TITLE changes
AUTHOR ophelia
EMAIL ophelia_rd@yahoo.com
DISTRIBUTION do not take without permission
RATING m
PART 7/?
FEEDBACK yes please!!!
PREVIOUS PARTS http://au.oocities.com/dra_gon_fly_er
Changes
"Angel?" Lindsey barely recognized his own voice, when he finally gathered the courage to speak. "There's nothing to be sorry about." He bent forwards to nuzzle his face in the vampire's dark head. "If anything it's me who..."
A single tear made its way past his tightly shut eyelids.
They sat like this for a very long time; hurting, grieving, drawing comfort of the other ones nearness. In hindsight Lindsey couldn't believe the things he'd done in order to destroy Angel, how much he had hated him at times and how much more often he'd simply wished for them to be as close as they were at this moment.
"What happened then?" He whispered close to the vampire's ear. "How did you managed to get yourself involved with all that many people?"
A cool hand gently kneaded Lindsey's calve.
Hmmm, that was nice. Without him realizing it, the ex lawyer wrapped himself more tightly around his former nemesis, working the tense muscles of his back all the while whispering soothing nuisance into the curve of his neck.
He could feel the other man's back shudder against him and immediately felt bad about adding to his pain by asking curious questions. A slightly trembling hand reached for his own and Lindsey noticed in surprised that Angel seemed to take quite a few unneeded breaths.
"For weeks I couldn't get myself to go to Sunnydale. I thought, if I just didn't go, if I just wouldn't visit her grave..., I though that maybe one day, she'd just walk though my door, laugh at me and tell me that it'd all been some stupid mistake..."
Oh Angel... Lindsey held him even tighter and brushed a hesitant kiss on the soft patch of skin right behind his ear. Geez, he so much wanted to crawl into him, wanted to comfort him from the inside, wanted to replace all his grieving with something new, something that wasn't based on contrition and pain.
"But she never came back?" He then questioned him softly knowing the answer beforehand.
"No." Sad red-rimmed eyes searched out his face. "She never did."
His heart stopped one beat or two, by the raw unmasked pain reflected in the vampire's dark orbs. And to Lindsey it almost seemed as though his most secret dream had finally come true and he'd been given the one person, the one lover?, the one friend he'd been longing for all of his adult life.
"Just when I decided I couldn't take it anymore Dawn introduced herself to my life - she and Spike." His voice trailed of and his eyes took on a new shade of pain.
"I didn't know about Dawn, never bothered to find out about the how and why the love of my life left me behind..."
For a second Lin wondered why the dark-haired man wouldn't know about his sweetheart's baby-sister, but the thought left him as quickly and quietly as it had popped up leaving him to refocus on Angel once again. Lindsey felt seriously bad for making Angel relive the most agonizing moments of his life. "It's okay, my sweet, you don't have to tell me if it hurts you so much..." he whispered as the shaking increased.
"No..." Angel turned around, so he could face his sweet mortal. "...I have to..., I want to..." He leaned into Lindsey, heavily, gathering strength from his loving embrace. "They gave her a human form and altered the memories of a whole city."
Duh-uh?
His expression made it clear, that Angel had lost him.
"All that we went away; Wesley, Cordelia, myself, even her father never knew about Dawn... Her blood held the power to bring down the walls between dimensions..."
"...and Buffy died protecting her?" Lindsey solemnly finished the sentence for him.
"Yes, she gave her life so this world would continue to exist - so Dawn would continue to exist... I still don't know all of what's happened that night and I think I don't really want to know... But when Dawn showed up here, my youngest and most favorite childe in tow... Something happened... It was like meeting Buffy... Meeting Spike all over again..."
Lindsey's head snapped up - Spike? William?
He finally managed to fill in the blanks.
William was Spike.
AKA Drusilla's Spike.
AKA William the bloody.
He gulped, trying to swallow the lump stuck in his throat.
In his time at Wolfram & Hart he'd heart his fair share about Angel's youngest childe.
A loner, a vicious, ruthless killing machine - although, looking at the sweet, cuddly fangbear Lindsey couldn't quite believe that this sweet boy was same master vampire, Drusilla had never tired of portraying in the darkest and bloodiest of colors.
Shock still evident, Lindsey met Angel's pained gaze: "How..., why...?"