EnsTren: (hi)
EnsTren returned at 1:38:47 PM.
Edmondia: (hi)
Edmondia: (how be?)
EnsTren: (*wiggles toes* okay, you?)
Edmondia: (good)
EnsTren: (how are the setotesi)
Edmondia: (cuddly)
EnsTren: (yugis?)
Edmondia: (Yugi's depressed and being doted upon)
EnsTren: (what the feelings towards and about seto?)
Edmondia: (like seto, worried about seto)
Edmondia: (upset)
EnsTren: (what was with the twin thing?)
Edmondia: (yugi being odd but sincere)
EnsTren: (what did he think of the place seto was at)
Edmondia: (it freaked him out)
EnsTren: (ah?)
Edmondia: (wouldn't it freak you out?)
EnsTren: (yes)
Edmondia: (so yugi's disturbed and sympathetic)
EnsTren: (what does he think of the misrablness he
inflicted by "ruining" that place)
Edmondia: (he's incredibly unhappy)
EnsTren: (did he like the lasagna?)
Edmondia: (yes)
EnsTren: (uhm...letsee...oh yeah you don't play a good
therapist)
Edmondia: (Sarah lost her temper)
EnsTren: (I know that)
Edmondia: (heh, sorry)
EnsTren: (is alright)
EnsTren: (but it's not what seto needed)
Edmondia: (sorry)
Edmondia: (what does she need?)
EnsTren: (cognitive therapy)
EnsTren: (one of the things is that she'd be on SRIs or
something but since well the horomons no one wants to
risk it)
Edmondia: (this is your area of expertise, not mine)
EnsTren: (yeah, there's an ideal in therapy you know?)
EnsTren: ("Unconditional positive reguard")
EnsTren: (Not everyone uses it but it's pretty big.)
EnsTren: (and seto's not on ANY medications for the
simple fact that there might be sideeffects or they won't
work)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (also, questioning of "why")
EnsTren: (like there's this thing in my book, this woman
is paranoid)
EnsTren: (and she's saying how these people make
noise and are going to hurt her)
EnsTren: (therapist asks if they have hurt her, are where
the noises coming from near her, why does she think
they will hurt her)
EnsTren: (and she says "It's just agervating")
EnsTren: (and he's all "So it's agervating, not
threatening?" and she's "yeah, I guess")
EnsTren: (you get the idea)
Edmondia: (yeah)
EnsTren: (like when they were getting her used to seth
with his hands on her breats)
EnsTren: (well that conversation would have gone along
the lines of why it frightens her and stuff)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (really seto should be ON something for this
depression)
EnsTren: (but she can't be)
Edmondia: (yeah)
Edmondia: (class)
Edmondia: (back)
EnsTren: (Yay!)
Edmondia: (how be our seto-things?)
EnsTren: (sad, but she cheered up with the shortcake
and a glass of milk)
EnsTren: (how are yugithings?)
Edmondia: (yugi all quiet and sad, yami all snuggly and
affectionate)
EnsTren: (what does yamithing think of what Yugi said
was in setothing's head?)
Edmondia: (thinks seth has work cut out for him)
EnsTren: (What do they think of shortcake for
breakfast?)
Edmondia: (yum)
EnsTren: (in my head seth's insiting on carrying Seto)
Edmondia: (mmm, can see that)
EnsTren: (does not want to let go of his hikari)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (Seto's not looking at the yugis)
EnsTren: (she's afraid of what she'll see on their faces)
EnsTren: (pity, disgust, or them kissing each other
because her hurts are too below their notice)
Edmondia: (aww)
EnsTren: (and she really would be hurt by the last one
but doesn't want to think of why)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
Edmondia: (and yugis are being v. v. quiet)
EnsTren: (and seto is all "lalala no one is here")
EnsTren: (each verse interspaced with a bit of self pity
or self hatred.)
Edmondia: (and seth?)
EnsTren: ()doting
EnsTren: (doteing)
Edmondia: (ah)
EnsTren: (Seto acknowledges him sometiems)
EnsTren: (mostly it's the wall)
Edmondia: (ah)
EnsTren: (she's there but not)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
Edmondia: (same with yugi)
EnsTren: (can yami snap yugi out of it?)
Edmondia: (maybe)
EnsTren: (seto's all sad)
Edmondia: (poor thing)
EnsTren: (hasn't eaten half of her food and laying her
head against Seth and not reacting)
Edmondia: (...yugi's doing the exact same thing)
EnsTren: (not on seth I hope)
Edmondia: (no, on yami)
EnsTren: (and how is yami?)
EnsTren: (cause I can see him getting angry and
blaming seto for upseting his aibou)
Edmondia: (I dunno... think he'd be more concered with
getting his aibou un-upset)
EnsTren: (seto is the reason aibou IS upset)
Edmondia: (yes, but he's not going to bite her head off)
EnsTren: (I hope he doesn't try looming either, that
won't go overwell in her paranoid "men hurt me"
thoughts)
Edmondia: (he's five foot three, he can't loom any better than
I can)
EnsTren: (She's sitting down in Seth's lap feeing
horrible and he can radiate menace when he's not even
trying to.)
Edmondia: (I seriously doubt he's going to be evil to her)
EnsTren: (he frightens her, but doesn't sexually threaten
her. Notice their confrontations, she's usually across a
dueling arena from him.)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (so he'd get to see her reaction to him, a flash
of terror before it's hidden)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (I think that might hurt 'temu)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (And set him wondering if she was always
frightened)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (and then goes to hug aibou)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (nd maybe having Seth rescue flashbacks)
Edmondia: (?)
Edmondia: (why?)
EnsTren: (what he saw in her eyes)
Edmondia: (ah)
EnsTren: (instinctive fear)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (and having a bit of sethisms)
Edmondia: (having a bith of sethisms?)
EnsTren: (wishing the people who did this were alive so
he could punish them)
Edmondia: (ah)
EnsTren: (I think he might be a bit possessive of seto as
his prime rival)
Edmondia: (I think he is a bit possessive of seto)
EnsTren: (and people hurt her so she was afraid of him
and won't play against him anymore)
EnsTren: (How dare they harm his challenge/reduce her
player level)
Edmondia: (mmhmm)
EnsTren: (you have to talk now!)
EnsTren: (It's my turn to mmhmmm)
Edmondia: (so sleeeeeeeeeeeeeepy)
Edmondia: (do I have to?)
EnsTren: (well...yes)
EnsTren: (just splurge thoughts while I go eat)
Edmondia: (splurge thoughts...)
EnsTren: (yes)
Edmondia: (okies)
Edmondia: (...the only coherent thought I have is that I too
would like some strawberry shortcake)
Edmondia: (and now, food.)
Edmondia: (back)
EnsTren: (your brain is empty)
Edmondia: (not as much as it used to be)
EnsTren: (so what are your thoughts on yami and
seto?)
Edmondia: (he's concerned about her, and quite protective)
EnsTren: (and possessive)
Edmondia: (that too)
Edmondia: (not only is she his best and most honorable rival,
she's also his cousin's wife)
EnsTren: (the whys intrest me, or the whys in his head)
Edmondia: (the whys in his head?)
Edmondia: (why so possessive, you mean?)
EnsTren: (yeah, and why he cognates why he is
possessive)
Edmondia: (well, he's possessive because a. she's his favorite
rival, b. she's his favorite rival, and c. she's now part of his
family)
Edmondia: (and since she's in a vulnerable state, he's even
more growly)
EnsTren: (and is he wondering if she was always afraid
when dueling him?)
Edmondia: (I don't think she was really afraid, exactly)
EnsTren: (something holding her back, something
preventing all her attention from being on her)
Edmondia: (huh?)
Edmondia: (explain please)
EnsTren: (on him)
EnsTren: (distracted)
EnsTren: (instead of being afraid nervous)
Edmondia: (mmm - I suppose)
Edmondia: (he's a different kind of threat)
EnsTren: (what are his cognations on seth versus seto
on the favorite rival thing?)
Edmondia: (seth and he haven't fought or played the way
they used to in this time)
EnsTren: (because seto takes up all his attention, yet
another reason to be worried about her)
Edmondia: (mmhmm. so he's growly-possessive-protective,
not quite as much as he would be if it were seth, but close)
EnsTren: (if both were at top form which one would
give him the largest run for his money?)
Edmondia: (probably seth, for he remembers dirty tricks and
can make him laugh in the middle of a duel)
EnsTren: (but seth knows he can't beat atemu)
Edmondia: (true. so perhaps seto, for that bull-headed
determination.)
EnsTren: (that will ALWAYS try to beat him)
Edmondia: (so then seto)
EnsTren: (...that will make her feel better)
Edmondia: (that'
Edmondia: (that's good)
EnsTren: (and she's poke seth, with Whys)
Edmondia: (oh?)
EnsTren: (why me, why not you?)
EnsTren: (have to be careful there)
EnsTren: (to avoid her getting it into her head that it's
because she's so "bullhead" and other negitive things)
Edmondia: (he's being very cute and pc)
Edmondia: ('it's your determination!')
EnsTren: ("The Mutt gets his tail handed to him all the
time and keeps on trying.")
Edmondia: ("...so?")
EnsTren: ("So it can't be my determination")
Edmondia: ("You're more clever.")
EnsTren: ("You're just as smart as me.")
Edmondia: ("Yugi has informed me that my method of attack
is "Hulk Smash!")
EnsTren: (Her eyes lowered, "I used a power deck
too.")
Edmondia: ("Yes, but yours actually had more than just 'I
keeeeeeeeeeeeel you!' to it.")
EnsTren: ("The hell?")
Edmondia: ("Yours was actually clever and useful, baby.")
EnsTren: (She fidgeted.)
Edmondia: ("Plus I technically don't own a deck...")
EnsTren: ("You're an idiot.")
Edmondia: ("Is it my fault the shrine is probably buried under
three thousand years' worth of sand?")
EnsTren: ("Yami, idiot, do you have any idea how
many cards I have?")
Edmondia: ("...lots?")
EnsTren: ("More than that.")
Edmondia: (He rolled his eyes. "Can I summon my
sword-guy?")
EnsTren: ("No, deal with it.")
Edmondia: (He pouted.)
EnsTren: ("Yami?")
Edmondia: ("Yes?")
EnsTren: ("You have a swordguy, so what's mine?")
Edmondia: ("Your ka?")
EnsTren: ("Yeah, if that's what I'm talking about.")
Edmondia: ("Ours might be the same.")
EnsTren: ("But I don't like swords.")
Edmondia: ("Then we may be different.")
EnsTren: ("I still don't understand.")
Edmondia: ("How so?")
Edmondia: ("The monster is drawn from your soul.")
EnsTren: ("No, I don't understand why I am
preferable.")
Edmondia: ("Cause you're more of a challenge.")
Edmondia: ("Plus you have much less of an inclination to
make silly faces across the dueling field.")
EnsTren: (She stared at him for the last comment.)
Edmondia: ("...in our defense it was really really early in the
morning.")
EnsTren: (She blinked and started walking away, shaking
her head at the weirdness.)
Edmondia: ("I'm not weird! I'm special!")
EnsTren: ("You know they call teenagers who can't
count to ten special too, right?")
Edmondia: (He gave her a mock-glare. "You get a
five-second head start.")
EnsTren: (He had forgotton how fast hikari could run!)
Edmondia: ("One... Two... ThreeFourFive!" And he raced
after her.)
EnsTren: (Damn her for climbing out of windows.)
Edmondia: (She was littler, it was easier for her. But he
managed to wriggle out - his shirt wasn't so fortunate.)
EnsTren: (Hikari could climb very well.)
Edmondia: (But so could he! ...sort of.)
EnsTren: (He couldn't let her get to the chimneys!)
Edmondia: (But she was faster - hm. Could he play dirty?
Would she care?)
EnsTren: (He didn't know.)
Edmondia: (Oh hikari...)
EnsTren: (She didn't stop fleeing but he felt her
questioning thought.)
Edmondia: (My shirt's gone, do you know where it is?)
EnsTren: (Caught in the window is my guess. )
Edmondia: (You have a perverted wind- oh for the love of-
hikari, tell this shingle to let go of my pants!)
EnsTren: (Why should I? She did slow slightly. He
had forgotton his hikari was depressingly used to dirty
tricks.)
Edmondia: (Do you really want me running around on the
roof in only my underwear?)
Edmondia: (...Not that I wouldn't be happy to do so for you,
my love.)
EnsTren: (Hentai.)
Edmondia: (And this is bad because...?)
EnsTren: (Bah. By the way, how do I win?)
Edmondia: (Pounce on your opponent and proceed to do
unspeakable things to him.)
EnsTren: (Ah. And she disappeared from his sight.)
Edmondia: (...I suddenly feel very very afraid. And he
promptly unbuckled his belt.)
EnsTren: (There was no answer, where was she?)
Edmondia: (Yup, he was screwed. He shimmied out of his
pants as quickly as he could and kicked off his shoes, casting a
nervous glance around him.)
EnsTren: (Maybe he should get indoors and continue
the hunt there.)
Edmondia: (The roof really wasn't the best place for running
about with no shoes on, after all.)
EnsTren: Pity he couldn't go down chimneys like hikari.
Edmondia: But he was agile enough that leaping off the roof
was an option.
EnsTren: And then he climbed back in the house.
Edmondia: And then he glanced around soundlesslly,
half-expecting to be pounced upon.
Edmondia: Hikari?
EnsTren: Silence. He was feeling paranoid.
Edmondia: But a hikari-pouncing could be quite enjoyable...
EnsTren: But he had to find her to do so.
Edmondia: Here, kitty, kitty...
EnsTren: Make a pussy joke and die.
Edmondia: Please. I do have some taste.
EnsTren: Really?
Edmondia: Yes, really.
EnsTren: ...You sure?
Edmondia: ...just a little bit, but yes, I am.
EnsTren: He was knocked face first to the floor.
Edmondia: Hello, rug.
EnsTren: Hello, Seth.
Edmondia: Hello, Seto.
EnsTren: I win.
Edmondia: I noticed. Now what are you going to do with
me, hmm?
EnsTren: Sit on you.
Edmondia: Where on me?
EnsTren: She sat on his lower back in a lotus position.
Edmondia: Bah, that's no fun. He propped his chin on his
hands and wriggled to get more comfortable. I was hoping you
were going to tie me up and do X-rated things to me.
EnsTren: This is crueler.
Edmondia: Tease.
EnsTren: Damn right.
Edmondia: I'll get you back for this, kitten.
EnsTren: Meow.
Edmondia: He purred.
EnsTren: Prrr...
Edmondia: Tease.
EnsTren: Heeheehee...
Edmondia: Evil kitty-wench.
EnsTren: I'm not a wench!
Edmondia: But you are a tease.
EnsTren: Yes.
Edmondia: Bah. If I'd have caught you...
EnsTren: She licked his ear.
Edmondia: He squirmed. Prrr, baby.
EnsTren: You sounded like Austin Powers just then.
Don't do it again.
Edmondia: Austin who?
EnsTren: Character in a braincell killing movies.
Edmondia: Sorry, baby. Let me make it up to you?
EnsTren: She moved off of him. Please?
Edmondia: He rolled over and arranged himself in a way that
was distinctly aesthetically pleasing. You caught me baby,
you're not supposed to ask, you're supposed to order.
EnsTren: He didn't know it was possible to blush and
pale at the same time.
EnsTren: ...Would you have ordered me if you
caught me?
Edmondia: Nope.
EnsTren: She relaxed a little but her voice was very
quiet. "Promise?"
Edmondia: "Promise."
EnsTren: A sigh of relief. "Why should I... you?"
Edmondia: He tossed her a lazy, sultry grin, the kind that
made her toes curl and her cheeks blush. "Why not?"
EnsTren: "I don't... I don't want you to so why?"
Edmondia: "Is there really nothing you want from me?"
EnsTren: "You already give it to me though."
Edmondia: He propped himself on his elbows, amused.
"Baby, there's practically a neon sign flashing above my head
that says, 'My body is yours! Do with me as you will!'"
EnsTren: She flushed prettily. "Kiss my forehead?"
Edmondia: "As you wish." And he lifted himself up farther,
deliberately giving her a good view of his muscles (not that he
was vain, oh no) and brushed a kiss over her forehead.
EnsTren: She sighed happily and tugged him closer to
her.
Edmondia: He had the feeling that this encounter was going
to be more snuggly than sultry.
EnsTren: He couldn't bring himself to feel bad though.
Edmondia: "What is your desire, my light?"
EnsTren: "I have no want of anything."
Edmondia: "No want of anything?" he murmured, voice
nothing more than a suggestive purr.
EnsTren: "I'm content," she murmured, the seduction
going right over her head as she moved closer to be
completely enveloped in his arms.
Edmondia: He repressed a sigh and made a mental note to
figure out a different plan of attack the next time he wanted to
seduce her. "I'm glad, baby," he murmured, and pulled her close
against him.
EnsTren: And she was happy and content in his arms,
her light unclouded.
Edmondia: It was... nice.
EnsTren: It wasn't lovemaking.
Edmondia: But it was nice.
EnsTren: This was... the way it was supposed to be.
Edmondia: Soft and warm and right.
EnsTren: He wished they could be this way all the time.
Edmondia: Love you, pretty light.
Edmondia: Because what else could he say?
EnsTren: They were the only words sure not to be taken
the wrong way and destroy this moment.
Edmondia: He stroked her hair and pressed a kiss against her
cheek.
EnsTren: She was smiling.
Edmondia: You're beautiful, he told her, because it was true.
EnsTren: She didn't argue this time.
Edmondia: He held her close and rested his cheek against her
hair.
EnsTren: He was holding her while she was awake, and
she wasn't sad, wasn't crying, wasn't screaming.
Edmondia: It was good and diffrent and right.
Edmondia: He wanted to kiss her, to hold her and touch her and
make love to her, but he couldn't tell her that. He wasn't going
to ruin this.
EnsTren: She might get upset, she might hurt, she might
think that's all he ever wanted.
Edmondia: She'd never know that he wanted her more like
this than any other time with her sly-eyed kitten looks. She
would never know why.
EnsTren: He was afraid sometimes, and only
sometimes, when she was sobbing inconsolable, cold
untouchable, or raging unmoveable, that she couldn't
know why.
EnsTren: He worried it was, despite her brillance,
beyond her, because of all her wounds.
Edmondia: He worried he would not be enough to heal her.
EnsTren: She was happy, she was conent, yet he had
the urge to cry.
Edmondia: He mustn't cry, that would upset her, that would
ruin her happiness and destroy her peace and he mustn't
mustn't ever let that happen.
EnsTren: He had already ruined so much of her.
Edmondia: He had to be strong for her, had to lock it down
close and tight and maybe later when she was away or asleep
he could go to his cousin and sob until he was sick. But now
he had to be strong for her.
EnsTren: Because she was so happy...
Edmondia: He wasn't going to cry!
EnsTren: She turned to took up at him, pretty perfect
wonderful face turned up to see his. She wasn't smiling
though, but he didn't feel any wetness on his cheeks and
his eyes weren't blurry yet.
EnsTren: She touched his cheek with the palm of her
hand.
EnsTren: What's wrong, beloved?
Edmondia: He closed his eyes against the lovely sight. He
mustn't cry. He mustn't cry. He mustn't cry.
EnsTren: She was happy now, content and not sad and
unobscured light--so she could act like one now, heal
him. It was tempting tempting--more tempting when she
had offered that damning deal.
EnsTren: She pulled herself to him, pressing close in a
way that was guilessly innocent, sensual and not at the
same time. Beloved?
EnsTren: She was light.
Edmondia: He wasn't going to cry. He wasn't.
EnsTren: Beloved, what is wrong?
EnsTren: Even... even if you don't want to speak,
please let it out. You hurt inside.
Edmondia: He bit his lip and shook his head wordlessly.
Mustn't cry, mustn't tell - she'd be hurt.
EnsTren: She kissed his forehead.
Edmondia: Then - oh no oh no he wasn't crying, he wasn't!
EnsTren: He was. And she held him and stroked his
hair and was still bright as he dreamed.
Edmondia: He clung to her blindly and sobbed.
EnsTren: Her light flowed into him undepleted,
unhoarded.
Edmondia: Precious and brilliant and blinding and wonderful
and right.
Edmondia: It made him cry harder.
EnsTren: And still the light came.
Edmondia: He wanted to tell her, wanted to tell her
everything, but he couldn't, because that would make her sad,
would steal her light and her warmth away and leave him alone
again.
EnsTren: And she didn't ask.
Edmondia: ...gods help him, he wanted her so much...
EnsTren: She gave him everything he needed now but
her body.
Edmondia: He couldn't ask that of her, and hated himself for
wanting her.
EnsTren: Because it hurt her. Because when he hadn't
controlled himself he had hurt her as much as it would
have hurt him.
Edmondia: Even if she loved him now - no! He wasn't going
to hurt her again!
EnsTren: Wasn't going to risk destroying her.
Edmondia: They had worked too hard, too hard for him to
screw this up now.
EnsTren: Because if he screwed up she'd kill herself
and have no reason to pull back from oblivion again.
Edmondia: He had to keep himself under control. He had to
stop crying and stop wanting and stop needing her like this - he
wasn't going to risk losing her, not again!
EnsTren: "shhh...You can cry."
Edmondia: No, no, he couldn't!
EnsTren: "You need to."
Edmondia: Need didn't matter, he had to stop, he had to stop!
EnsTren: She kissed his forehead again.
Edmondia: No... no, he was going to hurt her, he was going
to make her cry again, she was too good and sweet and perfect
for him, he would break her and he didn't want her to cry!
EnsTren: "Cry for me."
Edmondia: He shook his head as hard as he could, trying to
get the tears to stop flowing. No - can't cry, it'll hurt you, don't
you see that I'll break you again?
EnsTren: Cry.
Edmondia: I'll hurt you!
EnsTren: Only weep. Please, so you won't hurt
inside.
Edmondia: I'm sorry! he wailed, and hid his face in her neck.
I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!
EnsTren: She rubbed his back and held him close and
warm and gave him her light.
Edmondia: He clung to her tight and bit his lip to keep his
hands from wandering.
EnsTren: She was Isis now, not Hathor or Bastet. She
was a mother, not a lover.
Edmondia: He couldn't dishonor that. He mustn't.
EnsTren: Mustn't risk harming.
Edmondia: Damn it, he needed to stay still!
EnsTren: She kissed his forehead.
Edmondia: Love you. So much.
EnsTren: Love you forever.
Edmondia: You won't.
Edmondia: He buried his lips against her throat and tried to
stop sobbing.
EnsTren: She held him and the light did not leave.
Edmondia: Maybe... maybe... it would be okay?
EnsTren: He had to hope.
Edmondia: She was strong, she was capable...
Edmondia: She was light.
Edmondia: Please don't hate me...
EnsTren: I don't.
Edmondia: But you will!
EnsTren: I don't.
Edmondia: But you will, you'll hate me!
EnsTren: Why, pretty Yami?
Edmondia: I can't tell you you'll hate me!
EnsTren: She kissed him on the nose.
Edmondia: ...promise not to scream?
EnsTren: Hai.
Edmondia: A-and n-not to h-hate me r-right away?
EnsTren: I promise.
EnsTren: She pet his hair and smiled soothingly.
Edmondia: P-please d-don't blame yourself for this e-either.
It's... it's m-my fault...
EnsTren: Alright, pretty mine. She kissed his
forehead and her hands felt so good in his hair and on his
back.
Edmondia: A-and d-don't f-feel guilty, either.
EnsTren: Okay.
EnsTren: She was so serene.
Edmondia: ...I love you.
EnsTren: She smiled brightly. I love you.
Edmondia: He bit his lip and choked down a fresh bout of
tears. I - I love you and I love you so much... I d-don't want to
make you cry anymore. I - I don't ever ever ever want to hurt
you or scare you or make you unhappy. I - I was trying not to
cry, I was, I was trying to be good for you but I - I love you so
much and I'm so sorry!
EnsTren: She kissed him.
EnsTren: I love you.
Edmondia: He clung to her exactly as he had sworn he
wouldn't, but he managed to keep his hands from straying. I - I
love you t-too, I do, I do I do I do I do forever and ever and
ever and please please please I don't want to scare you but
y-you're my wife and you - you have a right to know but please
I don't want you to think that I wanted this all along or that it
w-was... s-something b-bad or dirty - I mean it was but only
because I - it's all my fault I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!
EnsTren: Her hands and smile never wavered, her light
was bright as ever. She kissed him, chaste. I love you,
I love you. Don't worry, forever I love you. I may
get angry but I love you.
Edmondia: I love you, I love you - I - I don't want you to be
angry but I know you will be and I know why and I'm sorry but
please don't kiss me right now, I'm bad and you shouldn't
because I - I - oh gods I'm so sorry...
EnsTren: She kissed his forehead again.
Edmondia: I - I love you a-and that's why I'm g-going to tell
you even though you'll be mad at me and n-not want me
anymore - I - I said I'd be honest so I'll be honest and I - I love
you...
EnsTren: I love you too.
Edmondia: Please don't be afraid of me.
Edmondia: I - you - y-you're... you're so... so light... I - I think
I'm drowning and it's so nice and I love you I love you so much
so much so much...
EnsTren: Enveloped, flowing, filled, drowning.
EnsTren: She was heaven. Didn't the westerners
believe in some virginal heavenly mother?
Edmondia: A-and I...
EnsTren: She held him and smiled and stroked his hair.
Edmondia: I...
EnsTren: She was calm.
Edmondia: Ohpleasegodsdon'thateme!
EnsTren: I promised I wouldn't.
Edmondia: W-will I s-scare you?
EnsTren: I don't know.
Edmondia: I d-don't w-want to scare you. I d-don't want you
to think t-that I - I'm j-just trying to - to... to get into your pants
or something!
EnsTren: She stopped, everything stopped.
Edmondia: I'M SORRY! he wailed, and flung himself away
from her, sobbing hysterically.
EnsTren: And she flung herself after him.
EnsTren: She held him tighttight in her arms and
tighttight in her light.
EnsTren: "Shhhh...."
Edmondia: I'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorry! he
whimpered, trying to squirm from her arms,
I'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorry!
EnsTren: IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou!
EnsTren: She would not let go. Shhh... I was shocked,
that's all. W-what matters is that you d-didn't
a-a-act on it. Thank you. I love you.
Edmondia: B-but I wanted to! You were so happy and so
pretty and so light and I wanted you sosososomuch it hurt, it
hurts! I'm bad for you, I'm trying to be good but it's not
working and I love you so much!
EnsTren: Shhh... Shhh... I love you, I promise I love
you. You didn't hurt me.
EnsTren: You didn't even want to hurt me. You
want to do that and make it good, not hurt.
Edmondia: B-but you d-don't w-want. S-so I'm b-bad for
w-wanting. A-and I upset you a-and you were so happy and
pretty and nice and bright and I upset you and I screwed up
again and I'm sorry!
EnsTren: Yamimine, do I seem upset to you?
EnsTren: W-what you wanted. It's natural. It's
natural. Not bad for you.
Edmondia: He shook his head frantically. N-no. You d-don't
want. B-bad.
EnsTren: Only if you act on it without permission.
Edmondia: B-but I s-scared you.
EnsTren: I didn't have enough time to be frightened.
I was shocked and you moved so fast.
Edmondia: Y-you s-shouldn't h-have to t-touch me.
EnsTren: I have to, and I want to. You don't hurt
me, you make me feel good.
EnsTren: Hmnn? Remember how I curl around you
hand because I like it? How I seek you out for your
touch. You don't hurt.
Edmondia: B-but I w-want... a-and you're s-scared...
EnsTren: Shhh...
Edmondia: B-but...
EnsTren: Shush. I love you.
Edmondia: L-love you. T-too much.
EnsTren: No such thing.
Edmondia: He managed a tiny, trembling smile. I - you
d-don't know h-how much...
EnsTren: She kissed his lips, chaste, but kissed them.
Edmondia: ...I love you.
EnsTren: I love you.
Edmondia: ...I was s-so scared you'd h-hate me...
EnsTren: Never.
Edmondia: I d-don't ever want to hurt you again.
EnsTren: You didn't hurt me this time.
Edmondia: B-but I could have.
EnsTren: You didn't.
Edmondia: B-but you...
EnsTren: Action and intent matters most.
Edmondia: B-but I...
EnsTren: Shhh...
Edmondia: ...thank you, he whispered, and hid his face in her
hair. Angel, ankh, beloved goddess-mine...
EnsTren: She held him.
Edmondia: ...how did I ever live without you?
EnsTren: How did I without you?
Edmondia: ...I love you so much... you make it so hard for me
to breathe...
EnsTren: You make it worth breathing.
Edmondia: ...you're so beautiful...
EnsTren: I love you.
Edmondia: I love you.
EnsTren: She nuzzled him. Come on then, let's get up
off the floor.
Edmondia: He sniffled. Okay...
EnsTren: She kissed him and helped him up.
Edmondia: He clung to her, seeking wordless reassurance.
EnsTren: She gave it to him without hesitation.
Edmondia: ...I really didn't scare you?
EnsTren: It was too fast to scare me.
EnsTren: And I was sheltered by my own shock
reaction.
Edmondia: ...do I scare you, now that you know?
EnsTren: ...You're not acting on it.
Edmondia: ...but do I scare you?
EnsTren: Sometimes. I don't want to lie to you.
EnsTren: But less, much less, than before.
Edmondia: ...I'm sorry.
EnsTren: I love you.
EnsTren: She didn't say it wasn't his fault, she didn't say
that it was all right. After all, she didn't want to lie to him.
EnsTren: I forgive you.
Edmondia: ...thank you.
Edmondia: I love you.
EnsTren: She kissed him.
Edmondia: ...don't.
Edmondia: I want to touch you too much.
EnsTren: Touch me then, you know how far I can
stand it. You know that I like it.
Edmondia: You don't want me to.
EnsTren: I do...
Edmondia: ...you're not in the mood, I don't blame you...
Edmondia: I wouldn't want me either.
EnsTren: I want you, I love you. And you are very
good at putting me in the mood.
EnsTren: Let's go take a hot bath together and play
with the bubbles.
Edmondia: ...okay.
EnsTren: She smiled and lead him.
Edmondia: He smiled shyly for her and followed.
EnsTren: She reached back and took his hand.
Edmondia: He laced their fingers together. I love you.
EnsTren: And I you, husband.
Edmondia: ...
Edmondia: He blushed.
EnsTren: (sleep is needed)
EnsTren: (nai)
EnsTren is away at 11:29:09 PM.