{"The Strutter" TR Parker is seen looking into a backstage door by a mobile
EWC camera crew. Wearing street clothes, he apparently just arrived at the
arena, slung over his right shoulder is a garmet bag, he mutters a
"Thanks," sighs, and turns toward the cameraman, nearly bowling him over.}
[TR Parker]
"Oh, sorry about that."
{Parker begins walking up the hall with purpose, as the camera
backpeddles.}
"Children of the Acropolis, I see you've got one of those Grecian
relationships with Sebastian Sloan, which is fine with me. If you need to
be led then you've got a one-way ticket to a short career. Sloan is, and
always has been a follower. Your best bud Jeremy Byron paid the price and
you're booking first-class accomodations to whatever hell-hole he's living
in."
{Parker opens a side door, looks around and slams it.}
"Damn."
{Parker continues walking up the aisle and pulls out a black and red mask
from his jacket pocket.}
"I bet you two thought it was real cool when Byron pulled that little
stunt. You guys wanted Wildcard? Was it Sloan? Was it EWC? Real funny.
In just a few hours your worst dreams are going to be wearing this mask and
EWC is never going to be the same again. Sloan, if you're out there
watching this, I'm inviting you to be a VIP for this match...I want you to
watch a *real* sacrifice as your boys' fate will be left to the hand
they're dealt. And everything is wild when it comes to my deck!"
{Parker stops at an intersection of corridors, looks both ways, and in a
fit of frustration asks...}
"Have you guys seen Queen?"
{A member of the production crew offers up a nearby room and Parker makes a
beeline for it, opening the door with relief.}
"There you two are, get dressed...we've got business."
@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%
MATCH #3: ERNIE GRENDEL vs. SIDI AL NASSIR
Sidi al Nassir's music (a weird cross between Indian song and lounge music)
plays as Nassir comes down to the ring first, carrying a mic to considerable
booing and to a fairly loud chant of "Raghead"
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[al Nassir]
Quiet.....quiet you witless peons. I am not out here to talk to you fools.
I am here to talk to my scheduled opponent tonight, Ernie Grendel. Ernie
Grendel, you are many things. You are decadent. You are Western.
You are an infidel....but you are also tough. You are also strong. And,
I hope, you are no fool. You are a brave, but injured warrior Grendel,
the EWC has done you no favor in sending you against me. But I have
no wish to further injure you Grendel, so I make you an offer. Come down
here. Lay down in this ring. Allow the referee to count my victory. No
more of your blood need be shed for the entertainment of these pigs
who call themselves your fans. Your medical condition makes defeat
inescapable. There is no dishonor in losing to the Chic Sheikh. But pain,
Ernie, pain can escape you tonight.
@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%
A few moments of silence, then...
[Grendel] (over the PA system)
Let's get crazy........
The crowd goes APESHIT as "Crazy" by Seal kicks in through the arena.
Ernie comes down, wearing his neck brace and walking with a cane. Cross notes
that Grendel looked fine last week when he appeared, and is wondering if the
injuries were agrravated.
Nassir holds the ropes open for Ernie to enter, and he does, goes to ring
center and lays down, slowly and in obvious pain. Sidi al Nassir
places one foot on Ernie's chest and the referee orders the bell rung to
begin the match. Before he can even get down to begin the 3-count however,
Ernie suddenly legsweeps al Nassir to the canvas and rolls him up for a 3-count
pinfall victory at 0:03.
###########################################
# WINNER: Ernie Grendel, via pinfall 0:03 #
###########################################
Grendel then rolls out of the ring, and stares at an *enraged* al Nassir.
Ernie grabs the ringside mic.......
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[Grendel]
[with considerable calm] al Nassir... I guess you didn't HEAR me last week.
So I'll say it again. This isn't Ernie Grendel, the human punching bag.
Not anymore. Consider yourself fortunate. I don't have *time* for you right
now... So get back in line behind every other spud who wants to make a name
for himself... and I'll get back to you.
@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%
And Ernie just walks away...no hair mosh, no pyros,
nothing.
You know something, this might not be a bad thing.
Grendel is getting really focused now..he's not pandering
to the public, he's not as showy...maybe he *is* tired of
getting his ass handed to him and wants to start handing
it back out.
One interesting thing I noticed...not one word about Fuego.
He's got a shot at the heavyweight champion of the world in
two weeks and he hasn't mentioned word one about him.
That's what this "new focus" could be all about, folks...
this could be all about Grendel getting ready for the
fight of his life aganist the most dangerous man in the
EWC, and that's Fuego!
(cutaway splitscreen shot to Roker Showtime and Damien Omega in different
locker areas)
And there's Roker Showtime and Damien OMega...they're
getting ready to fight their archfoes...are they
going to work well together, though???
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
More commercials...say guys, if you can make up some commercials, I'd
probably be more willing to do reports this way instead of TV reports.
Plus, every *different* commerical you do that features your wrestlers
will net you an extra $1,000 if it airs!!!
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
MATCH #4: RETROSPECTION v. THE PENDRAGONS
"Obsession" by Animotion cues on and, desptie the absence of the normal
neon sparklers explode along the runway, the heat still comes pouring from
the rafters. Stepping onto the runway are Retrospection, making their
first appearance since losing to Weapons of Last Resort. Quite unlike
their past appearances they are both dressed in all black and neither of
them are laughing. A few fans start some rather offensive chants causing
Styles to flip them the bird as he and Gentry go straight to the ring--the
chanting only gets worse.
As surprising, there are no pre-match antics or jumps, Styles steps into
the ring with Sinclair and the bell sounds. Styles goes for a leg drive
takedown but Sinclair leaps it and comes down onto "Old School's" head with
a knee drop. Styles is then tossed to the ropes and after propelling
himself off the other side, Sinclair leaves the mat and drives an elbow
into Style's head prompting a round of cheers. The Pendragon stays right
on top of Styles tossing him into the ropes before dropping to the mat.
However, he had no chance to see Styles blind tag to Gentry and was soon
easy prey for Retrospection. Styles hit the breaks and when Sinclair stood
up, drop kicked him right into the waiting arms of Gentry for a stiff
German suplex and an early two count. In the meanwhile, Styles spit on
Hawk drawing the hot-head into the ring so that the referee had to go cut
him off. While that was happening Styles caught Sinclair in a tilt-a-whirl
backbreaker that Gentry spiked with a second rope forearm drop. Without
a tag Styles stayed in the ring and while the ref questioned Gentry, Styles
was able to reach into his tights and clock Sinclair with some sort of
object that was quickly tossed to the ring. A near fall was broken up by a
Hawk elbow drop as the bigger man was not happy.
The fans started clapping, trying to get the Pendragons back into things
and it seemed to help. Sinclair no-sold a few Styles chops and a savate
kick before hitting a jawbreaker out of nowhere. As Styles bounced into
his corner to tag Gentry, Sinclair (just of course) made the tag to Hawk
who was ready to get physical. A clothesline caught Gentry and another
sent Styles to the floor. Too bad that left him in perfect position to
swipe Hawk's leg on the rebound sending him flat onto his face and in
perfect position for a Gentry leg drop to the back of the head. A hard
irish whip followed and Gentry barreled into Hawk with a hard avalanche and
he then caught him on the way out of the corner with a single arm DDT.
While this was going on Styles snuck up behind Sinclair, low-blowed him and
then sling-shot suplexed him off the apron onto the floor. "The Throwback"
then called to his partner to end things and Styles was tagged back in.
"The Flashback" side slam spiked by a foward reverse DDT followed and the
match was history.
#############################################
# WINNERS: Retrospection, via pinfall, 5:12 #
#############################################
As the crowd jeered, Retrospection called for the mic.
[Gentry]
Shut your traps and get ready to learn something!!!
[Styles]
We know you're all dumber than cow manure, but even some of you might have
noticed that we're looking a little different tonight. No neon, no
glitter, no Q-bert costumes, just two men dressed in black, wrestling. You
remember what that is, don't you!?!
[Gentry]
You see, the last time you saw us we were fighting for the world tag
titles, now we get word that at the next pay per view, we're on the free
for all. FREE? The EWC isn't charging people to see wrestlers as talented
as us??? That's like giving away mint copies of Thriller or Molly Ringwald
pictures autographed by John Hughes.
[Styles]
While Jay and I were kicking it back on the beach, we talked about the
different ways we could handle this. We could have come out here and
pointed out that we've beaten Beyond Our Control twice and continue to
explain that they belong in the circus and not a ring. We could have
pointed out that Siouxnami has yet to win a match against a real team and
that they are a walking stereotypes. Or we might have explained how Frozen
Hell are just two average singles wrestlers who make Don Johnson look like
a talented actor...BUUUUUUUT we decided we were above all of that.
[Gentry]
Next we thought of breaking the bank and debuting our interpretations of
all the classic sitcoms, Family Ties, Fact of Life, hell even Alf--they all
gonna get the Retro touch. But then we decided that you sequoia necks
didn't deserve it, and that our Mallory costumes could be saved for better
uses.
[Styles]
And then we remembered something, when we first came to the EWC we promised
to teach you all some lessons. We had hoped we could do it subtlely,
figured you'd learn by watching--but that was too much to ask.
[Gentry]
So next week Bri and I are gonna start making you idiots attend summer
school. We're going to break out the chalk, set up the easel and teach you
all a few things about what REAL wrestling is all about. Lectures,
quizzes, and if you're bad maybe a little paddling.
[Styles]
So get out your homework pads and get ready for your first assignment. To
prepare for class, we strongly suggest that you look up Scicily on a map
and then study up on Chicago during the prohibition--and don't even think
of trying to pull one over on these two teachers.
[Gentry]
That's right, anyone hoping to get by on the Godfather trilogy will be
guaranteed an F.
[Styles]
Plus, you should no better than to waste your time on such a lousy 70's
movie. If you want something really interesting watch The Money
Pit--that's a movie!!!
[Gentry]
Until then peons---
[Both]
Class dismissed!!!
(the two men do the Top Gun high-five, low-five, and leave the ring to a
chorus of boos)