doozer: Well, I don’t really have much more to talk about. So, I am going to sum all of this up for the viewers that might have just tuned in and are wondering what the hell I have been talking about because they know that when I talk, it is something important. Haiz, Jose, be ready and prepared to loose. Big Shot, be ready for an ass-kicking when I face you down the road for the Hardcore Title. And… to all those kick ass Red Sox Fans… Keep Cool and Keep Kicking Ass. ‘Cause winning might not be everything… BUT LOSING SUCKS ASS!!! Oh, one more thing… once I win the Hardcore Title… there is going to be total anarchy in that division… Anarchy means no rules whatsoever, everybody makes up their own rules, well I’ll be the one making up the rules. And, in my point of view, just like my old wrestling buddies… ANARCHY IS BUSINESS, AND BUSINESS IS GOOD!!!

Yojin Musahiri: *as Doozer starts to leave the ring* Hey, aren’t you forgetting to bust a rhyme for all of us, we have been waiting.

Doozer: Damn, almost forgot, thanks for reminding me…
So, Haiz and Jose
This sure as hell ain’t Croquet
To take a page out of Slim’s book
This is just gonna be
A good old fashion
Passionate ass whooping
And you’re gonna get your shoes, watch, and your hat tooken
You just gotta remember one thing
I am the Ruler of the Ring
And when it comes down to Kablaming
I am the god damn King
I won’t let up when the bell dings
Cause when I’m done with you, you’ll quit wrestling
And you’ll start to sing
And I’ll just keep on doing my thing
Kicking ass
Like it’s nothing
Breaking you like glass
And your ass
I’ll be busting
Me, you don’t sass
Cause I’m lusting
You better run fast
Cause I’ll be hustling
So all in all
Remember this or you’ll fall
Cause compared to me
Your skills are very small
Like I always say
I will not stop
I am stronger than Tyson
And smarter than Spock!!!

ON