Club Homepage

Facts About Infantilism 

Some Formative
Elements of Infantilism
 

Balancers and Naturals 

A Little Physiology 

The History of This Site 

What I've Learned From This Site 

My Story 

Some Simple Solutions 

Links & Contacts


The Infantilist Support Club Forum
(for Infantilists)

The SO Support Forum
(for the Significant Others of Infantilists)

The Email Exchange Chatroom


The Infantilist's Declaration of Independence From Ignorance


Naturals, Balancers and More


            First, for the purposes of this website, let me begin by defining what we mean by the term Infantilist.  For the purposes of discussion, this website defines an infantilist as:

Any person who has found that he or she derives a certain amount of pleasure from the act of wearing a diaper, even when no practical or real need is present, and who has done so in the past on a repeated basis over time.  

In such instances it is essentially a form of fantasy where one imagines that one has somehow returned to a state of infancy when in fact the reality of one's life is that one has matured well beyond that stage of life.  Also most would probably agree that for them this fantasy includes at least some elements of security, pleasure, relinquishment of responsibility, submission, secrecy, shame, and stress relief.  Some other less common but perhaps more difficult experiences or feelings some infantilists experience are masochism, homosexuality, transvestism, depression and anxiety.  Actually the long list of all of the possible emotions and experiences that are sometimes associated with infantilism, is probably an endless list, but we have tried to lay out some of the more common emotions and experiences experienced by infantilists here.  

            While many infantilists have learned how to adapt well to a lifestyle that incorporates at least some aspects of infantilism, many others have experienced various social or anxiety related problems which may have arisen in association with their infantilism.  

            After being associated with this website since 1997, we have not yet heard of a single individual who we would define as a successfully recovering infantilist.  For the sake of the terms of the discussions carried on at this website, we will define a successfully recovering infantilist (or a Recoverer) as anyone who successfully meets all of the following three criterion:

  1. An infantilist who has been able to entirely abandon the wearing of diapers for a year or more.
  2. An infantilist who fully and reasonably believes that he or she will probably never return to the wearing diapers solely for reasons of enjoyment ever again.
  3. An infantilist who has made this choice concerning diaper wearing completely freely and independently.  One who can say with a reasonable amount of certainty that the decision to stop was made over a year ago without any explicit (or implied) pressure from parents, spouse, institutions (e.g. the armed services), or other cohabitors.

            We have formulated this rather strict definition to describe a successful recovery from infantilism due the unfortunate, but well known fact that we infantilists all have imagined ourselves at one point or another to have successfully recovered from the desire after either shorter periods of abstinence, or after periods of external pressures from those around us, but to the best of my knowledge, as of this writing, we still have not yet heard of a single individual who could be described as a Recoverer according to the above definition.  So far as we know, like it or not, we all seem to eventually relapse.

            We do not by any means, offer the fact that we have not yet heard of anyone who has achieved a successful recovery according to the above definition, as a proof that such people do not exist.  In fact, it remains as my personal hope that such people do exist.  But still, this is the fact to date.  If anyone knows of any such individual, or if they are such an individual themselves, then please let me know!  Please email the primary webmaster at: Scott P., and we will not hesitate to document this on this site, on this page, and in the Forum.  While we personally believe in the innate indominability of the human spirit, even in matters that are so poorly understood as infantilism, meanwhile we are also a pragmatists, and we know with certainty that in our own lives, until a greater clarity and understanding of the issue might someday evolve, at some very deep level in myself, for the time being we do best to simply accept ourselves as we are, diapers and all, and to move on with the rest of our lives, as best we are able.  

            Now, having defined both the very real term: Infantilist, and the still abstract term: Recoverer.  All of the infantilists we have met so far on this site are what we call Practicing Infantilists as opposed to successfully Recovering Infantilists.  

            To define what a Practicing Infantilist is, we build this definition upon the earlier definition of a Recovering Infantilist.  We define a Practicing Infantilist as the converse of a Recovering Infantilist, namely:

A Practicing Infantilist is any Infantilist who has worn diapers when no practical or real need was present, at any time over the last 12 months, and who has at any time in his or her life done so repeatedly over time.

Experience with this website has taught us that there are three basic types of Practicing Infantilists.  These are, Naturals, Balancers and Full-Stoppers:

Naturals-    A Natural is an infantilist who generally prefers to give his or her infantilistic desires the upper hand in his or her life, if at all possible.  Many Naturals actively seek out work situations and living situations that will tolerate their wearing and using of diapers 24 hours a day, seven days a week.  While such living situations may be possible to arrange, the finding of a suitable work situations is often much more of a challenge.
Balancers-    A Balancer is an infantilist who tries to reach a reasonable compromise or balance with his or her infantilistic desires.  Considering the somewhat impractical, inefficient and unavoidably socially stigmatic aspects of diaper wearing (in many or most social situations), the Balancer usually limits his or her diaper wearing to the privacy of his or her own abode, and usually chooses to operate publicly and in nearly all social interactions without the wearing of diapers. Some Naturals refer to Balancers as "closet-infantilists".
Full-Stoppers-    A Full-Stopper is an infantilist who maintains the hope or belief that he or she still retains the latent ability to one day fully stop or eliminate his or her infantilistic desires, regardless of all evidence to the contrary.  It is most probable that most infantilists began their diaper wearing with this hope still firmly in mind, but as the years go by, and as the thought and behavior patterns seems to only become more and more ingrained, many infantilists seem to eventually discard or deny this hope (see footnote). As can be guessed, considering the fact that there are not yet any recorded examples of any truly successful Recovering infantilists, most Full-Stoppers today are reluctantly forced to Balance their infantilistic desires, until such time as they might find a better way to deal with them.  Some Balancers and Naturals react negatively, or even with a certain amount of hostility towards Full-Stoppers, because they feel, based on their own personal experience, that the Full-Stop philosophy is an unrealistic, dead-end philosophy, that implicitly judges them for accepting themselves as they are.  Certainly those who count themselves on both sides of this debate have some legitimate points to make.  It is my hope that those who fall on either side of this debate might always bear in mind the possibility that nobody knows for sure who is right, at least so far, and that patience would dictate that we will probably all one day know what this is really all about, when the time is right for each of us.
SO's of Infantilists-    The SO (Significant Other) of an infantilist is a person who chooses to remain in a long term intimate relationship with one whom they know to be an infantilist.


 
            It is our hope with this site that through the process of such a dialogue, we and others may be able to find the strength and support we need to rise above what we (at least) feel has been and could easily still be a major problem in our lives. We also believe that the problem of infantilism often causes low self esteem and a lack of genuine self respect. It seems to me that most of the infantilists we have met on the internet are fine people who somewhere along the line came to associate the state of infancy with a lost state of acceptance and love. 
 
            Regardless of where you, or a person you may love may fall on the infantilist scale, we hope that this site will be of some value to you.

 

                                                       Sincerely,

 

                                                       Scott P.
                                                       Jonathan D.
                                                            Webmasters

 Footnote:     We have authored this website with the idea in mind that Recovering Infantilists as we defined above may actually be out there somewhere, in spite of all evidence to the contrary. As they say on the X-Files, "The Truth is out there."