07/30/01 - I found a great quote: "Expect nothing; live frugally on surprise." ~ Alice Walker That's really good. I like it. It would make life a lot easier to not have great expectations. Sometimes it seems like a good precaution to expect the worst, but I think it makes more sense (and is gentler to your being) to expect nothing at all. That way you aren't putting any negative vibes out there. I tend to be a bit superstitious too. I'm afraid negative thoughts might will something into existance. I have superstitions about positive thoughts as well. Like maybe things too good to be true aren't. Really, sometimes I encounter things that I'm pretty sure are real, but I'm afraid to trust myself. It's like they are just too good to be true. Denial sets in sometimes. Sometimes I put things in the back of my mind to deal with when it becomes important. I have to make a consious effort to do this though. I would rather be open, have all feelings out in the open. But, it's not always practical to do this. As of July 22nd 2001, my second divorce has been final for four years. That's how long I've been practicing expecting nothing. As of July 26th there has been a puppy living in my midst unbeknownst to me, until now. I don't know what to do about this. It's The Kid again. He's the bravest of all of them. The puppy is a pit bull. Should I be surprised at that? I'm a little scared. I didn't want to go here. I don't know what to do. I haven't given permission. He understands how I feel. I don't know how long we will be here and where we might go if we leave. I didn't want to deal with something like this. The Kid understands how I feel. We are in quiet stand off. See? You can't say you would like to live by surprise and then freak out over the surprises you come by. That would be like being only a little bit free. I think living frugally on surprise is going to take some practice ... I think I'd like to give it a try. |
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| Dream A Little Dream ... |