Writings  Faq  Questions  Contact  Visual Art  Audio  Links


The Last Pac-Man on the Island  

    Originally there were four Pac-Mans. Four upright consoles in painted wooden cabinets. They were salvaged by the navy after they sank a floating casino that thought it was in international waters and failed to bribe appropriately.
    The machines, being encased in wood, surfaced before the bodies, water foaming off of the yellow face.
    The buoyant boxes were netted and paddled in by cadets riding lifeboats.  Upon returning to the island the mysterious cargo was taken to El Palacio del Pueblo and presented to El Presidente.  
    "¿Pac-man?" he read around his cigar.
    When they were plugged in only one of them worked.  El Presidente had the working unit brought to his office.  He dismissed his adjutants and, when alone, studied the curious box.  He paced before it, hands behind his back, eying it warily, as if it might strike.  It began to beep cheery tinny music.  A yellow smile similar to the one painted on the side of the cabinet ran across the video screen, chased by four differently colored shapes.  The yellow face swallowed a large white dot and suddenly the tables turned.  The shapes which he now recognized as ghosts, turned blue with fright and fled.
    Intrigued, he toggled the red k¡nob that protruded from the console--- nada.
    The red slot in the foot of the machine began to flash red: 25. 25.
    ¡Caramba!
    He removed from his desk a cigar box full of yanqui dinero.
    The large coin with the curly haired man fit into the slot.  The box began to sing and the face of El Presidente lit up as if confronting a Christmas tree.  The box was a game!
    He played long into the night, until his coins ran out.  He scored 200,000 points.
    He was so proud that he couldn't help but show it off when the head Rusqui came through for inspection.
    "What is it?" the diplomat asked thickly.
    "It's a game, señor."
    "Da?  I want it."
    El Presidente frowned through his beard.  "¿Why don't you take one of the
broken ones?"
    The Rusqui said:  "There are more?"
<>    El Presidente had commissioned the other three to the lab for analysis and, if possible, repair.  But when he and the visiting politico went to the basement del Palacio the machines were not to be found.
    "¡Qué lastima!"
    Two of them would eventually be recovered, summarily cleaned  up and shipped out, to much grumbling from El Presidente.  They were found in a barren cane field, a foot deep in mud.  Next to them lay the bodies of two men with holes in the backs of their necks.  The machines had been on their way to the island's vast black market but had been stopped.
    One Pac-Man made it all the way, arriving in the the hands of the operator of the largest casino on the island.  Peróns was frequented almost exclusively by the wealthy smugglers who made their living sneaking people off of the island.  The smugglers kept the existence of their club a secret, even from El Presidente.
    The problem with "El Paquero" or "El Pacombre," as the machine would come to be affectionately called, was that it was still broken.
    To fix this Peron contracted Constenable, the finest mechanic on the island.  Constenable was legendary for his ability to maintain classic cars from Los Estados Unidos with parts from dissimilar Yugoslavian autos.
    "Of course I can fix it," Constenable said.
    The first thing that he repaired was the power source, which had shorted out when the original, floating casino sank.  He used the electrical cord and other parts from the club's television.  The human smugglers complained until Perón shot them his look.  A smuggler brought in a new television soon enough anyway.
    After Constenable disabled the coin slot the smugglers took turns playing the game; one man to El Paquero while the others watched.  They sweated when the colored  ghosts closed in and cheered when El Pacombre took the magic pill and ate them in a row. They cried when the little yellow mouth turned inside-out, frowning, and died.  It was a beautiful experience. They played until the monitor exploded, which happened pretty quickly.  The makeshift power source from the TV was insufficient and over-amped.  When this happened Peron and the smugglers pulled Constenable of out his bed at gunpoint and had him fix the machine.  He used from the television to replace the screen.  This was difficult because the original screen was a CRT monitor.  But with a lot of paper clips, solder and wires from the dash of his own Studebaker, Constenable was able to make it work.  It was a miracle, but the game could now only be played in monochrome.  It was difficult to tell the ghosts apart, but it was good enough until the smugglers could bring in a color TV to  replace it.<>    This kept the mechanic alive for nearly a year until the main circuit board burnt out because the system was still overloaded.  There was nothing Constenable could do to fix that.

    So the last Pac-Man on the island sits silently in the basement of Peróns club.  All the electronics, the monitor, the joystick, have been gutted  out.  The smugglers use the empty cabinet as a mini-bar.  They set their drinks on it when they play cards.


This story originally appeared in LiteLit.