With the collapse of world government in the early 21st century, it seemed natural to Bobby that he would have to rule the world. His eventual fate as demi-god of all of humanity became even clearer when he discovered how to build a board with a nail in it. THis discovery was a milestone in technological development. Beforehand, the most powerful post-WWIII weapon was the pointy stick, or the sort-of-heavy rock. With this invention, modern warfare was revolutionized, and brought in line with other modern sciences.

After the discovery of the new super-weapon, Bobby set out looking for an army to equip with his weapon of mass-destruction. He happened upon a tribe known as the Mall Walkers, who lived in a large structure known in a former age as a Mall. In modern times, these structures were recognized as temples to the god known as Money, and these structures were given the respect they deserved by modern civilization. Now, these structures were ignored, since people tended to do there worshipping in small structures referred to as The John, or El Bano, depending on what side of the border you happened to live on.

With his small kingdom in place, and his mighty army, he decided to challenge the most powerful empire in the area. They were known as the Bureau-O-Craps and they lived in a large ruin known as Washing-Tongue. They were armed with devices that could cover a person with a pile of papers. This was referred to as the Audit, and other tribes feared them. The battle took place on the outskirts of Washing-Tongue, and was a fierce conflict. The Bureau-O-Craps led the attack with their fiercest lawyers, and accountants, supported by Audits. Bobby countered with his weapons of mass-destruction. The Audit was nothing against the might of the Board-With-Nail, or the brand new Tax-Cutter, which could shred the largest pile of paper. As his army advanced through the enemy ranks, the Bureau-O-Craps elite forces, the Politicians, began to retreat. The rest of the enemy followed suit, and the city of Washing-Tongue was theirs.

After that victory followed victory. Mighty cities, and tiny towns fell to his vast army. His empire crossed the oceans into the other continents. No one could resist the power of the Board-With-Nail, or his other super-weapons. In the end Bobby's dream came true, and he ruled the world, except for New Jersey, which no army could conquer, due to its strong odor.

The End