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Title: One Sweet Day
Author: Drusilla
Email: Drus1lla@hotmail.com
Rating: PG, I guess.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters used within this story, probably with the 
exception of Iain and Brighid, cuz I made them up.  But Buffy and Angel don't belong to 
me, they belong to the evil Joss monster, the WB, FOX, and whoever else owns a piece 
of them.  The song is One Sweet Day by Mariah Carey & Boyz II Men, I don't own them 
either!
Author's Notes: Sorry guys, back with the songs.  They fit, what can I say?  This one is 
from Angel's POV.  It's a letter to Buffy following Giles' death.  Don't look at me like 
that, I mentioned in the first story of this series that Giles wasn't with them anymore!
Summary: Brighid delves into her parents' past.


Sorry I never told you
All I wanted to say
And now it's too late to hold you
'Cause you've flown away
So far away


My Darling Buffy,

It's been so long since I saw you last.  Five long years without you.  Yet I find myself 
back here in Sunnydale, but I know this time you won't follow me home.  It's not really 
home, no place without you can be.  I wish I were here for some other reason. I wish I 
wasn't here to mourn Giles, but I am.  Because he's gone.  Your watcher, your mentor, 
your father.

As I gazed at you in the cemetery tonight, all I wanted was to take you into my arms and 
help ease your pain.  But I can't, because if I do I won't be able to leave.  And I have to 
go.  I can't stay.  Because you still deserve more than what I can give.

Even though I know it will happen to everyone who is close to me someday, the news of 
Giles' death shocked me more than I thought possible.  I've always known that I'd have 
to outlive you all, but the knowledge doesn't make the loss any easier.  I dread the day 
when Cordelia answers the phone, and then tells me you're dead.  But I know that 
somehow she won't have to.  For when you go, I will know.  And when that day comes, I 
will watch
the sun rise.


Never had I imagined
Living without your smile
Feeling and knowing you hear me
It keeps me alive
Alive


I know the funeral was held after sunset for my benefit as well as Spike's.  Thank you for 
letting me pay my respects to him.  Giles, who accepted me as your companion, even 
after all I had done to him.  As I watched the look of anguish in your eyes, the tears 
streaming down your face, I knew you had been with him in his final moments.  I also 
knew you blamed yourself.

Cordelia told me the story ... that he saved your life.  That you were fighting to keep 
others safe, that if it hadn't been for Giles ... we would be burying you.  That you held 
him as he spoke his last words.  That you, and Willow and Xander, are together carrying 
out your father's final requests.

Like I said before, it was a shock when Willow called.  It was one of the things we just 
never thought we'd hear.  I held Cordelia as she cried for him, or maybe she held me, I'm 
not actually sure.  Neither one of us believed his loss would affect us as deeply as it did.  
We should've known better.  Like you, Giles made a lasting impression on everyone he 
met.


And I know you're shining down on me from heaven
Like so many friends we've lost along the way
And I know eventually we'll be together
One sweet day
Eventually we'll sing in heaven


Your eyes were haunted as you looked up at me, as your gaze met mine.  I looked at you, 
I knew what you were thinking, feeling.  I wanted it too.  But I can't have you, our past 
has proven that.  And then I saw him.  My rival for your affection, Riley Finn.  He is 
everything that I want for you.  He can give you what I can't, and I hate him for it.

Our eyes stay locked to one another, each of us ignoring the presence of the other people 
there.  Riley looks up, and from the look on his face he knows exactly who I am.  He 
knows the part I played in your life.  Can he see what you mean to me?  Do I still mean 
anything to you?

But today is not about me, I cannot give in to what my heart wants.  I am here to honor 
the man who has always been there for you.  Who accepted me back into his family, even 
after I almost destroyed it.  I will help to avenge his death.  I will track down the 
monsters that took him away from you Buffy.  They will not live another night.


Darling I never showed you
Assumed you'd always be there
And I took your presence for granted
But I always cared
And I miss the love we shared


It's as if the city has taken the time to grieve for one of its unknown heroes.  The skies 
themselves have opened and are weeping his loss.  I cannot even begin to say how sorry I 
am.  If I could take his place I would.

Willow approached me after the funeral.  We said our hellos through tears and sadness. 
And she gave me a letter from Giles, one I have yet to read.  It sounds silly, but I actually 
fear it.  A small piece of parchment containing the thoughts of a close friend, isn't 
something that I should be afraid of.  Maybe I'm afraid he'll tell me to stay away from 
you, or that he died hating me.  I don't know what it is.

Willow also told me that you need me.  That I should come home to you.  I told her I 
couldn't.  She told me I was stubborn.  I promised her I'd track down his killers, that he 
would be avenged.  I don't know how she took it.  Maybe she knew I'd say that.  Maybe I 
told her so that she would keep you inside, so that you won't go out and take stupid 
chances in your grief.

What troubled me most about my talk with her was a look that crossed her face as she 
turned away from me.  It's a look I've come to know well, for I see it on Cordelia often 
enough.  It is unmistakable guilt.  They want to tell me something, I can feel it.  They just 
won't.  Whatever it is, I'm sure it's to do with you.  Perhaps that is why they say nothing. 
Maybe they're afraid of how either of us would react at whatever their tale is.

I swear I thought I heard you call for me as I started to go.  Maybe it was just wishful 
thinking.  I'm sitting here in my office, writing this letter that I will not send. Still trying 
to convince myself that I did the right thing.  If it's so right, why do I question it?  I 
should've said something to you, anything.  But now there's nothing more to say.

Love,
Angel


And I know you're shining down on me from heaven
Like so many friends we've lost along the way
And I know eventually we'll be together
One sweet day
Eventually we'll sing in heaven


"Why do you want to know about Giles?" Iain's voice was suspicious.  As it should be, 
he knows how curious I get.

"I was reading one of Daddy's letters to mom.  He mentioned Giles.  I've heard about 
him, even Spike says he was great."

"You're babbling," Iain informed me.  His gaze caught mine, and I swear it's as if he 
reads my mind every time he does that.  And somehow, he knows what I'm looking for.  
"I'm not going to tell you about Riley Finn.  And I still don't want you to see his son."

I don't know where it's coming from, but suddenly I'm angry.  "You can't tell me what 
to do Iain, you're not my father!"

"Neither Mom, nor Dad would want you around him either.  For once, just do as you're 
told Brighid.  Stay away from him!"  And then he left.  I haven't seen him this angry in a 
long time.  I haven't found anything in your diaries yet Mom.  What is so horrible that I 
can't know it?

I took down one of Daddy's photo albums after Iain left and started flipping through it. I 
turned a page and there was Giles.  A man I've heard so much about, but never got to 
meet. He's smiling up at Iain, who's being lifted into the air.  It looks as though this was 
taken right before he died, for there are no more of him.


Although the sun will never shine the same
I'll always look to a brighter day
Lord I know when I lay me down to sleep
You will always listen as I pray
And I know you're shining down on me from heaven
Like so many friends we've lost along the way
And I know eventually we'll be together 
One sweet day
Eventually we'll sing in heaven


Daddy referred to Giles as your mentor and father, Mom.  I wish that all of you were 
here, I could use guidance right now.  I want to know the truth, I want to know what 
happened. But I'm afraid of what I'll find out.  Will knowing what happened between 
you and Riley's father, make me hate him?  He's not his father, and I obviously feel 
something for him.

Maybe Iain's right, maybe I'm just being rebellious again.  I don't know though.  I 
should get to bed, I have a job tomorrow.  My first paying job as a 'real' photographer.  
It's a family photograph.  I hope I do well.  I hope you're watching over me, and that I'm 
making you proud.  I love you both.  I miss you both.


And I know you're shining down on me from heaven
Like so many friends we've lost along the way
And I know eventually we'll be together
One sweet day
Eventually we'll sing in heaven


I love you Mom and Daddy.
Love,
Brighid


Sorry I never told you
All I wanted to say