Weakness

An essay by Chris Scroggins

What is Weakness? Is it a physical inability to perform certain actions? Is is a flaw in your genetical makeup? Is it an inability to concentrate, understand, or focus? Is is hesitation? Is is irresponsibility? What is Weakness? What is the purpose of Weakness? What is the purpose of Hate? Anger? Fear? Greed? ...What is the purpose of Life...existence? Why do we exist? Is it to obtain happiness, compainionship? But what's the point if it's all going to end eventually? What about God? Do we live on Earth so that we might live with God? What do we do after that? Why do we want to live in Heaven? Why do we believe so earnestly? Is it so we won't be weak? Is Weakness Uncertainty? Man is Uncertain. Therefore, he creates certainty. But is Uncertainty Weakness? What is the point of knowing the truth? Why continue when it will all end anyway? Is there a purpose to anything? We exist to perfect outselves. But why? Why do we want to be perfect when we will all die? When we're perfect, we're immortal.....just like God. This is why we believe. This is why we exist....immortality. But, Why do we want to live forever? What about boredom? Is boredom a Weakness? What is Weakness? Perfection is impossible, because we cannot exist without Weakness. Without Weakness, there is no existence. But why exist? Is there more to life than mere existence? If God is flawless, why is man Weak? Man wants to be Perfect...Man wants to be God. We don't want to live with God, we want to become God. We are all selfish. Is Selfishness a Weakness? What about Shame? We lie when we feel shame. But why do we feel shame? Is it because we fear the disaproval of others? Why do we want others to be pleased with us? Is it Pride? Is Pride a Weakness? We want to be strong, and we want others to fear us...respect us...we want others to recognize us. Because, thee is no existence without Weakness. Without another self, we are Perfect, because there can be no flaw which we can recognize. Lonliness is complete Freedom. Freedom is when we cease to exist. Freedom has no Weakness. But what is Weakness? What is Pain? What is Fear? Why must we be weak, hurt, and scared? Why do we try to expel these emotions? Is is because we don't want to face out Weakness? Or is it because we don't want to feel ashamed in the eyes of others? Weakness is self-denial. Weakness is self-deceit. Weakness is Mindlessness. Every person hates themself. If a person cannot love themself, they cannot love another. Yet, why do we still love? I love you, I love him, I love her. You love me. We love each other. They love you. They love me. But what about Myself? Do I love Myself? Am I too weak to love Myself? I cannot love you...I Hate Myself! Look at me...I'm irresponsible, lazy, selfish, perverted... Why do I go on living? Is is to find Love? Why should I search for Love if it cannot be found. I can't love myself unless I'm perfect. But if I'm perfect, I won't exist. What is Love? Why do we want Happiness? Satisfaction? Pleasure? Love...? Is Love a Weakness? It can't be...how can I love myself when I'm such a wreck. Wouldn't that be Selfish? ...Is selfishness wrong? Isn't the purpose of life to perfect the self? Perfection is Selfish. There is nothing else. Why do we deny that we're Selfish? .........It's because we know, once we love ourselves, we will be Perfect, and we will cease to exist. We will become one with God, with Nothing. We misplace love in others, and deny selfishness. We help others, hurt others, to hide our Shame. Without others, we are Nothing. Without others, we are One. I am One. Without You and You and You and You.....I will become God. So...What about Death? When you die, what happens? Do you cease to exist? Do you return to Heaven? Does man have a soul? What is the purpose of a Soul? Is it so we can be confident? We give oursleves souls so we won't fear Death. Is your Soul a Weakness? We give ourselves souls so we won't be Selfish. We fear immortality. We fear Nothingness. We fear Heaven. We fear...Ourselves. That is why we are many, and not One. That is why we must have others. That is why we 'love' others. We are selfish, but wish not to be. This is All that is True. There is nothing else. We are One but many. Man is God. God is Man. Life is Nothing. Death is Nothing. Nothing is Everything. What is the purpose of Everything? There is no purpose...No Purpose. Because the purpose is Nothing. That is all...