This is an official Role-play From Your Lightweight Champion!
6/7/01
Journal Entry #16 in "Doozer's Journal!!!"

(-{2}-) What can you do when your doors are locked with over ten different types of locks and your windows are cemented in? Well, you can’t do much at all and that is why we didn’t on Thursday. Yet, since I failed to enter a journal entry, I will tell you how it all went down. I woke up early on the mid-summers Thursday morning and just looked around to see if Mr. Salami visited during the night. Yet, I found nothing to hint that he might have. All I saw that had changed were the locks on the doors. There were so many damn locks that they were even on the inside of the door as well as the outside. So, after seeing that the door was all locked up, I looked over at the windows on the wall to my right. (-{2}-)

(-{3}-) The windows didn’t even appear to be there, because the cement that filled them blended nicely with the shade of the paint that covered up the brick walls. I looked over to my left to see that all those windows were all cemented. Then, I looked over my shoulder the walls behind me to see that those windows were also cemented. So, I decided that I would just go back to sleep. Then, later that day, around three in the afternoon, I woke up. Legend Inc. and Dusty were already up and walking and the dwarf was screeching and banging around in his little cage. Inc. was frantically looking around for something to bust through the door with while Dusty was just looking for anything. I saw Dusty looking under stuff like little blankets and such. Then, I looked back over to Legend who picked up a cement block, which was probably used as a little extra detail on a set, and he hurled it towards the door. (-{3}-)

(-{4}-) The cement block wasn’t a total failure, but it wasn’t a success either. The block dented in the door very nicely. I was surprised to see Legend Inc. freaking out like this. I have never seen him lose his temper before. Yet, since neither of the two men were succeeding in their desperate ways of getting out of the studio, I decided that I would go to sleep another time. It wasn’t too much longer, about nine o’clock at night, and I was woken up by the sound of a screaming man. Obviously, Legend Inc. was getting rather bored so he probably decided to entertain himself. Entertaining himself meant to sick The Not So Angry But Fairly Pissed Off Dwarf on Dusty. As sick and inhumane as it might sound, it is very funny to watch a small dwarf chase around a big oaf. It’s like how elephants are scared of mice. (-{4}-)

(-{5}-) Well, Dusty is scared of a dwarf. Dusty is obviously the elephant. Anyway, I watched The Pissed Off Dwarf chase around Dusty while screaming at the top of his lungs and I got a good laugh out. This went on forever. Neither Dusty or the dwarf were in any shape to run for too long, so before you knew it, the dwarf was crawling after Dusty who was also crawling away. Yet, Dusty finally got the upper hand by luring the dwarf into the cage and locking it tight. I didn’t know that Dusty could think up something smart until that very day, but he did. It was almost like when you know you are getting chased by something that could kill you if it catches you, and you run faster than you have ever ran before. Trust me, I know from experience. (-{5}-)

(-{6}-) I was walking over to my friends house with my head hanging down to the ground just watching the ground move under my feet. I was walking with the friends of whose house we were going to along with my small cousin. Well, I walked for a second or two more, when I heard this growling sound. It didn’t really click that I was hearing a growling sound, so I kept on walking. Then, the growling sound became a lot louder and it shocked me. With the shock, my head lifted high in a jolt and I looked around for whatever had scared me. It didn’t take too long and I was staring in the eyes of a Rottwiler. With his black coat of hair and his brownish spots, he looked like a lean, mean, fighting machine. I stared directly in his deep brown eyes and he stared back with the look of pure evil in his eyes. (-{6}-)

(-{7}-) I saw him growl some more and his razor sharp, white teeth gleamed out from his curled up lips. I knew I was knee high in shit at that very moment and I knew my ‘fight’ or ‘flight’ responses would come to very soon. Luckily, my responses are smart and they gave me the ‘flight’ response. So, after the first bark, I turned and ran as fast as my eleven year old legs would carry me. I ran faster than ever. The Rottwiler had jolted up with my first movement and he decided that he would run after me. Yet, it was only two more steps that I made at full speed when I heard the dog let out a cry as it’s collar choked him back. I looked over, panting, in the direction of my friend and he was in total awe. (-{7}-)

(-{8}-) I knew by his expression that he couldn’t believe what he just saw, and I couldn’t believe what just happened to me. My friend then told me that the Rottwiler was only about an inch away from taking a mouthful out of my ass. That scared me even more, but to this very day, I brag about it to friends. Anyway, Dusty had been triggered by the ‘flight’ response when he was running away from The Pissed Off Dwarf, but after too much running, Dusty’s ‘fight’ response decided to take action. Yet, he didn’t fight with his fists, he fought with his mind. This really confused me because I thought that Dusty had lost his mind a long time ago. Yet, he managed to outsmart a dwarf whose only words are grunts and groans. You do have to have at least the IQ of 4 to grunt and groan, so that means that Dusty has an IQ well above 4. (-{8}-)

(-{9}-) I know, I can’t believe it myself, but it must be true. Then, with all the excitement gone and flushed down the toilet and with it being eleven at night, I decided to sleep. It was seven in the morning when I woke up yesterday. Legend, Dusty, and the dwarf were still asleep because they had probably spent the whole night doing stuff and trying to have a little fun. Yet, I didn’t care about having fun at this time, I just wanted to get out of the damn studio and as long as I wasn’t able to do that, I decided that I would just sleep. This time was different though. I didn’t want to sleep anymore. I had slept most of the day before and I wasn’t the least bit tired. So, yesterday, I decided that I would walk around and see what I could see and do what I could do. (-{9}-)

(-{10}-) Yet, there wasn’t much to see or do. First, I walked over to the recording room. There were microphones and all that cool stuff there as well as desks that were just infested with buttons. I didn’t want to screw anything up just incase somebody would come in that day and fine me for money, so I didn’t touch the buttons. The barrier between the main part of the studio, which the three others were currently sleeping in at that time, and the recording room was simply a glass wall. It was a soundproof glass wall to be exact. Well, there was nothing more than the things I described above to look at in the studio, so I moved on to the next room. The next room happened to be the very same room that I interviewed people in to see who I would chose to be apart of my show, ‘Lightning Strikes.’ (-{10}-)

(-{11}-) That was when I hid under the alias of ‘The Striking Lightning’ Scott Lavigne. The room was a small, square room that looked dark and dreary. It was definitely not a room that you would like to be trapped inside while there was a thunderstorm taking place. I mean; I like thunderstorms and all, but this room is just creepy enough to turn them into something bad. Well, I moved out of that room just as quickly as I moved in. I didn’t want to spend an extra second in that room. So, I moved on to the next. It was a bathroom. I was really excited to see that we had a bathroom. I guess we could have found it a lot earlier, but we were too busy trying to escape rather than trying to be clean. Well, after finding the bathroom, I took a shower and all that good stuff. (-{11}-)

(-{12}-) The sound of my shower woke up Legend, Dusty, and the dwarf. So, after my shower, Legend got in and took one. After Legend, Dusty hopped in and took a shower. Then, after Dusty’s shower, we let the Pissed Off Dwarf go and take a shower. After we were all clean and showered, there was no chance that we could get back to sleep so we decided to do something. Now, even though it was the smartest idea in the world, it passed time. What did we do? We played two on two basketball. There were plenty of trashcans in the studio, so we just took two and set each of them up on opposite walls. I picked the teams and I chose the seven foot monster, Dusty, to be on my team. It was a smart choice if you think about it. Well, Dusty has no basketball skills, but he is big. (-{12}-)

(-{13}-) Come to think of it, Dusty is in the same boat as Shaquille O’neal. They are both big, but have no basketball skills. If Shaquille was as tall as Michael Jordan, then Shaq would suck ass. I know that a lot of you won’t agree with me on this subject, but I feel like I am telling the truth. Anyway, we played basketball and the game went a little something like the following. Dusty and I really dominated the whole game. I mean; it was pretty much a two on one handicap match with Dusty and me facing against Legend Inc. It’s not like Inc. had a partner. The Pissed Off Dwarf just took up space on the court, and not much at that. Yet, when Dusty and I got ahead by ten points, Legend and the dwarf started to set up plays. (-{13}-)

(-{14}-) Then, the very next play, Inc. took the ball out and just as he did, The Pissed Off Dwarf screamed and charged at full speed towards Dusty. Dusty ran, but tripped over his own feet after only two steps. The Pissed Off Dwarf, from there, jumped on Dusty’s ankles and gave him a vicious, yet funny, ANKLE BITER! I looked at my own teammate getting beaten up by such a small creature and laughed as Legend Inc. sneaked by me to score the first points for his team. That took my happy face and turned it into a mean face. I am too competitive to let one man and a dwarf score on me and a huge guy. Yet, after the vicious ankle biter attack, Dusty’s ankle started to bleed and we had to stop playing. After that, there was absolutely nothing to do. (-{14}-)

(-{15}-) Legend and I both reprimanded the Pissed Off Dwarf and were determined to get him back into his cage, but it wouldn’t be easy. We both knew that it wouldn’t be easy, so we decided that it would be best if the two of us double teamed him. I went towards the dwarf’s left and Legend to his right. Then, we both charged towards the small figure at the same time and at the last moment, the dwarf ducked, and Inc. and I collided head first in mid-air. I got up, really pissed off because of my head hurting so badly, and took a swing at Legend. He ducked and punched me directly in the ribcage. I backed up two feet and then got ready to punch him and punch him hard. I cocked back my right arm quickly and as I did, I nailed Dusty in the nose with my elbow. (-{15}-)

(-{16}-) This elbow to the nose sent Dusty stumbling back a step or two, then fall right down on his ass. I watched the whole thing and I knew Legend was watching it too. After it was done and Dusty was knocked out cold on the floor, I looked over to Inc. He was also looking at me. It was another minute and then the two of us burst out laughing. Yet, the pain for Dusty wasn’t over just then. The Pissed Off Dwarf got so mad that he bent the small, steel bars that made up his cage and he escaped. Then, with his eyes beet red and his nostrils flared, he looked across the room for the person who would pay the price for keeping him locked up. He stared at me, then to Legend, and lastly, to Dusty. (-{16}-)

(-{17}-) The Pissed Off Dwarf’s veins started to bulge out of his head and he held out his arms and lifted his face to the ceiling and let out an ear cringing scream. Then, the dwarf charged at Dusty. Dusty was just coming back to consciousness at this point and was just starting to open his eyes. Dusty’s first sight was the dwarf charging at him and his last painless moment was that directly before the dwarf jumped on Dusty’s ankle. It was the same ankle that the dwarf had made bleed just hours before. It was sick and almost made me puke, but I actually saw a small sliver of Dusty’s skin being devoured by the dwarf. With that, Legend and I decided that the dwarf had gone too far and could not be trusted while we were helpless at night. So, the two of us grabbed him by his small legs while he was still preoccupied with Dusty and we threw him across the room. (-{17}-)

(-{18}-) He flew through the air for what seemed to be quite a long time and I saw something miraculous about to happen. I held up my arms like the officials at a football game do when a team scores a touchdown. Legend Inc. saw the same thing that was about to happen. Then, with both of us jumping up and down and waiting, it finally happened. The dwarf’s little body flew so far that it went directly through one of the trashcans that I had hung up to be a basketball hoop and it went in without hitting the rim. Legend and I started to celebrate and as we did, I could see Dusty out of the corner of my eyes. Dusty was also celebrating. He couldn’t stand on his ankle, but he was clapping his hands in his retarded way. I did the same motion that Tiger Woods does when he makes an awesome put and Inc. did the Sammy Sosa thing when he hits a homerun. (-{18}-)

(-{19}-) Well, I’m sorry but I have to go for now. I am still in the studio sitting down with my laptop in front of me right now and I don’t have much time left on my hands right at this time. If you didn't know, I no longer have my United States Title, the bastard to my left does. Legend Inc. defeated me for it. Yet, I do have my Lightweight Title. Anyway, it is about one o’clock in the afternoon and I won’t be able to tell you what has happened so far today until the day is finally over. So, just to inform you, Mr. Journal or Mr. Reader person, I have a match against three DWF Superstars in a Six Man Tag Match. My partners are T and the fat ass laying down beside me, Dusty. The three people of whom I face, are Chainz, Educator, and Oddball. (-{19}-)

(-{20}-) Chainz is now being managed by the man who I looked up to from the start of my career in the Dream Wrestling Federation, Dazz. Educator, in my mind, won't be hard to defeat and then there is Oddball. Oddball is a man of whom I have beaten at least twice already. He is a Hall of Famer and I will proceed to kick his ass in our upcoming match. I don't see why one of my partners, T, follows Oddball's every word. Oddball is a loser and if you follow a loser, then that makes you a loser too. Actually, it makes you even a bigger loser than the loser that you are following. Plus, I think Dusty, with exception to his fatness and his slowness, will be a great accet to my team of three wrestlers. Together, I don't think there is any threesome in DWF who can bring us down. Yet, I have to go for now, but I will be back later to tell you about today and until then… (-{20}-)