Peterborough, ON – As imagined right here at this site in October (“Mike Harris is giving away books because he can!”), My Ontario Millennium Memento, a book produced by Mike Harris’ common sense government for all of Ontario’s students, is being rejected by ungrateful students in Peterborough. MPP Gary Stewart was the reluctant recipient of fifty of the wasteful publications, yesterday. The 160-page piece of crap was mass-produced by the Ministry of Culture, Recreation and Political Propaganda at the astounding cost of $2.5 million.
“We are absolutely disgusted with this “gift” from the government,” complained Mahatma Coat, a student at Peterborough District High School. “In a couple of years, I will be forced to shell out many dollars to continue my education thanks to Harris’ politics. This book is a total waste of money. He can shove it where the sun don’t shine!”
Stewart lied as he declared his annoyance, “The response received has been overwhelmingly positive in the rest of Ontario. I am dismayed by this turn of events.”
“He shouldn’t be dismayed, he should be dismembered!” Coat retorted.
The 160-page document, 56 of which are blank, contains an assortment of student-made articles and artwork as well as a personal message from the Premier.
“I wish he had put as much thought into this project as he did money,” Coat added. “After all, the millennium is still a year away!”
