virtual

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Internet a virtual sin-bin according to magazine

Rome- Now you can sin without leaving the comfort of your own home according to the Italian news weekly Famiglia Cristiana.

“Virtual adultery is just asah sinful asah dah real thingah”, Father Antonio Sciortino professed broken-Englishly in this week’s edition. “Don’tah blame mia for thisah story, I wasah coerced to write itah by St. Isidore (dougzone 1999 06 14), himselfah. He readah the letter from thatah womanah in Varese and he toldah mia to say those thingsah.”

When contacted in his office, St Isidore was quick to defend his decision.

“Hey, I didn’t ask for this job, you know. Last year I was just picked out of nowhere to be the Patron Saint of the Internet after being dead for a millennium and a half. It’s been a quiet year, except for a couple of viruses but I got to thinking, ‘Hey, Izzy, you better get to doing something or He could have you put back on the shelf like He did with Chris (St. Christopher, former Patron Saint of travelers).

Isidore went on to try to justify his opinion.

“Hey, there are people out there that are wasting plenty of time gambling, buying crap on eBay, or looking at porn. Somewhere, somehow, something has to give. Don’t get me wrong; I enjoy those nude photos of Britney Spears as much as the next Patron Saint so I drew the line at virtual adultery. Kind of has a nice ring to it, too, don’t you think?”

Meanwhile, Father Sciortino is reaping the benefits of Isidore’s interference.

“We wereah thinking that the footballer cover wasah gonna sellah a whole bunchah magazines thisah weekah because ofah Euro 2000. But, holy moly, wasah I everah wrongah. I’ll be askingah Isidore to poke hisah nose into myah business a more oftenah, fromah now onah.”

Varese: Virtual- Adultery Capital

"Look darling! Isn't she cute? Can I keep her?"