The Lighthouse
byAnne
Part 1
*****
Xander opened the door of the lighthouse and hurled himself inside to escape the squalls of ice-cold wind and freezing rain which swept the small island. Through the rain swept window, he watched the boat which had brought him there leave, fighting its way through the high waves and the hollows and almost felt seasick again. The Captain of the "Sea Hawk" would come to look for him in a week, when he would bring provisions for the new lighthouse keeper.
The young man snorted, then removed his drenched coat and boots. He went to the door in front of him, knocked then entered the room, a semicircular lounge that followed the curvature of the lighthouse. He heard the crackling of a fire and a loud snore. He approached the couch, which was facing the fireplace, and from which the sounds of snoring came.
He walked around to the front of the couch and discovered Giles sprawled on the cushions, wearing only his pyjamas bottoms, and holding an empty bottle of Scotch. He had difficulty recognizing the older man. His face, always pale and tired, had become even more angular and was eaten by a greying, bristly beard. His cheeks were hollow, his eyes were sunken. His body was very thin; his skin was crumpled and almost transparent. He could see all his veins. His wrinkles were deeper and he was greying at the temples. He seemed to have aged at least ten years. He looked like a spectre.
"Oh my God!" he breathed, shocked.
He took Giles' hand and tightened it in his. "Giles, it's me, Xander, wake up. I need to talk to you."
Giles remained asleep, knocked out by all the alcohol which he had drunk. Xander sighed sadly. Buffy's death had brought him down, annihilated him, and revived the pain of Jenny's horrible death with agonizing clarity. His sorrow was immense, absolute. Since the funeral Giles had closed himself off to everyone he knew, had built a wall around his heart so he wouldn't suffer any more, and had begun to drink to forget the death of the Slayer that he loved as though she was his own daughter. He drank far too much, and passed out in a drunken stupor each night. He hardly ever ate, and had stopped taking care of himself, hardly bothering to shower or shave, and had quickly become a wreck.
Xander sat down on the edge of the couch and again took Giles' hand, which was as fragile as that of an old man. He remembered the evening Giles had come to Magic Box and told them that he was going to return to England. Then he had simply turned and left. Early this morning, he had received Ethan Rayne's phone call, and the sorcerer had told him that he knew where "Ripper" was, and that "the old boy" needed help, and that was all. Xander had quickly packed a suitcase and rushed to the airport to take the first flight to London.
"And I'm here," Xander said.
The young man got up and yawned. He had to find a bed soon. He was falling asleep. He discovered Giles' room in a awful state and spent almost an hour removing all the empty bottles which littered the floor, and emptying ashtrays full of cigarettes butts; vacuuming the stained carpet clean, stripping and remaking the bed, then, finally, he opened the black curtains and the window to air out the room which smelt of stale tobacco, sweat and alcohol. He took a blanket from the cupboard (that he had also tidied) then returned to the living room. He covered Giles with it then he looked around the lighthouse while he waited for the bedroom to air out. It was about two o'clock in the morning when he slid himself between the cool sheets and fell asleep almost at once.
*****
Xander woke up late the following morning in a sunlit bedroom. When he sat up he was surprised to discover Giles standing in the doorway. The Watcher was immobile as a statue, and looked upset.
"Hi Giles!"
"What are you doing here, Xander?" Giles growled out.
The boy got up from the bed, went to the older man and suddenly threw himself against him and hugged him.
"I'm so happy to see you again Giles!" he exclaimed with a radiant smile. "I missed you, and so did the others too…"
Giles stepped out of Xander's embrace, and in a cold, sharp voice stated: "I shall not return to Sunnydale, Xander. If you came to ask me to go back, you are wasting your time. You should leave."
Xander shook his head. "The boat won't return for a week, Giles. In the meantime, you will change your mind."
"How did you know where I was? I used magic to create a cloaking shield so that nobody could locate me. Especially not Willow."
"Ethan phoned me yesterday morning and told me where you were, Giles." Xander said.
Giles grumbled. "Ethan! The bastard! I met him accidentally two weeks ago in the harbour. He owns a house on the Isle of Wight. We hardly spoke. The only thing that I said to him it is not to approach me if he wanted to stay alive, and to forget me."
"He worries about you, Giles."
The Watcher snorted. "I don't believe that! Ethan is totally egocentric. He's interested only in himself! … "Well, as you're here for a week, I shall move myself into the old lighthouse keeper's cottage at the other end of the island. I am not interested in seeing or talking to anyone."
Then he turned and left the room.
"Giles! Wait!"
Xander caught Giles up in the corridor and seized him by the arm. "Giles, you have to pull yourself together. I know you're suffering over Buffy's death. I understand that. But I need you; we need you, all of us: Anya, Tara, Dawn, Spike, and me. Please! Be the Giles I appreciated again, the Giles I admired. Be the Giles I love… I'm in love with."
Giles stared at the young man, astounded. It was some time before he was able to speak again, and he croaked: «You're in love with…?"
Before Giles could finish the sentence, he found himself slammed against the wall, a hot mouth pressed to his, a tongue seeking entrance. The Watcher moaned deep in his throat and opened his mouth. Xander took that to mean it was all right to continue and slipped his tongue into Giles' mouth. He started to plunder his mouth and Giles responded by putting his tongue into the young man's mouth and nibbling back. Then Xander pressed his knee against Giles' crotch, and suddenly the gentleness of their kissing made way for heartily expressed passion. They devoured their mouths and lips frantically, with burning passion, for several minutes before finally stopping, panting for breath. Xander parted slightly from the other man and asked him:
"Are you in love with me too?"
Giles grinned. "Isn't it obvious? Yes I'm in love with you, Xander. But… What about Anya?"
"She dumped me a month ago. I don't want to talk about it. I've always loved you, Giles."
"I too, Xander... even when I was in love with Jenny. Probably because I'm bisexual."
"Same thing for me. All right. We'll talk about our love later, Giles, because now I want to make love to you."
"Please." Giles said, almost begging. It had been too long since he'd touched anyone, too long since he'd been held or touched. "But wait a minute, Xander. I can't let you make love to an old, decrepit
man."
"I don't care."
"Yes I know, but if I was in your place I would and I've my pride. So…" he chanted a spell in Latin and he suddenly changed back to the way he had looked two months ago.
"Better," Giles said, smiling.
"Whoa!"
The Watcher moaned softly when he felt Xander's hand find its way under the elastic waist of his pyjamas bottoms. Xander groaned in Giles' mouth as the Watcher opened his thighs a bit more giving him full access to his maleness. Xander pushed the pants down to Giles' knees while continuing to kiss him. He suddenly moved back, gazing at the wonderful sight of his naked lover. His eyes travelled over the solid legs, the tight abdomen, the firm, sculpted chest and strong shoulders, roaming back down to gaze at the magnificent erection awaiting his touch.
"Beautiful," he whispered in awe. "Do you mind getting on the bed on your back, Giles?"
Giles complied happily. Xander gently parted his legs and then knelt between them.
"It's foreplay time," the boy said.
Xander caressed Giles' chest, running his fingers through the greying hair there. He kissed his way along the Watcher's shoulders and stomach and began to massage him, slowly. Giles started to moan in response to the touch, which was arousing him so much. After a time Xander replaced his hands with his mouth, licking and kissing the chest, fingers brushing and pinching the hardened nipples. Giles groaned in pleasure as the young man continued his massage down his arms and legs. Xander moved his hands upward on the older man's body, reaching from his sides up to his navel, swirled his tongue in it making the body underneath him shiver, and then down towards the pubic hair. Giles growled deep in his throat when one hand reached back and down to torment the sensitive testicles, lifting and rolling them, stroking the delicate skin beneath.
"Oh God! Xander…"
Giles gasped when Xander grasped his hardening penis. Xander moved his hand up and down Giles throbbing shaft, then slid his hand over the scrotum and down to the older man's anus, rubbing it, massaging it, listening to the Englishman whimper and gasp with pleasure, until he finally wet his index finger with saliva. Giles gasped and tensed, waiting for the next step. Xander thrust that finger into his puckered opening, following it quickly with two more, gently massaging and stretching him.
"Aaaaaaah! Xander! Want you inside me, now!"
"You're sure, Giles?"
"Yesssss. Oh God, I want it, I want it so badly."
"I've got no lube and no condoms. I wasn't planning on making love to you while I was here, Giles."
"It wasn't something I was planning on either, Xander, and I never dreamed it would happen with you. But I can fix this little problem."
Giles closed his eyes, opened his left hand and chanted something in Latin. The last word pronounced, a bottle of lubricant and a packet of condoms appeared in his palm.
"Whoa!" Xander exclaimed, surprised and fascinated. "Can you make ice-cream and donuts appear too?"
Giles nodded. "Everything I want."
"Great!"
*****
Giles reached over to the bedside table for the small foil package. He carefully tore it open and removed the condom, rolling it down the hard, eager shaft in front of him. Then taking the lube from his lover he smoothed it slowly and carefully over the condom, whilst Xander let his fingers roam through his hair, across his chest, toying from time to time with his hardened nipples making him whimper in pleasure.
Xander raised himself up on his knees, pushed Giles' knees up to his chest, and then carefully pressed against the tight right of muscle while Giles tried to relax as much as possible, then the finger was past his anus and sliding again into him. Xander moved it a few times and then withdrew it, to replace it with two fingers. Soon, the two fingers moved in and out and stretched him, then pressed upward. The Watcher thrashed wildly as he felt Xander's fingers scrape his prostate, almost bucking the boy off. Xander added a third finger and pumped them in and out until he was sure Giles was ready to be penetrated. Giles signalled his approval by stretching his legs wider.
Xander then took his burning cock in his hand and pushed on the puckered opening. He felt it trying to resist and pushed a little harder. He took his time, pushing forward and easing back, until the head finally slid inside. Gritting his teeth, Giles tried to ignore the pain as the purple, hot and leaking crown of Xander's cock finally breached his body. Xander groaned in pleasure when his lover's body clamped down on his shaft and he did not move until the grip eased. Then with a grunt he got it in a bit further, then he shoved forward hard and slid all the way home, angling his hips to rub against Giles' prostate. A howl of pleasure was his reward as Giles pushed mindlessly against him, seeking to recreate the sensation that coursed through his whole body. Xander held himself still to give Giles time to adjust to his size and to savour, too, the feel of being fully sheathed in his lover's body, the feeling of being held in the smooth, hot heat that surrounded him, engulfed him.
He had never experienced anything like this before, and all the times with Anya paled in comparison to this. When Xander felt Giles writhing he knew he was ready for more, and he slowly pulled back out of his lover, until just the head of his engorged member remained. Then he thrust forward for the first time and almost came at the blissful sensation.
Giles 'aaaaaahed' in both pain and pleasure as Xander slid in and out of him, going faster and deeper each time. He bucked his hips against Xander, rubbed his groin against the boy's, and his erection was straining against his navel. Reaching down, the young man grasped his partner's rock hard cock and stroked it in time to their coupling. Giles' hand joined his in holding it, and they pumped together in a concert of moans, groans and grunts.
Little by little Xander lost control of his pacing and his thrusts became more rapid and erratic. In one smooth glide, he suddenly pulled back. Giles let out a strangled cry of frustration at the sudden feeling of loss. Xander placed Giles' legs on his shoulders and slammed back inside his body, burying himself up to the hilt. He started to thrust inside his lover again. Giles purred. The pain had disappeared, replaced only by bliss. He suddenly closed his legs around Xander's back and tilted his hips up, holding the older man
in place while he ground against Xander mindlessly. The boy uttered a low growl when he felt warm muscles clamp around his aching member. He arched, stiffened and his entire body began to shake. His testicles tightened then drew against his body and he climaxed at the same time Giles' straining shaft erupted, shooting hot strings of semen across his belly. The older man threw his head back and howled out his release, his face contorted in an almost painful pleasure.
Xander, utterly spent, boneless, breathing heavily and covered with sweat, fell on top of his lover. He stayed inside Giles until his cock softened and he had regained some energy. He then rolled off to one side, grabbed a blanket and pulled it over the both of them. Giles fit himself into Xander's side and hugged his lover close.
"Oh Giles! I just can't ever get enough of you," Xander purred, before capturing his lover's lips in a gentle kiss. "I love you, Giles. I love you so much."
"Love you too…" Giles mumbled before falling asleep.
Xander snuggled closer to the frail body next to him and placed a little kiss on Giles' chest, just above his heart. With a little happy sigh he closed his eyes, snuggled even closer and fell asleep, dreaming of their coming days together.
*****
Giles awoke first. Turning his head, he saw Xander curled up against him spoon fashion. The boy's arm was wrapped possessively around his slim waist. He slowly and gently moved away from his partner's perfect body. Xander moaned and his eyelids fluttered. Giles turned around and looked at the sleeping young man, sadness in his eyes. He could never have Xander as a lover because he was cursed. Randall's father, a sorcerer, had cast a spell on him after his son's funeral so that all the people he fell in love with would die somehow. He was Randall's lover and was responsible for his tragic death. He had to pay for his crime.
Giles exhaled a long sigh and got up from the bed. He quickly got dressed then kissed Xander on the forehead, softly. He whispered, `goodbye, Xander, I love you,' and quickly left the bedroom.
Xander woke up five minutes later and was very disappointed not to find Giles lying next to him in bed. He desperately wanted to kiss and caress his lover again. He got up, quickly got dressed then started to search for the Watcher. In the living room he discovered a brown envelope on the table, with "last will and testament" written on it. Xander felt the blood drain from his face and he began to shake with fear. Giles had decided to commit suicide. Pushed by instinct and logic (it was easy to commit suicide by throwing himself from the top of a lighthouse), he climbed the 350 stairs so fast as he was able to and finally reached his destination.
Xander froze on the spot, horror-struck, in the rain. Giles had stepped over the railing which circled the top of the lighthouse. He stood on his heels at the edge of the precipice. His hands were grasping on the wet, black metal.
"Giles, don't do this, I beg you! Giles, I love you!"
Giles nodded slowly, sadly, tears rolling down his pale, hollow and bearded cheeks. "I know Xander, and it is exactly for that reason that I have to commit suicide."
The boy blinked twice, puzzled. "What? "
The Watcher sighed. I'm cursed, Xander. All the people that I loved during my life, my lovers, men or women, like Randall and Jenny, Olivia, all died, because of me. I love you, Xander and I don't want you to die too. Goodbye, Xander, take care. And try to forgive me. I have no choice but to kill myself … I love you so much."
Xander sobbed. "Giles, no, don't do this, please…"
The Englishman released his hold on the railings and began to slip off the tiny ledge. As quick as lighting Xander rushed to Giles, caught him at the last second by the collar of his jacket and with all his strength, hoisted him onto the platform. Giles struggled, growling like a bear and managed to get free of the boy's embrace. He had stepped over the railing again when Xander grabbed him by his hair, pulled him to him and punched him in the jaw, hard. The Watcher slumped to the cement floor, swept by the cold wind and sea spray, unconscious. Xander then hoisted him over his shoulder, fireman style and went to the door, which led to the stairs.
*****