It's Ann(e) Squared!

Ann(e) Squared circa 1990:
Ann Elaine McKannan as Blake (left); Anne Collins Smith as Avon (right)
Songs we performed at REVELcon:
The Blake's Seven March
(to the tune of the Mickey Mouse Club March)
originally printed in the fanzine GATEWAY TO TIME
by Anne Collins Smith
(lively)
Who's the leader of the band that sets the people free?
A-V-O-N-O-R-B-L-A-K-E?
Vila! Jenna! Tarrant! Tell us who it's gonna be!
A-V-O-N-O-R-B-L-A-K-E?
Blake's the one! (No, he's not!)
Blake's the one! (No, he's not!)
Forever let us follow him or die--
DIE DIE DIE!
Watch tonight, see them fighting for supremacy
A-V-O-N-O-R-B-L-A-K-E?
(slow and sad)
Blake's the one--Blake's the one
Forever let us follow him or die. . . .
Now it's time to see who might survive the shooting spree--
A-V-O--Only one left!
N-O-R--Are they really dead?
B-L-A-K-E.
The Ballad of a Zine Writer
by Ann McKannan
from STANDARD BY SEVERAL #2
Tune: Sixteen Tons
Chorus:
Sixteen pages, and what d'ya get?
A little bit longer, the plot's not right yet
St. Peter, don't call me, for Heaven won't lure--
I owe my soul to a zine editor.
Chorus
I wrote the first draft, I thought it was fine.
The actors were cool, the story all mine.
The editor said, "You've got a great plot--
If you just would fix this one little spot."
Chorus
So I tried it again, I thought it would fly.
I killed off some people, and let others lie.
The editor said, "It's just about right--
Now how 'bout letting your characters fight?"
Chorus
My third effort's in, I think I'm in pain.
My fingers are dead, I can't use my brain.
St. Peter, make them like it or I might die--
I just don't think I can make one more try.
I got it back with trembling and fear.
What's this? They liked it?! I think that I'll cheer.
But there's a P.S.: while they think that it's great--
"Could you please write a sequel at a later date?"
Final Chorus:
AARRGH! Sixteen pages, and what d'ya get,
The story gets longer, it's not done yet.
St. Peter, don't you call me, for I can't go--
I'll have to stick around to reap what I sow!
The Ballad of Captain Janeway
by Anne Collins Smith
Tune: My Darling Clementine
In the Badlands, chasing madmen
Led by Mister Chakotay
Went a starship, on a far trip
Led by Katharine Janeway
Chorus:
Oh my captain, oh my captain, oh my Captain Kate Janeway
Are you lost and gone forever?
Delta Quadrant's where you'll stay
Brought to romp with the Ocampa
Many light-years must they roam,
Got a fair shake from the Caretake
But they still can't get back home
Chorus
She's got Tuvok, got a Klingon,
She's got Neelix, and his blonde.
She's got Harry, she's got Paris
And a doc who gets turned on.
Chorus
She can follow in Kirk's footsteps,
She kicks butt when she gets hacked.
There's two ways that she is better:
She's got hair--and she can act
Final Chorus:
Oh my captain, oh my captain, oh my Captain Kate Janeway
Are you lost and gone forever?
Just till Paramount says nay.
Yesterday's Enterprise
by Ann Elaine McKannan
Tune: original
There's a tall ship sailing with white wings spread
And the captain is standing proud
The bridge is on fire and his first mate dead
Yet still he's standing proud
Oh, let history remember the Enterprise
The wind carries his last words now
And the mists of time roll forward
And the years go dancing down
There's a battlecruiser sailing into Hell
The captain is standing proud
The planes are raining doom and death
Yet his words go ringing loud
Let History remember the Enterprise
Let us make a good name proud
And the mists of time go rolling on
And the years go passing on
There's a starship sailing on a dream of time
Her captain is standing proud
Then time rolls back and the world turns dark
And the bridge is full of doubt
Oh for time to set the universe right
Then Jean-Luc cries aloud
Let us give our lives for history's sake
Let her name now ring out proud
And for Yar's good name and the death she'll take
They have cleared away the clouds.
On sea, in sky, through space she flies
Her name is always proud
For as long as men hold honor bright
Let Enterprise's name sing loud
May it always be so
Until Memory goes
Let the Enterprise fly free and proud
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