| 5/5/2003 My birthday was two days ago. Dad dropped by on friday we went to see X2 it was entertaining he also got me some books and a DVD burner for my birhtday. This last week for me has been really tough. I've been really low. Last 3 days i've rented movies and watched them at moms. To distract myself. Hope is slipping away from me. I asked lisa if she wanted to go to see "House of a thousand corpses, " she couldn't though because she was working when i was off.Chris, Jeff, Lisa, and I hung out for like 15 mins after they got off. It was really fun. I have no friends, people to hang out with during my free time. I've called Erin for almost 6 months now. I'm starting to get really irritated with her. She never returns my messages but when I get her twice she said she wanted to but was too busy. Seems like she's just leading me on. I think this thursdays call is going to be my last. Everynight that I've gone to bed this week I've hoped that I wouldn't wake up again. No one at work knows of my depression. Toni Noticed something was wrong but she's gone now. Ganelle noticed it a couple times, she said I looked deathly ill. Nothing recently though. I wish gumps were alive. I want to die. |