NEWS JUST IN . . . Phil recieves second parking ticket. Phil a local politician wannabe has been involved in yet another fracas with the local authority. The traffic warden this time caught his car ILLEGALLY parked on chamberlain road. This being an unusual place for a homosexual to recieve a parking fine, has caused Phil to to start a smear campaign against the entire Southampton City Council. The smear campaign will involve prank calls and threats to 'out' senior membersof the council. MR Jones (64) is a potential target for the outraged Phil, he is quoted as having said this lunchtime "I cant believe he would do something like that!" Phil has now gone into hiding and wishes to be known as Phillipe from this day forth(apparently it will suit his new image- viva la resistance!) EddnPaul.com can reveal that Phil IS ARMED & DANGEROUS.

WHAT HAS BEEN GOING ON . . . not alot really. Well EddnPaul got so drunk on the night that Gareth and Tom revealed all about their sordid internet sex escapades. I don' t remember it all, however, watching someone having a w*** on their webcam was something to do with it.

Last night was when it all happened. The evening began well with the Paul half of EddnPaul being thoroughly rude to everyone- something to do with a text message on someone else's phone saying " stay away from him you whore, he is mine"

Anyway on to the gossip -

AL CATCHES ***** ****** (that stands for eleven fifteen not VD) Al was asked the other day if his hair was on purpose, and also if he was involved in scandalous train spotting. He ,after an embarrassing silence revealed that it is true and that there is nothing he finds more enjoyable than waiting for the eleven fifteen train. He does this just to get a sexual glimpse of its registration. Here at EddnPaul.com we think it has something to do with sexual frustration. Oh yeah and we think your jacket makes you look like a bog cleaner.

JAMES GET HIMSELF STICKY . . . James our well known high profile lawyer type person and previous rent boy (ooops wasn't supposed to mention that! Sorry!) Has revealed that he PLEASURES HIMSELF over photos of HIMSELF. Upon this announcement many persons present began to choke on their drinks and spit beer, vodka, coke and spunk out all over the table. James says his favorite photo involves him wearing a small pair of swimming trunks and a lifejacket. Its just a shame the jacket won't save him from either drowning in his ego or being sucked even further up his own arse.

MARITIME BEDTIME PASTIMES . . . no its not a new Guilbert and Sullivan light opera it is the horrific revelation that shocked almost eveybody at the edge on Friday. Everyone, that is, except for that awful DJ that yells take it up the arse all of the time. Anyway, of those present even Mark (comment removed at request of victim) was surprised. Recent investigations have shown that Steven is rather bizarrely involved in WATERSPORTS. uuurrggghh! Steve was confronted with the facts in a dramatic showdown on Friday night. Unexpectedly he said "you know perfectly well that I am" He then went on to say in a positively boasting manner "I prefer to have my Boyf pee on my nipples" Now by this time the crowd that had gathered to hear the digusting tale simultaneously vomited.-Steve doesn' t remember because he was drunk. We at EddnPaul.com suggest that Steve refrains from talking as he is always offending people.