EnsTren: (*looks at sheseto heseth*)
Edmondia: (...he did earn some brownie points...)
EnsTren: (yes he did)
Edmondia: (and promptly confused the hell out of her)
Edmondia: (he's being... incredibly sweet in my head)
EnsTren: (Seto still wants to strangle him at night and dig her
nails into his flesh though)
Edmondia: (I have no doubt that she will - and that he'll be
deliriously happy about it)
EnsTren: (that is sweet, how?)
EnsTren: (why will he be happy?)
Edmondia: (well, he feels he deserves punishment - and her
wanting to hurt him is better than apathy)
Edmondia: (and she's touching him)
EnsTren: (I think she half wants to take a knife to him but
doesn't trust herself not to kill him)
EnsTren: (even if it's with hate and anger she's touching him)
Edmondia: (exactly)
Edmondia: (and... he's still doting on her)
EnsTren: (it frightens and confuses her)
Edmondia: (the fact that he's letting it happen, or that he's
obviously still in love with her?)
EnsTren: (both, and the doting)
EnsTren: (you can't predict insane people easily)
Edmondia: (but he's not insane)
EnsTren: (in her opinion he is acting that way)
Edmondia: (he's... trying to repent)
Edmondia: (he's a priest - and he's taking that very very very
seriously)
EnsTren: (and what about Yami and Yugi? did they apologize
or just leave or what?)
Edmondia: (I think they left her a note or something)
Edmondia: (she was in no condition to talk to them)
EnsTren: (Seto is now terrified of them even more and bans
Seth from leaving the house, if they see, the pale the bruises,
the little claw marks scabbed over who knows what they'll do to
her)
Edmondia: (and he very very quietly asks if he can call his
cousin on the phone, please, if it's not too much trouble? he
can't keep the nightmares away on his own, you see, and... he
doesn't want to wake Mokuba with the screaming)
EnsTren: (and she's shaking and the idea of him talking to
Yami frightens her, that he'll tell this secret too "by mistake" or
something else that he knows about her that will hurt)
EnsTren: (Some secret code to talk in or something. Phobias
don't make sense after all)
EnsTren: (and she says that she'll have the room sound
proofed and she'll think about letting them talk)
EnsTren: (then goes and bugs the phones and hooks up
computers and stuff)
Edmondia: (and he thanks her very quietly and goes away
again - and Mokuba is woken up by the screaming)
EnsTren: (And she lets Mokuba sleep in bed with her)
EnsTren: (and the next day she puts a small little thing in her
ear, like a hearing aid and calls seth to the room with a phone in
it, one that he's hooked up and tells him he can call, but she's
going to stay right here and watch and listen)
Edmondia: (and he falls to his knees and thanks her
profusely)
EnsTren: (And she pulls and tucks her arms to her chest and
backs away frightened and nervous of the quick movement.)
Edmondia: (And he stays still and reverent on the floor, eyes
to the ground, perfectly quiet and content.)
EnsTren: (She's been hurting him and convincing herself that
he was a bigger threat than he really was. That's how panic
attacks work sometimes, escalating ones on reactions by
making mountains out of mole hills and thus she did with her fear
of him, which was mountain enough already.)
EnsTren: (Even now, kneeling and bowing at her feet he
frightens her. Because of one sudden movement. He's not
stupid, he knows that she doesn't trust him at all anymore, but it
still hurts.)
EnsTren: (And she tries to gather up her courage and yells at
him, asking him what is he waiting for, he should call him
already.)
EnsTren: (Trying to be strong.)
Edmondia: (Him staring quietly up at her. "But you're
upset.")
EnsTren: (And she blusters, "I'm always upset when I'm
around you! You are a very upsetting influence!")
Edmondia: (He looks back down at the floor again. "I'm
sorry...")
EnsTren: ("J-just get it over with!")
EnsTren: (She's so frightened but still standing up for herself.
Still strong.)
Edmondia: ("You're upset, though, I won't call him, I'm better
right now.")
EnsTren: ("Shut up and don't lie any more!")
EnsTren: (She growls and tries a threat, because she doesn't
know if she will be able to do this again if they don't do this
right now.)
EnsTren: ("If you don't call him up right now I won't let you
call him again! Ever!")
Edmondia: (He flinches back and tears flood his eyes, but he
shakes his head. "No, I'd upset you more, you don't want me to
talk to him so I won't.")
EnsTren: (Even his refusal frightened her.)
Edmondia: (And he very quietly started to cry.)
EnsTren: ("You'll talk to him right now, right now you hear!?"
The whites all around her irises were visible and her eyes
moved around very very quickly, head turning slightly to
increase her range of vision. She was starting to hyperventilate
and took an unconcious step away from him.)
Edmondia: ("B-but you don't want me to," he whimpered,
"You think I'll hurt you if I do...")
EnsTren: ("Or do you think me so stupid and addle-brained
from drugs and fear that I wouldn't have taken precautions in
this?")
Edmondia: (He blinked up at her, still crying. "Just tell me
what I can do that will make you happy?")
EnsTren: ("There's nothing you can do that will make me
happy, not even dying.")
Edmondia: ("...I'm sorry," he whispered again, and buried his
face in his hands and sobbed.)
EnsTren: (She wanted to tell him to stop crying, but she
wasn't sure if he would stop. And if she told him not to and he
didn't then that would be control taken away.)
Edmondia: (And she didn't know what to do.)
EnsTren: (He was frightening her again.)
Edmondia: (Sad and broken and sobbing before her, on his
knees in complete - nearly complete submission.)
EnsTren: (And it frightened her.)
Edmondia: (What was she supposed to do with him?)
EnsTren: (Besides hurt him and be frightened of him.)
Edmondia: (He was... just there for her to... what?)
EnsTren: (She didn't know.)
Edmondia: (He smiled when she hit him and he cried when he
had nightmares and he prayed in the mornings and he was...
why was he there?)
EnsTren: (To take up space? To frighten her? To be hurt
and fear and pray?)
Edmondia: (He was so strange!)
EnsTren: (Strange and frightening and she didn't understand
him at all.)
Edmondia: (He wasn't like other boys, she knew that much.)
EnsTren: (But he touched her, he wanted to touch her again,
put it in her--because all boys wanted that.)
Edmondia: (But he... cried.)
EnsTren: (But... despite what Gozaburo said, boys did
cry--she supposed.)
Edmondia: (Seth certainly didn't have any problems with
crying. But... he was strange and... different and he confused
her so much...)
EnsTren: (...She wondered what his nightmares were.)
Edmondia: (...she could make him tell her.)
EnsTren: (...should she?)
Edmondia: (...it would hurt him, wouldn't it?)
EnsTren: (But didn't she want that?)
Edmondia: (He was being quiet, now, staring out the window,
lips moving in a silent prayer, coppery bangs almost hiding his
eyes from her sight. He didn't like it when she interrupted his
prayers - but he never complained, either.)
EnsTren: (So she waited--and tried to read his lips, to decipher
if it were some curse against her.)
Edmondia: (...oh. That was a spell of protection for Mokuba.)
EnsTren: (...That was nice.)
Edmondia: (And... another one, for his health.)
EnsTren: (It confused her. She hated being confused.)
Edmondia: (And... a prayer for... the pharaoh's heart? Yugi?)
EnsTren: (She twitched. Could he talk to them like this?)
Edmondia: (...he wouldn't have been as upset earlier if he
could.)
EnsTren: (...Maybe it was harder or more ambiguous?)
Edmondia: (...or maybe it was just a prayer?)
EnsTren: (...She didn't trust him.)
Edmondia: (...and he did not have to call the pharaoh
'beloved of the gods and the kingdom' in that prayer, he was
just sucking up! ...to someone who wasn't there.)
EnsTren: (Maybe he thought that he could hear, after all weren't
the pharaohs considered gods? ...She wondered what he called
her though.)
Edmondia: (...daughter of Hathor? He really was sucking up
- and he did not have to keep caalling her 'beloved dawn' either!)
EnsTren: (It was upsetting in a strange way.)
Edmondia: (He was... being so... so...)
EnsTren: (Irritating and confusing.)
Edmondia: (Sitting in the sunlight with his hair hanging in his
eyes and a tiny smile curving his moving lips and looking to the
sky and praying and... and...)
EnsTren: (Her hands clenched into fists.)
Edmondia: (...but he always prayed...)
EnsTren: (She didn't know why it made her angry sometimes
though. But anger was something she could control, and anger
and hate were better than fear.)
Edmondia: (He was quiet and still again, staring silently at the
sky. He was so... quiet for a boy...)
EnsTren: (It made her nervous.)
Edmondia: (What did he think about? His pharaoh? Yugi?
...her?)
EnsTren: (She didn't like that. Boys thinking about her was
fine--but not when they knew she was a girl.)
Edmondia: (...he was so sad all the time.)
EnsTren: (That made her a little happy. When he was sad he
didn't smile.)
Edmondia: (...at least not that smile that was warm and bright
and made his eyes lighten and his face soften.)
EnsTren: (Seth was crazy.)
Edmondia: (...he hugged Mokuba sometimes.)
EnsTren: (Mokuba liked it though--which is why she allowed
it.)
Edmondia: (...and Mokuba had once told her that Seth had
told him stories about being little and taking care of his cousin.)
EnsTren: (It made her twitch. He was stealing Mokuba away
from her! ...But Mokuba was his own person so she let him
choose.)
EnsTren: (She hated being confused, being confused was a
huge opening for you to get hurt.)
Edmondia: (...why didn't he want to hurt her?)
EnsTren: (No! He did want to hurt her! He was just... biding
his time.)
EnsTren: (Yes that was it, biding his time, getting more
information, more things to hurt her with. Going for the kill,
going for her heart. Well! She wouldn't trust him again, or even
like him! So he couldn't hurt her heart then.)
Edmondia: (...his eyes were so sad.)
EnsTren: (...Because it wasn't going according to plan! She'd
have to keep hurting him, cowing him enough that he wouldn't
dare hurt her physically. He obviously did want to hurt her that
way too. Didn't he touch her in ways that she hated and made
her feel dirty and worse?)
Edmondia: (...hadn't he broken their deal and never touched
her since?)
EnsTren: (She hated arguing with herself. It confused her
and distracted her and made her doubt herself.)
Edmondia: (But... he was... it was his fault for making her feel
this way!)
EnsTren: (Yes!)
EnsTren: (It was all his fault.)
EnsTren: "Stop staring into space and get on the damned
phone."
Edmondia: Those brilliant eyes blinked at her. "As you
would, my lady," he murmured, and bowed his head to her.
EnsTren: She observed with trepidation. Ready to bolt and
ready to scream and ready to attack.
Edmondia: He picked up the phone.
EnsTren: She didn't fidget but stared at him like a cobra with
its hood flared.
Edmondia: He dialed the number for the game shop and lifted
the receiver to his ear.
EnsTren: His hikari, his dawn and day break and savior and
goddess did not blink.
Edmondia: A click on the other line, a soft inquiry, and he
couldn't keep back a fond smile. "Hi, Yugi. Is my cousin
around?"
Edmondia: "...what do you MEAN he's still asleep?!"