EnsTren: Seto: *realizes he hasn't typed a byte of
code in over an hour and has just been staring at his
computer screen* *...I'm...sad...*
EnsTren: He abruptly tucked his knees under his chin
and wrapped his arms around his shins. Melancholy,
and he didn't even know why. Correction, he did.
EnsTren: But, he didn't... He always went to his
brother and y--Seth when he was sad, and Mokuba
was on a trip. But... He was the reason why he was
sad.
EnsTren: I'm tired of being angry at him. He
admitted to himself. It still hurts, it makes me shake.
But I'm tired of being angry at him. I'm tired and
all that seems left is the sadness.
EnsTren: He unfolded himself and stood up. I'm tired
of being angry, and now I'm sad. All I want right
now is to feel better and fuck the rest of it.
EnsTren: He walked slowly out of the room, following
the faint thread, rarely touched, to his Yami.
EnsTren: And he followed it, to find him.
Edmondia: He found him sprawled out on the floor in one of
the guest bedrooms, lying in the pool of sunlight that spilled
through the window.
EnsTren: He crouched down, peering at him with one
eye, watching him and taking him in. Most of him was hidden except half of his face, low to the ground.
EnsTren: Maybe this would be enough. Just to watch
him and be close. He wasn't sure anymore what his
Yami would do. Maybe he would punish him now that
he had come back? Better to stay away. Taking
comfort only with the eyes.
Edmondia: Pretty eyes.
EnsTren: Pretty Yami.
EnsTren: He silently crawled over to him, no, not
crawled because his knees never touched the ground,
he moved only on his hands and awkwardly on the balls
of his feet.
Edmondia: His yami never moved.
EnsTren: He paused at the edge of the light and then
moved into it, laying down half on top of him, half off,
tucking his head under Seth's chin.
Edmondia: He could feel Seth inhale sharply, but he made
no move to embrace him.
EnsTren: He nuzzled him lightly, his chest and a little
under his chin before settling down, legs dangerously
close to being "entwined."
Edmondia: Seth breathed out slowly, body loosening.
//...what are you doing?//
EnsTren: He didn't answer, just sighed back, tired, a
little content and perhaps even slightly happy. He
slipped one hand under his arm, near his shoulder,
curling up to grasp, to hold on to him, while the second
hand innocently curled on his chest like a child's.
Edmondia: Slowly, he raised one hand, hesitating before
letting it settle gently into his hair.
EnsTren: He closed his eyes tight, knowing that after
so long he was no longer used to the pain. There was
subtle tensing and then shivering before he relaxed. He
was softly and quickly panting.
Edmondia: Seth shifted uneasily beneath him.
EnsTren: But he remained unmoving, hands tightening
up and that was it. He didn't pull away.
Edmondia: Another touch, rubbing over the material of his
shirt, coming to a halt dangerously low on his back.
EnsTren: Just shivering, letting him touch and pet. He
wasn't sure if he was ready for it to take an intimate turn
yet, but he knew his body often craved the attention.
Edmondia: //...I love you.//
EnsTren: He closed his eyes slowly. Part of him
hissed angrily that he had already threatened to take
his body, that he should leave before he tried
anything--And he very nearly got up and left, it was
only the pain that seized his heart at the thought that
stopped him. Another hissed in self-loathing that he
should just give him his body like how he lied in the
begining.
EnsTren: Then he had another thought. It was the
least he could do, the least his Yami deserved.
/...Love you/
Edmondia: Seth, very quietly, started to cry.
EnsTren: Seto bit his lower lip. Hard, harder, only
stopping when he realized he was tasting blood. He
licked it up absently as he lightly lifted himself up,
unaware of the heart attack he was giving Seth, thinking
that he was going away.
EnsTren: He brushed the tears from his cheeks with
his fingers, looking down at him with an inscrutable
expression, both soft and hard.
Edmondia: Seth stared back up at him soundlessly,
adoration shining clearly in his eyes.
EnsTren: He looked as if he were trying to understand
something, perhaps, there was fondness there too,
mixed with love and an odd... not-ness, as if there was
something missing, something very important. Perhaps
like he didn't know who or what he was looking at or
didn't understand his own or Seth's emotions.
Edmondia: Seth brushed his fingers fleetingly against his
cheek, brows drawing together in faint puzzlement.
EnsTren: His eyes closed tightly and he trembled,
biting the edge of his tongue. He was lying again.
Edmondia: //...please don't do this, ankh...//
EnsTren: Parts of him spoke, he should leave, he
should speak, he should get angry, he should cry.
EnsTren: But he was too tired to pull away, almost too
tired to hold in his pain, but Gozaburo taught him how
to. Too tired to leave this fractured perfection.
EnsTren: He laid his head back down on his chest.
Edmondia: //...please don't hide from me again...//
EnsTren: He held onto his Yami's shirt with a loose
curling grip, lightly held his shoulder, and blinked
rapidly to clear the tears from his eyes, swallowing
convulsively to put the bile tainted food back down
where it belonged.
Edmondia: //...please?//
EnsTren: How was he hiding? He questioned himself,
letting it float up in his mind like a drowning man's last
breath of air.
Edmondia: //...share?//
EnsTren: What?
Edmondia: //Whatever it is that you're feeling... please...//
EnsTren: I don't know.
Edmondia: A soft, mental caress - a kiss he would not grant
him in reality.
EnsTren: He shivered, his walls cracked. Sadness and
tiredness and the identifiable but nameless feeling of
palpably being down in the dumps.
Edmondia: Seth took it all without flinching, and let him pour
it away until he was exhausted and empty.
EnsTren: His eyes were burning and damp. He didn't
move, just tried to absorb from him what he needed.
Edmondia: And softly, slowly, warmth started to seep back
in, bound up in love and tasting like honey on his tongue.
EnsTren: And he tightened, holding him and clinging to
him, upset when he started crying and sobbing like a
child again, but happy at the same time.
Edmondia: If he had been able to see more clearly, he would
have realized that Seth was crying just as hard as he was.
EnsTren: And they held each other and cried, each
soothing the other with their very presence, whole
again.
Edmondia: //...I love you...//
EnsTren: /Love you./
EnsTren: (nai)