Welcome to Fight-Klub. This week we present our first inaugural fight, and we've put two tough, vicious, and experienced fighters on the card. Afterall, nothing is too good for the five or six guys who regularly visit this site (and one lady-- thanks, Mom!).
But first, let me answer a FAQ (Frequently Asked Question). What is Fight Klub? The short answer is this: Fight Klub is an online, virtual fight club. And we get to match up whichever competitors we want, rate them, and set them loose in the virtual oktagon® to do battle. Regular visitors can vote on who wins, and after a set period, all the cast ballots are counted, and a victor is declared. Look, it's almost as fun as going to the dentist!
Now onto this week's fight!
Fight of the Week: Clinton vs. Clugston
As I mentioned, this first fight will be a bloody battle. I found two of the most cold, calculating, and unrepentent thugs I could find for an all-out war. Cynics, naysayers, and the hopelessly old-fashioned will undoubtedly whine, "Hey! You can't have a man fighting a woman! Not in the Virtual Oktagon® of Death! My response is simply this: why the hell not?
If you think women are the weaker sex, you've obviously never met this week's female warrior. This combat-hardened battle-axe could make all but the most brave and courageous among us wet ourselves in abject fear. This is no average woman. She makes Tonya Harding, Xena the Warrior Princess, or my mother-in-law look about as tough as Pippy Longstocking. She's a killer. If you don't believe me, just ask Vince Foster.
Her opponent, however, is no slouch either. He has a blood-thirsty reputation as a bad-ass, and has been known to send many an ookie to the emergency room. He's not the least bit intimidated, and there's no way in hell that he'll back down from this challenge.
So now it's time to vote! But how? Geocities, though they offer free web-space, do not offer CGI capabilities. (Which means that I can't write a program to have the votes automagically tallied.) Thus, the voting system is going to have to be a little less sophisticated.
Everyone has until February 5th to vote. Here's how it's going to work:
News and Other Random Musings:
Listen up! Stop eating the Cheetos you found under the sofa cushion, turn off Oprah and start making a difference today! As much as I am loathe to admit it, this site needs the help of losers-- er, people like you to make it into the stratospheric success and cash cow that I envision it will one day be. [Note to self: come up with a business plan, pronto.]In the meantime, your participation is greatly encouraged and appreciated. How can you get involved?
Finally, you'll notice that I say "Fight of the Week" above, but give everyone a chance to vote for several weeks. That's because I expect that it will take a while to get this site going, and I want to give as many people as possible the opportunity to cast their ballot.