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Journal Entry #11 in "Doozer's Journal!!!" |
**Warning**: I have Dusty's Permission to use Dusty in this Journal Entry!!! I have Dusty's Permission to use 'The Dark and Demented' Dusty in this roleplay. Cast For Journal Entry(Their Name Will Be Their Color for this Entry): Dear Journal, (-{2}-) Shortly after that, each of us sang our own lyrics to the beat of Shawn Michael’s entrance music. Following directly after the singing, we set up a whether report that would be given by Extremist. Well, The Dude didn’t call him Extremist. Actually, if I can remember the name correctly, it happened to be "Spanky McTremist." Anyway, he asked myself, who was hanging by a string dressed up as God, what the and I quote, "God damn whether is going to be like?" No, I am wrong. He asked, "What the hell is the whether going to be like?" Then, myself as God hesitated and he continued by saying, "God damn it, just hurry up." Now, I’m not a very religious person, but I know that saying "God Damn it" directly to God himself is not a good thing. (-{2}-) (-{3}-) Well, The Dude came onto the scene dressed up like The Devil and said, "Hello, my name is Oddball and I’m the Devil… I bet you didn’t know I was so stupid." Directly after that, The Dude took a microphone and tried to shove it up his ass as if it were a dildo. Well, this, along with the vulgar language, didn’t go down well with the censorship people. Thus, they hired security guards to bombard onto the scene and carry us off before The Dude could actually anally probe himself! What kind of human beings are they? Like anybody with any decency in them would just come onto a stage because someone was paying them money and remove a guy who was anally probing himself with a microphone as well as remove his friends. I just don’t know who people think they are these days. Everybody just walks around like they are a damn hot shot or something. (-{3}-) (-{4}-) Well, I guess I started to get a little off the subject, so I’ll just stop there. Now I will go back to telling you how my day turned out. Like I stated before, Doozer Television did officially come back to television! It actually came back and aired on MTV, just like it had when it was first started up by myself, The Dude, Yojin Musahiri, Dusty, Dazz, Genecide, and Wreck. Well, my day started off like any normal day. I took a shower and all that good stuff in the morning that includes: making breakfast, eating the breakfast that you made, sitting down in your chair Maxing and Relaxing, and watching some television. At that time, I felt really bored, so I actually walked up to the phone to give Dusty a ring. Yet, when I happened to be just a couple feet from the phone, it rang. I waited for the first two rings before I answered it though. (-{4}-) (-{5}-) Why did I do that? Well, I have this rule that if you answer within the first two rings and it is someone you have a thing for calling, then you might just seem desperate for a phone call from them or something. Yet, it didn’t turn out being someone that I had a thing for. It happened to be Mr. Salami himself! Yes, my old agent. My heart skipped a beat to hear his familiar voice over the phone. No. Not because I am weird or anything, but because whenever he calls something good has happened. See, Mr. Salami has a thing about telling somebody a type of news. He either tells you the bad news first, then the good news or he only tells you good news. If there happens to be bad news, he usually won’t tell you. Anyway, the conversation between myself and Mr. Salami went like the following. (-{5}-) :{=-(Mr.)-=}:Mr. Salami:{=-(Salami)-=}: I heard the eagerness in his voice as he replied. "Hello Doozer, this is Mr. Salami!" :{=-(The)-=}:Doozer>:{=-(Dooze)-=}: Knowing that it turned out to be Mr. Salami on the phone, I actually looked forward and paid attention to the conversation. "The Big S-A-L to the A-M-I!" I love saying that whenever he calls or talks to me. "Well, what’s on your mind today?" :{=-(Mr.)-=}:Mr. Salami:{=-(Salami)-=}: It wasn’t too long of a wait before Mr. Salami replied. "Well, I have some great news!" He hesitated for a moment, then before I could get a ‘what is it’ in the conversation, he continued. "Music Television, MTV, just called me and told me how their ratings were going down the drain lately." :{=-(The)-=}:Doozer:{=-(Dooze)-=}: With those few words, my ears perked up and eyes grew wide. "Does this mean what I think it means, Mr. Salami?" :{=-(Mr.)-=}:Mr. Salami:{=-(Salami)-=}: I couldn’t see him, but I knew he was nodding his head up and down. "You better believe it, Doozer." He paused for a moment of silence. He loves to make me wait for something big. It took a minute or so before he knew I was going to crack, so he continued. "They want Doozer Television back on the air for MTV!" :{=-(The)-=}:Doozer:{=-(Dooze)-=}: I was as excited as a little schoolgirl, but not really. "Awesome dude, I’ll go get Dusty and The Dude and meet you at the old studio!" (-{7}-) While running towards Dusty’s house, I hit a little switch on the side of my garage and opened up the garage doors. As the doors slowly opened, a large figure started to form from behind them. Speak of the devil himself, it was Dusty! Well, Dusty is only the devil when his eye-patch is over his left eye and it wasn’t at this time. Yet, how could Dusty know that I wanted to get him and take him over to the studio? I don’t know the answer to this and this happens to be the second time Dusty has done something remarkable like this. Yet, I don’t really want to get into that freaky subject right now, I have bigger and better fish to fry. Well, I doubt I could get any bigger fish than Dusty to fry, but definitely better. (-{7}-) (-{8}-) The fish to fry, for one thing, weren’t retarded, fat, or taken over by Satan. Alright, there I go again getting of the subject. I just stood there for a long three minutes totally dumfounded at the fact that Dusty was already in my garage before I could even tell him to come over to my house. Yet, I snapped out of remembering that Doozer Television would be back on the air soon. So, I motioned to Dusty to get his big, fat ass in the car and as he sat in the passenger seat, I hopped into the drivers seat of my awesome Ford Escape. It has a yellow exterior with a tanned, leather interior. I started up my Ford Escape, put the pedal down to the floor, and sped my way out of my driveway and onto the road. (-{8}-) (-{9}-) Dusty happened to be wearing a different pair of clothes than he wears everyday. He must have also known that it was a special occasion, but how? Still, I do not want to touch that subject with a ten foot poll, so back to the day. Dusty happened to be wearing a long sleeved, rather baggy shirt that was colored orange with black stripes. He also wore a pair of rather baggy khakis. Within the blink of an eye, the two of us were off and on the road. I turned on the radio and switched the channel over to 105.1 T.O.S. It is a rock and roll station. While driving along in the Ford Escape, I decided to make a friendly conversation with my friend, Dusty. It makes sense to have a friendly conversation with your friends doesn’t it? Or is it just me? (-{9}-) :{=-(Fat)-=}:Dusty:{=-(Retarded)-=}: Dusty seemed like he had to think for quite a while about such a straight-forward question. "Well, I have been doing some stuff." Dusty hesitated for a moment or two and thought some more about what kind of ‘stuff’ that he did. "Oh yeah; I watched some television!" :{=-(The)-=}:Doozer:{=-(Dooze)-=}: I shook my head, but couldn’t help the smile that stretched from ear to ear. "You know that you are a total retard, don’t you?" :{=-(Dumb)-=}:Dusty:{=-(Stupid)-=}: Dusty thought long and hard about this question. I don’t think he even knows what ‘retarded’ means. "I like cheese." :{=-(The)-=}:Doozer:{=-(Dooze)-=}: I really wanted to insult him big-time, but before I could something suddenly struck me. "Damn it, we have to pick up The Dude!" (-{11}-) At the large, wooden front door, I used the gold-plated knocker three times and in the blink of an eye, Dude’s maid appeared at the door. Why does The Dude have a maid? Well, she’s really not a maid, we just call her that because she takes care of The Dude. She was sent by Shady Acres Mental Hospital when The Dude broke out of it and eventually agreed to have some kind of supervision over himself as long as he could live in his house. Thus, the caretaker that we call the maid answered the door like always. She recognized my sexy face and immediately let me in, while slamming the door in Dusty’s face because she didn’t even know that the huge monster of a man was there. Yet, do you blame her? (-{11}-) (-{12}-) If you were a lady, which you might be, would you be looking at Dusty or myself? Yeah; I thought so… You better have said me! Anyway, I walked in the house to see The Dude sitting lazily on his red and blue couch that had ‘Red Sox Rule’ embroidered in black words on the seat of it. The Dude was laying back watching some MTV. So, without hesitation, I told The Dude all about how Doozer Television was going to be back on MTV and in a heartbeat he was up and running towards my Ford Escape. Yet, I don’t blame him either. My Ford Escape is almost as sexy as I am. In just one short minute, the three of us were all loaded in the car. Dusty sat in the passenger seat, The Dude sat in the back seat, and I sat in the drivers seat. I started up the car and sped off towards the old studio. (-{12}-) (-{13}-) I turned on the radio again and we were officially cruising. Amazingly, we arrived at the studio in no time flat. I mean; if you were to read a five page picture book, which Dusty still can’t do, then you would’ve missed the ride. Sure, I was driving insanely fast, but I was still surprised when we pulled up to the studio so quickly. The studio looked exactly like it had when Doozer Television was a part of my normal, everyday life. The sign just below the roof, directly over the double doors, was still there too and read out in big, bold, red, white, and blue letters ‘DTV’. I hopped out of the drivers seat and gave the keys to the guy who parks your car. He seemed trustable, so I gave them with no shade of hesitance. Then, I turned around and walked towards the door. I stood directly outside the door and waited there for The Dude and Dusty. (-{13}-) (-{14}-) The two of them eventually made their way to the doors and asked me why I stood outside the door. Well, I wasn’t honest with you when I said I was just waited for The Dude and Dusty. Actually, the stupid doors were locked. So, the three of us waited rather impatiently playing little children’s games like ‘I spy.’ Eventually, I spotted a stretched limousine heading our way. The limousine pulled into the parking lot and the tall, sturdy chauffeur stepped outside the drivers seat and walked down to the door at the end of the car. He opened it and out came Mr. Salami. With a deep sigh of relief, I walked casually up to Mr. Salami and greeted him. I told him about the doors being locked and he acted as if he didn’t know that they would be. Just as I threw a little fit and kicked a nearby garbage can, Mr. Salami laughed hysterically, pulled out a handful of keys, and unlocked the door. (-{14}-) (-{15}-) Well, I would love to tell you what happened after that, but I’ll leave that for tomorrow. At this time, I am totally wiped out from a long and hard day. Also, I would like to say a word or two on my match this Sunday Night Slaughter. This Sunday, I am facing the man who took away my Hardcore Title and exchanged it for the Extreme Title. This Sunday, I face the man whose stable took the stable championships from my stable. This Sunday, I face the man who almost ended my career and injured me for a good amount of time. This Sunday, I face Mike Extreme. Well, Mike, you’ve been gone for a while and you come back still holding you little undefeated in the Dream Wrestling Federation record. Well, I’m not only gonna Dooze You and Abuse You, but I’m gonna break that record of yours like glass! Well, I am done for tonight. I am going to go and hit the hay, which means ‘go to bed’ for all your dumb-asses! (-{15}-)
Doozer 
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