You Know You're an
S.C.A. Teen When...
...you know EXACTLY what it's like to hug someone who is wearing full armor.
...you have more S.C.A. homework than school homework, and you'd rather be doing the
S.C.A. homework.
...you hate doing any kind of research, but you jump at a chance to learn more about your
persona.
...you carry a role of duct tape in your backpack / purse / etc.
...you can think of the coolest pranks to play on people and they all involve duct tape.
...your parents won't ground you to punish you. They just refuse to sign your fight waiver
forms.
...people no longer look at you weird when you and your friend talk about holding people
for ransom and assasinating people.
...you spend the days between events counting down until the next event.
...you refuse to get a job because it might interfere with spur-of-the-moment S.C.A. plans or you might not get the weekend off when there is that huge war planned.
That one is true for Dustin
...people are no longer impressed by how many clowns can fit in those little cars at the
circus. They've seen the way you pack.
...you role up your sleeve after archery practice to find a huge bruise on your arm where
the string kept hitting. The first thing you say is "WOW! Look at all the neat colors!" And
spend the rest of the day with your sleeve rolled up bragging about it.
...you've aced every English essay you've ever written by basing the story on an S.C.A.
members persona story. (Not a good thing to do though.).
...people ask how your weekend was and you reply: "Not so good. I was assasinated
THREE diffrent times!".
...you can be at an event for 72 hours and get less than five hours a night and still be
bouncing around like you're on a sugar high first thing every morning.
...you can name every type of weapon and every piece of armor and you're not even old
enough to fight yet.
...your persona's boyfriend, best-friend, adoptive parents etc. All live in diffrent shires.
...a letter addressed to your persona arrives at your house and your family knows exactly
who it's for.
...you respond better to any one of your persona names than you do to your mundane
name. (eg. a person could call your mundane name 5 times without getting an answer,
and
they're standing right beside you. But the moment someone calls your persona's name
from across the grounds, you immediatly look up).
...you'd rather be fighting and making armor than doing embroidery, and your a girl.
...you spend hours at the video store looking for movies LIKE "First Knight" and "Romeo
and Juliet.
...you're watching the new "Romeo and Juliet" with your friend, and you get hit over the
head with couch cusions because you won't shut up about the lack of period garb, and
how
the old one was better.
...your little brother has had stuff throwen at him (from more than one tent) when he's
played his bag pipes first thing in the morning. And he's actually been hit by said flying
object more than once.
...your little brother has had stuff thrown at him from many a tent when he's played his
bag
pipes at 10 am. (Yeah, I can TELL who was up late last night drinking).
...your friends no longer think you're crazy when you tell them your father killed a
king/knight.
...(DON'T DO THIS!) When crossing the border with older SCA members, just for the
heck of it, when you get to the gate, you lean into the front seat and ask the person on the
passanger side if you can have your short sword back now..
...if you had a choice between Disney Land and a border war, you'd choose the border
war.
...you figure that if you save all your allowance every week, you'd have just enough to go
to one event per month. (transporation, site fees, food etc.).
...after paying for something at the store, without thinking you put the change inside your
shirt (girls...).
...you can (and/or) have used the excuse about leaving your wallet in your other tunic.
...you quit rugby (or any other school sport) and dedicate your life to Celtic Dance..
...people have threatened to tape your mouth shut when you watch a medieval movie,
because you won't shut up about how the lack of proper period garb is ruining the movie.
...you are dissapointed because you can find the shirts that say "Life is *Sports*, The rest
is just details" but you can't find one that says something about sword fighting.
...you see a t-shirt that says "Eat, Sleep, and Breathe Golf" And wish that it said "Eat,
Sleep, and Breathe SCA".
...you plan your summer job around any and all summer SCA events.
...if your parents aren't going to an event, and they won't drive you, you threaten to walk.
...you can warn your ex-boyfriend to stay away from the archery field and mean it... and
it's not because your aim sucks.
...you've had four diffrent knights offer to beat your ex on the field.
...you're excited about getting your 8th Grade Socail Studies text book, because it's ALL
medieval studies.
...you sign up to peer tutor the Grade 8 social studies class because of the medieval
studies unit.
...you TEACH the grade 8 medieval studies unit... and your only in 11th grade.
...the only thing you regret is not being born 500 years earlier.
...this is your favorite part of my website.
...the only time you've ever wanted to learn to waltz is at an event.
...you're so used to doing the celtic waltz, you no longer get dizzy from all the spinning.
...you've showen up at work in full armor.
...you've twisted your ankle dancing at an event or fighter practice, and were having so
much fun you tried to keep going, even with all the pain.
...after you twist your ankle, you almost break into tears when you find out the next thing
the dance master plans to teach that night is Highland Dancing.
...you act like an idiot lip syncing to Celin Dion's Titanic song, and mocking it with
overly
dramatic hand gestures, and nobody cares because they're all doing it too.
...You bought the titanic soundtrack and got upset when you found out that the music
from
the scene wher Jack and Rose are dancing in first class isn't there.
...your teacher asks the class to explain what they did over summer holidays, and your
turn is filled with knights in shining armor, wenches, wars, tournaments, and the time
that
one of the kitchen wenches got into a whipping cream fight with the king.
...your teacher calls the school psychiatrist because of said story.
...you've worn your garb to the school halloween dance.
...you asked your parents to buy you hard heeled shoes so you can learn riverdance, and
they felt your forehead to see if you were sick.
...your SCA older brother is scottish, and you hand him a pile of name books, he reads
the
titles, gives you a dirtly look and hands back the one titled "Irish First, Family, and Place
Names.
...your school stage band plays a celtic song during a assembly /concert and your friends
are positve that you'll get up and dance.
...your smoker friend, who's also in the SCA, has been at the Smoke Pit at school and
asked to borrow someone's "magic flame" aquiring many worried looks various people as
they had him/her their lighter.
...you figure your town would be perfect if it had a Medieval Times restaurant.
...you walked into Safeway in full gar, guys in kilts, looking for cloves, and been asked
by
an employee if "this is a hold up"
...people have asked if you could help them with their drama class projects of Romeo and
Juliet, by lending them your garb.
...you're delighted to get coal for Christmas.
...you're walking down the street with your mundane friends, and a guy in a kilt walks by,
and your first reaction is a wolf whistle. And a "Hey! sexy legs!"
...You've yelled "Hey! Nice Tights!" At a guy.
...your parents won't ground you from an event, because then they can't go.
...you plan your summer job so you can earn enough money for armor or the big event
just
before school starts.
...(on your resume or application form) the adult references you use, and the "skills
learned" that you list for your summer job are all SCA related.
...your mom pulls out 6 of your drawings and tells you to submit them for the cover of the
monthly newsletter.
...you skip the biggest (mundane) bash of the year to finish court garb for the next event
...whenever you see magazines like mademoselle you wish it were 'medieval maiden' or
somthing to that effect
...you only have limited clothing storage space, and that's devoted to your armor.
...at lunch you offer to serve your friends
...you don't cut your bread with knives anymore
...(for those who are accustomed to long gowns:) when running upstairs in mundane
clothing, you find yourself holding up your t-shirt or your pants.
...you slip occasionally, and answer your teachers with "yes milord/milady'.
...you've been knowen to bow/curtsey to persons of the opposite/mundne sex.
...you've made 2 suits of armour you're not old enough to use.
...people in your shire have sca stories older than you
...Note: Don't do this!!---when crossing the Canada/USA border with older members tell
the border guardes "you can have your draft doggers back now"
...for fighters crossing the border, when questioned by guards about rattan weapons "oh!
that's not a sword, it's a bong man"
...you brag to your parents about being beaten by a 200lb. man with a big stick.
...you sit around with your friends and offer to show them a "chain-mail waffle-bruise" if
they can show you how to sew those "medieval dress thingies". (a tunic)
...When a book falls from the locker above yours... and you call "GOOD!" when it hits
you
on the head.
...you've seen more tall hairy men than the bigfoot sightings crew?
...your the only one (girl) at camp who can build a campfire in under 2 minutes?
...you store your money in your bodice.
...you carry a knife in your boot.
...you know more people with long beards than the elves at the Santa employment
agency.
...have 4 mothers and counting
...you know exactly how many people will fit in a tent during a blizzard, windstorm ect.
...when you hear the song "born in the u.s.a." and sing "born in the s.c.a."
...you know what a "spang" is.
...You've ever given the guy in the bridge tollbooth your favor just to see his reaction.
...You've been in a car with three VERY LARGE kilted Scotsmen.
...The first tuba player is also the MacDougall clan leader. (This causes some strange
looks on the band bus when everybody's changing out of their uniforms if the contest is
right before an event.)
...You plan to teach medieval dancing at a youth church meeting- assuming there's no
SCA
stuff going on that night.
...In spite of Olivia Hussey's fake crying during _Romeo and Juliet_ you watch it over
and
over drooling because the garb is awesome- NOT the honeymoon part, like your other
friends think.
..A possible project for _Romeo and Juliet_ is making a dress that Juliet would've worn.
You've got it made, because you already have one.
...You wear a piece of your clan tartan to school in your back pocket.
...The principal notices you and several fellow MacDougalls doing this, and insists that
you
not anymore because he thinks it's a gang thing.
...On the band trip, you and the Tuba Boy wander around the historic district of
Vancouver
trying to find a Goodwill. No luck, but you do find two other people in garb, several
stores
full of tartans and and the perfect gift for the current clan leader.
...SCA Lesson #2: The first time you try cooking in garb, DO NOT do it when you're
making a feast for 120 people.
...It's a good thing that you stopped going out with your ex, because now you're both
MacDougalls and that would be wrong.
...The feast of St. Servatius features a large morel, nicknamed by the kitchen wenches
"Shroom of Doom."
...You wrote about your extremely strange weekends in the class journal that gets passed
around and now people ask if you'd smoked the Shroom of Doom or what, because
nobody
can ACTUALLY have weird things like that happen.
...Safety pins are period, and you can prove it.
...You've frightened all the customers and staff of a large restaurant by walking in with
four HUGE men in great kilts and eight high school students, all wearing garb.
...You've spent twenty minutes in the bathroom of said restaurant, trying to get your
bodice to lace right (it's not your fault that you lost the grommets and have to use safety
pins), all the while getting strange looks from other patrons.
...You've worn garb to a school dance.
...You've drooled over a merchant's chainmail dress and sworn to wear IT to a school
dance, if only you could afford it.
...You know how to use duct tape to make a cotehardie. (There is an actual way to do
this-
it's for making a Perfectly Fitted Bodice.)
..You joined band to MAKE your parents buy you a flute so that you could play Irish jigs.
...You've thought about attaching a small axe head to your flute.
...You had to stop watching that Merlin TV special because the bad costuming was
driving
you insane.
...The staff at another restaurant is accustomed to the strange Dark Agers coming in on
Thursday nights, and have extra breadsticks ready.
..You're despairing over whether to a) stay at home all summer and be ready to go if any
SCA stuff comes up or b) work at the awesome Amazon Pickle Works and Dry Goods
Store and get a possible discount on all sorts of garbing stuff. (I love Davenport.) Oh, the
agony!
...You give up on formal music training and work on Irish jigs during bandlessons.
...You ridicule your guy friends because you can start a fire faster and better than they
can, and *you* don't have to use lighter fluid.
...You and your friends are going to college together. Instead of going home and getting a
job during the summer, you'll go the Pennsic and hire yourselves out as servants and
minstrels to get money.
...You and other SCAdian friends started dancing Trench War during the Sadie Hawkins
dance, and you took great joy in whapping people over the head with your sleeves.
...People ask you what your favorite band is and you answer, without thinking, "the
Chieftains."
...You're panicking- you need more money because *the Chieftains are coming to
Chicago!!!* (June 20, 1998. 40 bucks a ticket, I think. The Drovers and other bands are
gonna be there too.)
...Your friend plays Crowley's Reel (with MY Chieftains CD) so often that her pet bird,
Tamlon, has actually developed a dance to go along with it. I am not making this up.
...You've been stuck in someone's kilt from not being careful while dancing Trench War.
From what I hear, not a pleasant experience.
...You know of someone who can read the entire Book of Kells, untranslated.
...You say something about how screwed up Gaelic spelling is. A friend consoles you
with,
"Hey, have you ever tried WELSH?"
...You've ever seen a tall, skinny Swede wearing a Scottish great kilt.
...You and several friends take walks wearing garb just to see what kind of reactions
you'll
get.
