Chapter 5:

I’m Here With My Confession, Got Nothin’ To Hide No More

I sighed and grinned as Alex came through the door of Acting II with Brian. The two of them had actually begun to hit it off which was kind of funny to see actually. Brian's so quiet all the time and Alex is just, well, Alex.

"Howie! Hey man! Tell Rok he'd look awesome if he went platinum blond like me!" Alex exclaimed, coming over. Yes, his hair was yet another color, but there was no hat over it today, he just looked too proud of it to cover it with anything.

"If y'all even come near me with peroxide," Brian warned, backing off, a twinkle in his eyes.

I walked over to take my seat. I didn't want to get reprimanded for running interference between Brian and Alex, like times in the past. If Alex had too much attention paid to him, it was just bad.

A few more minutes passed before I heard the bell sound and watched Alex and Brian rush toward their seats like first graders afraid of getting caught, even though our instructor was nowhere in sight. Brian sat down heavily and let out a breath and then turned to Alex who was still attempting to jump desks in order to get where he needed to be. I smiled to myself and turned my attention back to Brian who was pretending to be Alex's cheerleader.

A loud popping sound rang out behind me. I turned just in time to see Alex's body jerk and he was thrown forward into a desk. The rest of the class panicked and hit the floor, and for the first time I noticed Mike blocking the doorway. He was holding a gun. I stared in shock as reality hit me-Alex. Mike hadn’t been kidding about the threat he’d made. Alex had been shot.

I started to get up and make my way the few steps to Alex, but the Mike moved. He covered the distance between himself and his victim in about two seconds, and soon he had the gun to Alex's head, his arm around his neck in a chokehold. Through the rush of blood in my ears, I heard noise.

"You son of a bitch. You're not so full of yourself now, are you, McLean? Answer me! God damn it you better answer me!" Mike looked totally on-edge. His eyes were wild and unfocused as he stared at Alex, pressing the gun at his temple.

"N-N-N-No." Alex stuttered, eyes flashing with pain. His face quickly drained of color from the effort of answering. I flinched, but continued watching the scene in front of me like it was a movie.

Soon, Brian and I made eye contact. He looked petrified and stared desperately at me for some type of direction. Finally, I snapped out of my daze a bit. I knew we had to do something. We were two of the smallest guys in class, though, no match for a psycho classmate with a gun. But suddenly, an idea came to me. I took out my cell and pressed a button, leaving it face-up but out of view.

I felt wetness on my face and realized I was crying. I looked across the aisle and Brian's head was bowed. Praying. I turned my attention back to Alex as I heard Mike again.

"You arrogant piece of shit! You're gonna die today." My stomach dropped at the change in tone of voice. Now, the gunman was talking lowly in a very soft and almost laughing voice.

I watched helplessly as Alex lay there, gasping, tears rolling down his face. My stomach dropped as I noticed for the pool of blood that was collecting underneath him. I wondered silently if the wound had paralyzed him. Alex was trying desperately to find me and make eye contact, but Mike wouldn't have it.

"You better keep your eyes here kid, or I'll just kill you now. Don't look over there they won't help an arrogant son of a bitch like you! I hate you. I hate your damn cocky attitude and your fucking stupid-ass clothes. They won't help you, 'cause they hate you, too. Do you hear me, McLean? They fucking hate you. But not as much as I do. You're gonna die today, asshole! You're such a damn teacher's pet! Before you came, I was top of the line, damn it! But then you HAD to come in all your damn shitty costumes and be the center of attention. Look around McLean! Everyone's staring at you. You don't like it now, do ya? I said, DO YOU LIKE IT NOW?"

"No, I d-d-don't. . . Please. . ." Alex begged, shutting his eyes.

Sirens cut through the thick atmosphere, and Mike jumped. "Shit!" he cursed. I watched awe-struck as he left his place at Alex's head and took off, I guess trying to make a getaway.

"D?" Alex called out weakly. My head snapped up. "Howie, please," he choked out.

I felt like I was walking through a fog getting to Alex. I knelt down above him, cradling his head in my lap.

"It's all right, Jay, everything'll be fine. Hang on, okay? It'll be all right." I glanced up, startled, as a ball of fabric was extended in front of me and I saw Brian, bare-chested, his sweatshirt in his hand. I stared at it for a second, confused.

Brian's tearful eyes softened as he got down alongside me and attempted to carefully wedge the shirt underneath Alex’s back. He cried out in pain, and Bri apologized. I just stared, transfixed at Alex’s platinum blond hair.

"D . . ." Alex met my gaze with pain-filled eyes. "Sorry . . ."

I sat there, dumbfounded but Brian was quick to react. "Hey, Jay. Are you listening? Look right here, at my face. Alex slowly complied, and my heart lurched as I saw he was getting a foggy look in his eyes. Brian continued, "You have nothin' at all to be sorry for, all right? You know? It's all right, bro." Brian tuned his attention to me. "Tell him," he mouthed.

"Jay, man, you didn't do anything, all right? So don't say sorry." Right then I heard a sob escape Alex and my heart broke into a million pieces.

"Jesus!" Alex's cry hurt me like someone stuck a knife in me and twisted it.

I lifted my eyes upward and saw the ceiling, brown with water spots. I stroked Alex's head and Brian and me started praying. "Please, God, help us! Be here with us now, Father!" Brian prayed.

I silently said the Lord's Prayer. When I got partway in I spoke, "Deliver us from evil."

"God, please," Alex begged. "I want to stay. . ."