November
Nov. 26 (Tue)
Nov. 25 (Mon)
早上很辛苦才能起床﹐天氣很寒冷﹐走去遠遠的NOA Building真的很痛苦﹐不是要交功課的話﹐我想我是不會去﹐睡了整堂課﹐我覺得老師
不停地在看著我﹐但我也控制不了我的眼皮﹐它不知不覺地垂下來。
上完這堂課我決定回家睡覺﹐下午才去那堂CS課﹐睡了五個半小時﹐i really had a really really good, deep nap. 連下午的CS課也有點
不願去﹐不停地給自己藉口﹕外面好冷﹐這樣子出去會著涼的﹔我可以問peggy抄筆記﹐不去也罷﹔睡不飽﹐去了也不過是睡覺而已﹐還是不去好
了。幸好最後我的天使勝了﹐我還是去了﹐今天教蠻難的binary tree remove method﹐不去就很可能不明白發生甚麼事了。
The Mystery of Time and Space
Having one of those days?
Nov. 24 (Sun)
八點四十分﹐Alex鬧鐘響﹐他要打電話給Cathy﹐告訴她自己不會去教會。
十一點半﹐育臻醒來弄飯給我們吃﹐Alex講話很大聲﹐一點多我終於起床﹐吃育臻弄的蔥油餅跟炒飯﹐很好吃呢。謝謝育臻﹗
兩點多回家洗澡﹐原本打算開始寫功課﹐logic功課真的很令人討厭﹐看極都不懂得怎樣做﹐過了不久﹐一位魔鬼打電話來拉我出去打
我不喜歡的籃球﹐我以為這次有那麼多女生去﹐一定有人會打得比我差﹐怎料卻剛剛相反﹐她們體內不知是否全部都有很多籃球細胞﹐
竟然百投百中﹐我真的很無奈﹐天生對球類不知是否有仇﹐真的不明白為何我跟它們這麼合不來﹐不開心 =(
陪安迪吃完晚飯後我決定作這學期第一個突破﹕去圖書館做功課﹐找了安迪來陪我(我怕第一次去圖書館會迷路或是去了一些閑人免進等的傻事)
晚上上街還是有個男生一起走比較好。在那裡待了四個小時﹐到四點終於寫完份功課可以回家睡覺。覺得自己很用功喔﹗
A Woman's Ultimate Fantasy
Wacha In For?
Cats And Men
What Sex Is A Computer?<--the women won! hurray!!!
Nov. 23 (Sat)
一早醒來﹐還是有點頭重腳輕﹐去洗衣房拿回衣服時還是有點兒力不從心﹐只覺我的衣服比平時重幾成﹐可能是心理作用﹐站沒多久腳又開
始軟了﹐但我不甘心看了這麼多天websites﹐到最後卻不能去﹐所以死都要死出門口﹐剛好安迪要去借相機﹐我便趁這個機會試驗一下自己
體力﹐跟他一起走十分鐘去education building check out部DC﹐還爬上三層樓梯﹐我發現自己表現比想象中好﹐真高興 =)
本來約好十二點出發﹐到最後都如我所料一點才可以真正開車﹐在去San Marcas大半個鐘頭路程我都在努力補充不足的睡眠﹐
呵呵﹐睡得很飽呢﹗很久未試過在車上這樣熟睡了﹐這證明司機Aaron是一個好司機。好﹗以後去roadtrips一定要找Aaron。
在San Marcas原定只會逗留一個鐘頭﹐怎料到四點半才能出發去San Antonio﹐在這三個小時內我們大部份時間都在街上走來走去﹐為的是
找食物﹐我只去了NIKE跟SONY這兩間鋪﹐在NIKE買了一件T-Shirt跟短褲(每次來San Marcas我都會買件NIKE T-Shirt﹐今次又怎會例外呢﹖)
找food court都找了差不多整個鐘頭﹐吃完後都已經四點了﹐看看錶﹐我已經可以放棄原本plan好的
三分二觀光地點﹐在剩下的三分一中我們只夠時間去當中的一半地方﹐本來打算上塔頂看日落﹐卻連日落都趕不到﹐唉﹗晚上的San Antonio真的
沒甚麼好玩的﹐我也不知怎計劃下一步行動。
結果我們在riverwalk附近東逛逛﹐西走走﹐見到大家都有點無奈﹐有點悶﹐有點累﹐我有點對不起大家﹐是我安排得不太好﹐逼使大家無無聊聊
跟著我走﹐真有點過意不去。下次我會多作準備﹐想好後備行程﹐這次算是一個學習的機會吧。
晚上去了My Sam吃buffet﹐很多海鮮﹐可惜我們太晚去﹐我吃完我的頭盤時離關門時間只剩下半個小時﹐被逼轉移目標從海鮮轉吃一些飽肚的菜﹐
吃完後我們去了Leo的家﹐他家甚麼也沒有﹐只有一張床﹐很多空間﹐不過他在我們面前抽煙時我就有點受不了﹐唯有盡量離他可以有多遠便隔
多遠﹐躲在牆角聽他們聊天﹐心裡不停地祈求盡快離開﹐Alex好像對鄰家女孩很有興趣﹐不停在問Leo﹐最後終於有人開口問接著去那裡﹐
不知是誰提議去bowling﹐好﹗原來去AMF﹐不是我從前常去的那間﹐AMF事實上又真的好像比較高級﹐也比其他人貴很多﹐結果無人願意拿八塊
出來玩﹐他們便去隔壁房間打撞球﹐又是一些削弱自信心的遊戲﹐it's just not my game. better not 在這麼多人面前獻醜。
那間房正在播Austin Power﹐大家都好像很喜歡看﹐打完撞球後都不願離開﹐我就覺得有點兒白痴
晚上十二時﹐大家終於願意離開﹐上車不久後Helen已經睡著﹐Alex在不停講「唔鹹唔淡」的國語﹐我想在他旁邊的安迪有點兒受不了﹐
整塊臉都是他的口水﹐我也被他弄得哭笑不得﹐很記得他讀了半個小時仍讀不到個「歡」字﹐真的氣死人﹗很無奈﹗
一點終於回到奧斯丁﹐原本以為會跟育臻去打保齡﹐後來卻留在她家玩撲克牌﹐並認識了她的朋友Cindy跟Julie﹐Cindy一進來就叫安迪做「怪胎」
安迪一臉無奈﹐後來Cindy轉移目標﹐開始針對Alex﹐我覺得Alex很可憐﹐但也忍不住笑﹐I know i am so mean. 我們玩一個不知名遊戲﹐
育臻說這個遊戲沒有規則﹐只要跟著出牌就可以了﹐很不幸地Alex坐在毓琳旁邊﹐要第一個出牌﹐很無奈地被擺了上臺﹐我覺得他很難受﹐
但我自己也不比他明白很多﹐也幫不了他多少。後來轉玩殺手﹐原來他們的玩法跟我平時玩的有點不一樣﹐大家閉上眼睛﹐然後殺手向主持人
指出他所殺的人﹐然後大家再張開眼﹐每殺一個人後大家一起估﹐投票
誰是兇手﹐我第一個抽中做殺手﹐靜靜地坐在一旁的我﹐令人無法相信我是殺手﹐到最後安迪跟Julie還走來自殺﹐我心裡暗笑了很久。
後來改用眼睛來殺人﹐發現很多人都不懂得單眼﹐不懂得玩這個我最喜歡的遊戲﹐可惜最後無人想玩握手殺人﹐應該會更好玩呢。
有人提議看電影﹐我們看「幽靈人間」﹐舒琪的聲音令我有作嘔的感覺﹐裝可愛的高調﹐打冷震﹗陳奕迅的演出亦比想象中失望﹐整部電影
都不可怕﹐還令幾個人睡著﹐我這個很怕看鬼片的人都不覺得害怕﹐你說多麼令人失望﹗
看完電影已經五點多﹐我們決定留在育臻家睡覺﹐終於可以名正言順的睡在地上﹐我始終認為﹐地是最舒服的床﹐夠硬﹐不會弄傷脊骨﹐
我睡得很滿足﹐相信無人會明白我那時的心情。
Nov. 22 (Fri)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY IGGY!!!!
帶銀
把網頁主色改為靚靚淺藍色﹐好高興(好像不太關我事架啵)
昨晚又再次四時多才睡﹐但完成了CS program真的很值得高興
早上七時三十分﹕隔壁在播Lover's Concerto﹐幸好不是在播那幾首很重base的﹐否則我相信Ellen會衝過去撞門打他
放學後看到salvation army在co-op門外放了聖誕籌款搖籃﹐放了一塊錢進去﹐好像太少﹐但我身上只有一張dollar bill﹐我又捨不得放五塊進去﹐
又要裝慷慨捐錢卻又捨不得﹐只好搖頭嘆息﹐唉﹗孤寒鬼
乜我似D會騎牛搵馬﹐貪新忘舊既人咩﹖點解不只一個人問我是否找到新男朋友﹖我不是一個沒有男朋友就會死的人。而且﹐我還是覺得單身好
i went to meet the TA in the afternoon and this time i got a c+/c in the assignment. he just said there are a few little errors
but he didn't show me what it is. but he suggested me to try applying for Tuning Scholar. it's an honor program for CS.
he said i have the potential to do it. but he also told me not to take his word seriously cos he is only a TA. well, then what
do u expect me to do? listen to u or not? and then i went home and check the website. seems like this program is for incoming
freshmen only and i am going to be a junior by spring. >_< well, it's quite excited to hear him saying that to me. that's a
pretty good motivation. 有時候心中存有一點希望﹐一點自信也是好的
i still went swimming at 6pm even though i hestitated for the whole afternoon. to me, it's still kinda cool outside.
but i haven't been swimming for a long time. i think i picked the wrong lane to swim. the people were faster than i thought.
i felt like i was always in their way. 15 mins before the pool closed they left and there were 2 guys swimming with me.
one of them started talking to me when i was standing at the end. and we chatted for more than 2 mins. his name is William.
and he is a fat middle-age man. i was all cooled down chatting with him and he didn't stop until the pool closed and i had to
get out of the water with my body totally cooled down. i felt sooooo cold.
i couldn't believe yuchen booked the racquet ball court at 7 after we swam. but they don't have ball. they have only the rackets
so we couldn't really play. we walked home and took a shower and then went to TanTan to have vietnamnese food.
i was getting super tired and my head started to hurt. oh gosh! don't tell me i got sick becos of swimming. i knew it, i knew
this would happened. i knew it right when i got out of the water. i was super cold cos i had been standing in the pool for more than
2 mins without moving.
we went to yuchen's place to watch a movie. i was getting not right. nose kept running, head kept hurting, and so was my throat.
oh... don't tell me i can't go to San Antonio tmr. i want to go. i have been searching on the web for 2 weeks
for places to go and now u are telling me that i can't go? oh please, my body, please behave!
they didn't seem to want to go home but i couldn't stand it anymore. i still haven't done my laundry and my head was hurting like
crazy...頭快要爆﹐亦包了不少雲吞﹐還不回家睡的話我明天真的會起不了床﹗
回到家被安迪灌了滿滿三杯暖水進肚子﹐覺得溫暖好多﹐喉嚨也沒那麼痛了﹐謝謝你﹐安迪
把衣服丟進乾衣機後就甚麼也不管一頭栽進枕頭裡去
From 帶銀﹕
買禮物的時候，費剎思量地想：對方到底會喜歡什麼呢？在挑選的時候，那個他的身影漸漸在心中擴大…你會想起他的一切，他的喜好，你與他的聊過的話題，希望在當中可以想出個端倪。當滿腦子都是那個人的時候，在街上看到些什麼，都會想：他會不會喜歡呢？走偏了大街小巷，走過每一間店舖，還是找不到合適的東西。然後你會發現，其實自己也不是太瞭解他嘛…
每次買禮物都會想破頭，為的都是希望收到的人會喜歡。渴望在對方拆開禮物的時候，會看到他露出真心喜悅的笑容。有時候就是因為太在意對方的反應，甚而有些禮物，買了，卻最終都沒有送出。有時候是怕禮物不合對方心意，有時候是怕禮物不夠體面，有時候是怕對方會覺得太隆重其事…有些禮物，最後仍然留在我的抽屜中。每次打開抽屜看到，都會想起那個人…什麼時候，才會把禮物送出呢？還有機會送出嗎？
如果收到我的禮物，請給我一個真心喜歡道謝的笑容吧！就算是裝出來的也好（但最好別給我看出是扮的）。
Nov. 21 (Thu)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GAGA!!!
又再次天亮才睡覺﹐這禮拜的生活好像日夜完全顛倒﹐幸好今天沒有早課﹐還是能夠維持足夠睡眠。
今天一早醒來時這句話很自然地突然在我腦海出現﹕世界上最無奈的﹐是愛上你好朋友的男朋友。 ~ 很記得是李珊珊在「刑事征輯檔案」中
寫的小說的第一句﹐今早不知為何會突然poped up in my mind.
今天上課沒有打瞌睡﹐但腦子常常不知飛到那裡去﹐根本就沒有留心聽書﹐浪費了十年難得的清醒。
這句話亦不解地在我腦海中不斷浮現﹕世界上最遙遠的距離﹐是我站在你面前﹐而你卻不知道我愛你 (好像有點不對﹐懂得這句話的朋友請
confirm with me)
下午去了Eckerd買東西﹐我買了很多buy one get one free的東西﹐自己亦覺得很奇怪﹐在convenience store內買了滿滿的兩袋﹐試想象在香港
看見我在7-11內捧著洗潔精﹐紙巾走出來﹐不是怪怪的嗎﹖
在Eckerd看見一個史路比公仔﹐很想買下來﹐但最後還是打消了這個念頭﹐把它放在我的
Christmas Wish List內
awww!!! I don't know how to do my CS program!!!! Every thursday night is the most painful night,
but also the happiest night if i finally got to get it to run!
This week's ER is good. It's exciting. I feel so sorry for that father. His whole family was attacked by a drunk guy and he
had to make a serious decision in giving up a son in order to save another one. At the end, all he has left is a son.
Also, today Nathan is announced failed but at the end he was given the honor to electric-shock the transplanted heart of that
saved son. It is so sweet to see Carter going all the way to Nebraska to give Abby some support when she felt being leftout.
發現昨晚因打排球雙手佈滿瘀痕﹐打字時痛﹐ANDY!!!!
半夜一點﹐隔壁又在播放音樂
Do you believe that you must get a job/ career achievements in order to be sure of your self-worth?
Live everyday as if it's the last day. Don't do something that you will regret. Be prepare to die at any moment.
Games
Nov. 20 (Wed)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELLEN!!!
這是一個夢﹕
若你這刻不幸離開﹐你會帶著遺憾離開嗎﹖若我這刻不幸離開﹐你會為我淌淚嗎﹖
Got a nasty coke from Chick-fil-A. It tastes funny. I finally remember what sauces I wanted to ask for last time. It was
barbecue sauce. All I remember last time was that it was red. I looked around the counter and didn't see any. Today the girl
after me asked for it and reminded me that it is BARBECUE sauce. haha...
隔壁鄰居每天下午都在播放同一系列的疲勞轟炸的音樂﹐再一次發現無論我身處那個城市身邊都有很多奇奇怪怪的人發出不同類型的干擾。
這令我想起上學期在SA的roommate Jennifer﹐假若你未聽過她的故事﹐我還是很樂意和你分享
剛起床﹐發現身處一間很大的睡房睡在很寬的床上﹐面對著很大的玻璃窗﹐出面是Auntie Mandy在放東西進一輛車內﹐我旁邊睡著我的cousins。
電話忽然響起﹐電話中的是Auntie Mandy﹐
她在罵我﹕「你點樣babysit架﹖你知唔知我個仔走左番屋企﹖(我說知道﹐其實都是剛剛發現的)0甘樣比我個仔走左去都有架﹐你點做babysitter架﹐
我以後唔要你啦﹗」接著就掛線了。我心想﹐你兒子不聽話自己早起床沒事做不說一聲便自己走回家﹐是你管教無方﹐我也不想再babysit他呢
突然記得今天是Jacky生日﹐但他亦走了過對面馬路的「家」﹐我便叫醒所有人﹐拿出一早預備好的蛋糕﹐還有一支長長的蠟燭﹐叫大家各就各位﹐
然後我準備走過去叫他過來。我從來未見過這間屋﹐但就好像是自己家一樣﹐途中經過一間房看到我的一個表妹及我媽媽﹐她在講電話﹐表妹在等她﹐
我叫她們快點過去準備一下﹐媽還不肯掛線﹐我離開這間屋準備走過對面﹐在門口還未關門時聽見裡面傳來一片嘆息聲﹐噢﹐原來Jacky自己走來了﹐
在忘記關窗帘的大玻璃窗外看到了裡面的一切﹐唉﹗surprise又不成功﹐我拖他進屋(他好像走得很慢﹐我往他腳下一看﹐原來滿地都是雪呢﹗)
結果我倆幾經辛苦才能走回屋內﹐裡面的人見surprise不到Jacky﹐好像已經沒有興致繼續慶祝﹐連蠟燭都沒有點著﹐我叫Jacky自己點著它﹐
然後許個願再吹熄它。我便離開那大房間﹐從走廊一直走﹐發現這間屋很大很大﹐有兩層樓﹐找到廁所﹐但有人在裡面﹐突然後面變成一間很大的房間﹐
裡面有很多hydepark團契的人﹐好像去camp﹐在拍照﹐我原來變成了阻礙他們拍照的佈景板﹐但我要排隊等廁所﹐走不開﹐所有人都站著盯著我等我﹐
但卻無人願意與我拍照﹐好像跟我拍照會有很嚴重後果﹐
Tess走過來﹐給我感覺是在可憐我在打破僵局免為其難的捱義氣犧牲自己跟我拍照﹐因為當中她跟我認識得最久﹐好像是她的責任﹐
西哥亦走出來嚷著要跟我拍照﹐有人叫他走過來他便澄清是拿著相機幫我拍照不是跟我拍﹐跟著所有人都爭相說要幫我拍﹐好像認投了這職務後
便理所當然的不用走過來跟我拍照﹐究竟我有甚麼問題﹖為何無人願意和我拍照﹖我真的那麼不受歡迎嗎﹖無可奈何我亦醒水找藉口離開﹐
走到下層廁所又有人﹗這次對面是一間房﹐是一間男生房﹐裡面有八張床(不知從那裡來的印象﹐樓上女生房間只有四張床)
我走進去跟幾個人談了一會後﹐他們好像很想睡覺....
然後我便從熟睡中被housekeeping lady吵醒
這個臨時清潔女工真的清潔得很馬虎﹐廁所的頭髮沒有掃掉﹐吸塵沒有吸書桌底下﹐希望原本的那個女工下星期會來吧
晚上終於完成了份Physics Lab Report。遲了兩天交﹐不知會扣多少分呢?
接近半夜時被人拉去打球﹐再一次把自專心壓至最低﹐天生對圓形物體產生排斥的我﹐還是少去球場為妙。
比我想象中快完成M340L功課﹐開始了CS功課﹐但好像不太樂觀
A pie for you
Looking for you
Nov. 19 (Tue)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY DEAR TWIN SISTERS!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY AH HANG!!!!
the discussion in the morning ended early. i got 3 more points on the exam. i ended up didn't go meet with pastor this
afternoon. that spared me another hour of sleep in the afternoon. that really recharged my battery for the rest of the day.
給愛貓的朋友﹕
我離開的時候﹐你會為我淌淚嗎﹖
early in the morning is the peak time for meteor showers. i was so excited that i started standing outside at the balcony
at 3am. and i was the first one among my friends to see some shooting stars. i saw 2 at first before telling anyone to come out.
and then the sky started getting cloudy after they all went out. later on we decided to go across the street to Dobie to
try our luck. we went up to the swimming pool (supposed to be for residents only) and laid on those sun-bathing chair.
we saw lots of shooting stars going across the sky. 這次是我第一次看流星﹐還要是流星雨﹐我真的好興奮好興奮﹐很美很亮的流星﹐
很快地從天的一邊劃過令一邊﹐雖然只看到半個天空﹐看著流星劃破長空﹐看著漆黑一片﹐無窮無盡的天空﹐
我深深感受到宇宙的浩瀚﹐隕石進入地球的大氣層﹐因磨擦而燃燒﹐變成碎片散落於天空﹐
形成我們所看到的流星雨。假若這隕石大得連大氣層都不夠厚來燒燬它﹐我們便會被它的殘骸打中﹐不敢想象後果會怎樣。
很掃興地被管理員叔叔驅趕﹐但我們已看了大半個小時﹐我已經很滿足了
while we were checking the building for good viewing site, ellen suddenly mentioned that it would be so nice to have guys
watching the stars with us. it would be so romantic. me: haha...(cold laugh), and then her friend jerry showed up in less than 15
mins and stayed here the whole night.
it's now 6am. a long distance phone call led to only a little more than 2 hours of sleep, and today is going to be a
long day to me. why is everything going on today? why was there meteor showers today? why is my sisters' birthday today?
why is the lab last week so messed up? why is pastor in-town this week? why did i pick tonight to go to the home meeting?
i probably will have to be out from 9am to 10pm today. u will see me half dead this evening.
i went to a home meeting. it didn't give me a warm feeling that i kinda expected. where can i find that feeling? where can i
find that atmosphere?
i didn't come home till 10:30pm. i forgot to bring a jacket tonight. it was so cold waiting outside for my ride.
i hope i won't get sick.
confirmed that we are not going to NY for x'mas. haha... i am glad i never take melinda's words seriously. or else i would be
really disappointed.
Cutest Cat II
Love is...
Nov. 18 (Mon)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VING!!!
being strong for no reason is actually weak. being able to accept oneself's weakness is stronger.
its strong to understand one's weakness, and admit it. admitting doesn't mean giving up on it.
it just means that its there, and one understands it, and learn from it.
「誰人讓你愉快, 便算合襯.
今天早上我竟然skip class﹐還skip了三堂課﹗﹗﹗我真的沒救了
o my god. someone told me the cs stuffs that we learned today is hard. and i skipped it. sigh!!! i dunno what i can do. i chose
the wrong day to skip.
today, i wish i were a guy.
my back hurts. my stomach hurts. all i want to do today is to lay on my bed, with a warm comforter on top of me, and no
phone calls, no alarm clock, no people talking around me.
the starbucks in barnes and noble doesn't have caramel applecider that i want to order. they don't even take starbucks card that i bought
on saturday. i was forced to use my cash =( i ended up ordered their holiday special: peppermint mocha frapp. and all i can
conclude is, I don't like mint, but this peppermint gives me a strong x'mas feeling.
it's always good to write a letter to santa when u have a strong holiday feeling. that's why i wrote one:
A Letter to Santa Claus
我原來是一位弱者
今天想起﹐暑假時有人跟我講過﹕不值得為一棵樹而放棄整個森林。此刻完全同意
不快樂,不如分開,各自找尋另一角度的快樂和安慰.
走著回頭時,也會替你舊愛侶的豁逹而放下心頭大石.
無心裝裁的愛情是焗束的, 沒有花開的結果是可預料的.
別把這些事情掛上心頭 . . 」
cliff﹐謝謝你
Have A Nice Day!
For Stevie
Nov. 17 (Sun)
跟友人談了一整個晚上後﹐今天到一點多才起床﹐幸好這週末沒有很多功課﹐下禮拜沒有考試﹐要不就完了
finished half of the chem hw. what i did basically was browsing the web the whole afternoon. sigh!!! i think u will hear me
sighing more when it gets closer toward the end of the week. i am a super procrastinator.
不喜歡被人教訓﹐你以為你是誰﹖我倆生活在兩個不同的世界裡﹐你不會明白我的生活﹐那就沒資格告訴我我該怎樣做
男人说：「女人总是愈来愈麻烦的。」不，愈来愈麻烦的是爱情，所有不进则退的东西都让人筋疲力竭，诚惶诚恐。~張小嫻
我們分手了﹐這短短一年零兩個月的日子﹐好像痛苦多於快樂﹐若你問我分手原因﹐我只能夠說﹕性格不合
無錯﹐我一直都強調﹕一生中只有一次戀愛是幸福的。可是﹐幸福並不是必然的﹐我已經不再希罕這種幸福了
why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing detergent is made with real lemons?
愛與被愛
還是要說謝謝
A Blue Ribbon <-- I was touched by this one.
Dare to believe
Nov. 16 (Sat)
woke up at 8, with a serious headache, and then at 10 again to wash my face. and then went back to sleep and didn't wake up till 1.
my head was better. i helped ada to clean everything up. ada gave us milk tea. it's from really good tea bags.
thanks a lot, ada. they are really good =)
we went to albert's place to watch the football game. i know i shouldn't drink coffee with an empty stomach, but it's a waste
not to get coffee when u go to starbuck. so i still got a mocha frap. and i tried a sip of their's caramal applecider. it's good.
and they also introduced the starbuck cards to me. i am going to start this new collection. the x'mas ones are so pretty.
albert has a nice apartment.
football game, UT vs Texas Tech. and UT lost. texas tech really played better than UT today. i was kinda disappointed by the performance of
UT players. i thought they were good. but texas tech is so cooperate and fast. CW is so down after the game. he is really a
huge UT fans. he was even wearing UT sweatshirt today.
we went to eat at brick oven tonight. it's an italian restaurant. it was suppose to be good if my stomach wasn't sick in
the middle of the dinner. i still had to pay full share even though i ate only a slice of pizza and a little bit of the apetizer.
i drank more and more each time. i hope by the time i am 21 i will be a better, more mature, intermediate drinker.
got a card today from someone who is suppose to be special. that card is suppose to touch me. but i only felt funny and
unbelievably sick of the writings in it.
finish reading 卖海豚的女孩 ~ 張小嫻﹐it's good.
from cc: 幹嗎我們不能像魚一樣，用一種表情面對所有人?
family is always there for each other uncondionally. for all the things our family mambers do to us,
without any explaination, we might not even understand the reasons behind but we know that they always have the best
intentions for us. what they do are for the best of us.
there is like an invisible hand connecting the family. they will pull u up when u are falling, and support u when u need it.
it might not be seen from the outside, but the one connected can feel it.
they know that it exists and they are more brave to climb up each mountain in life.
it's always good to have some deep conversations with friends once in awhile. thanks for being my friend =)
Nov. 15 (Fri)
so hard to wake up in the morning. i am surprised that i didn't fall asleep in class.
聪明的女孩子最痛苦的事情是意识到自己蠢。当你爱上一个男人，你会突然变得很蠢。
「不是我不想，女孩子都看不上我。」
---節錄自 卖海豚的女孩 ~ 張小嫻
children are very sensitive to adults' behavior. when something happened, no matter how hard u want to pretend that nothing
has happened, they still know. they are very observant, and u are not a very good actor. so the harder u try, the more u show,
and the more they sense. this will only create frustration to the children. they don't know what exactly is going on, but they
know there is something wrong, something that they shouldn't know. the awkward atmosphere sometimes gives nightmare to them.
they want to know what's going on. they ask, but they never get answered.
the less we know, the happier we would be. being nosy is never a good thing. i think i better stay out of all the problems.
but i still sense that i caused lots of trouble even though everyone told me i didn't. i don't want anyone to think that
i am annoying. maybe i am just too paranoid. but it's just too hard to be a child who isn't allowed to know anything, expecially
when she feels it has something to do with her. now i know how alex felt when i didn't want to tell him everything.
went to church. they had an international thanksgiving dinner. and then we have a small group activities. each group has to
do a skit about a parable in bible. and i was kidnapped by bollie from kit's group to lok's group. there were 7 girls and only
the group leader, lok, was a guy. 七星伴月﹖
was invited to go to ada's apartment tonight. we stopped by bollie's apartment before we went and i got my snoopy cards. hehe....
they are so so pretty. we played drinking games at ada's place. we first played killer for warm up. and then we played a game
call flip the cup. i dunno why but seems like i was the only one who couldn't do it when everyone was practicing flipping the
cup. CW was so mean that he said he didn't want to be in the same group with me. but ended up i wasn't the one who made the team
lost. i could flip the cup in one or 2 tries. and i drank pretty fast too. the night wasn't very intense. we kept resting
after awhile. and we can choose to drink water when we didn't want to drink alcohol.
later we played with the card. each has to pick a card and guess if it's even or odd. and if he guessed it right he can pick
someone to drink. that's when i drink the most. it wasn't that bad at first. but the last round i was picked to drink half a
cup (i had the most in that round). and then my body started to get worse. my heart beated faster and faster, my head hurted,
my stomach was sick, and i couldn't stand up. i conquered the couch and stayed there for about an hour before i threw up.
that's so embarassing. i was the only one who threw up tonight, although i wasn't the first one lying on the bed/floor/couch.
2 went down before i did. and the rest stopped playing after i went down. they just bake some cookies and chat for another hour
before they left. and i was forced to stay at ada's place cos i knew i would throw up again if i ride in the car. they didn't
leave till 5:30 in the morning. i had a really good "morning" sleep afterward.
「不是看不上你，是你太好了。」
「如果我那么好，就不会形单只影。」
「太好的男人，女人不敢要。」
the problem with yelling at men
Too True, Too Often
Nov. 14 (Thu)
it has been so long since the last time i chat online till 4:30am. i dunno... i just felt relax after the test and didn't
want to go to bed early. glad that i don't have early class today.
退一步海闊天空
read back my diary for the week. the entries are boring. my life is boring. seems like i haven't put much feeling/emotion to
my diaries recently. does that mean i am not that very emotional anymore? i think i haven't really imporved much yet.
i have been having no mood to put anything meaningful in the diary.
情緒化是一種病態﹐一種潛伏於腦內的病﹐一種會不斷復發的病﹐一種很難根治的病
自從麥當勞推出Hot and Spicy Chicken Sandwich, 2 Apple Pie, McValue Fries each for $1 後﹐麥當勞已成了常餐﹐之前的麥當勞獎勵計劃跑到那裡去了﹖
我決定由下學期開始學tata實行「早起獎勵計劃」﹐用甚麼來作獎勵呢﹖有人願意參與嗎﹖愈多人參與﹐成功機會愈大
希望每一個不快樂﹐傷心﹐難過﹐苦惱﹐困惑的朋友都能快快從困苦中走出來
恐懼+怯
Mindreader <--i have been trying think of the logic behind but i
still don't get it
more than one person told me that this mindreader thing doesn't work on them. well, maybe my mind is too easy to read cos it
doesn't have complicated brainwaves in there like everybody else's does. that means my brain is not as smart as others'
which would block the computer from reading them.
人生的十個秘密
戀愛心態三重測
An Apartment <-- not recommended for people who have heart problems
How To Keep An IDIOT Busy
Fast Food Confidential Oh gosh! i have been eating
at mcdonald's everyday. but i just can't stop it. i love mcdonald. maybe one day i would be sick of it after eating it
everyday for a couple of weeks. but by then i would become a 豬小姐了
Nov. 13 (Wed)
linear algebra exam: 做不完的試卷﹐大半都是寫些一定是錯的答案﹐唉﹗
i napped for longer than i planned. it's just hard to wake up from a nap in the afternoon.
went to a pointless meeting with the RA in the afternoon. she wants to make sure me and ellen gets along well. we do so
amy has nothing much to say =)
the past cs exam paper is sooo hard. i don't know how to do it and i don't get the solution on the web.
i hope i won't get similar questions tonight. i really have recuision and big O handicap. sigh!!!
after the cs exam: 考試比想象中容易﹐開心=)
watched final fantasy tonight. the graphics are okay. the characters are not as real as i thought it would be. and the story
line is kinda boring. i had the urge to stop the movie at the beginning. it doesn't give me a strong eager to watch the
whole thing and find out what the ending is.
from nip(so true!): feelings are realli unreliable. it comes & goes quickly, without ur notice.
好朋友
愛要互動才長久
教我如何不想他
Nov. 12 (Tue)
夢見自己去了變成了澳門人的Aaron的apartment﹐他跟我講廣東話﹐他家很大﹐間隔好像香港我姑姐的家﹐我們講了很多﹐但現已記不起內容
有時候不是笨
帶銀﹕不管有多少人像我，不管是那一面的我，我就是我，世界上只有一個最特別的我。
If Teddy Bears Ruled The World<--cc would love this
Got this from an email. another good sharing:
A philosophy professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When the class
began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with
rocks, rocks about 2" in diameter.
假若做一件自己喜歡的事會使至少兩個人不高興的話﹐最好不要做了
i hate tuesday. long long day.
9am: cs discussion session. we talked about something that could be in the test and there is no
way i can write those codes in the exam. it is way too hard for us.
12:30pm: chem class. slept through half the class. sigh!!! i better get back in shape. i can't ruin my next test again!
4pm: physics lab. this lab is suppose to be a short one but we were the last group to leave. i actually knew what was going on
in the whole lab and did help out a lot this time. better than my partner chad, who kept talking to our TA about philosophy.
a guy from another group who chad doesn't like came to us and told us to turn our machine off because "we were
only making measurement." we were actually doing something that needed the machine on. who do u think u are?
don't tell us not to do anything unless u know what we are doing. we all stared at his back after he left our table.
2 tests tmr. i have no idea what i was learning in class. i have no idea how to do the past exam papers. miricles don't
always happen but i still wish for one tmr.
同一天內我的aim buddy list有三個人被warned﹐what a coincident.
望著好像外星語言的試卷﹐望著佈滿數字的課本﹐我只覺無奈﹐明天的考試﹐還是不要抱太多的期望
發脾氣﹕撕破了不知多少張白紙﹐鉛筆都不知被我擲到那裡去了﹐但發脾氣好像解決不了問題﹐還是早點去睡吧
很高興夜深讀書時友人在網上陪著我﹐有人給予支持和鼓勵﹐感覺不再那麼孤單
而是一時沒開竅
有時不是努力就能成功
而是細心努力再加一點機會
夢也許遙不可極
但總一天它們都會實現
~ ~ ~I believe~ ~ ~
Silent Movie
cool bouncing ball game
He then asked the students if the jar was full? They agreed that it was. So the professor then picked up
a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course,
rolled into the open areas between the rocks.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous -- yes.
The professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and proceeded to pour their entire
contents into the jar -- effectively filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.
"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents
your life. The rocks are the important things - your family, your partner, your health, your
children--things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be
full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your
car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff."
"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued "there is no room for the pebbles or the
rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will
never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical
to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out
dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, ! give a dinner party and fix the disposal.
"Take care of the rocks first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented.
The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life
may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers."
my dear friends, when can u spare some time with me for a drink?
Nov. 11 (Mon)
這是一個夢﹐一個很混亂的夢
死啦﹐糟糕了﹐不夠時間讀書了﹐怎麼辦﹖好驚好驚﹐真的很擔心
人物﹕
我﹐Andy, Alex, Jack, Sally, 3 "hot cuties", Gigi, 講員﹐Mike
一開始去一間早餐店買外賣﹐然後浩浩蕩蕩地去某人家吃早餐﹐然後背景變成了一間教會﹐有講員來講道﹐應該是位客人的講員竟然變成擁有教會鎖
匙負責鎖門的人﹐他叫我去關燈我卻找不到燈掣﹐結果Gigi來幫我關燈
然後又再一次浩浩蕩蕩地去同一間早餐店買外賣﹐我叫他們負責買我甚麼都吃﹐然後無無聊聊地在餐廳走來走去﹐其他人選好後結果由其中一位
"hot cuties"負責買﹐我就找了一張臺來坐﹐然後所有人原本站著的都走過來坐﹐we formed a circle with 2 square tables﹐Andy問﹕我們
在這裡吃嗎﹖how come we moved the tables and formed such a neat circle﹐另一個"hot cutie"就走去問正在order的"hot cutie", 她的一句
不是就使我們整台人同時間站起來準備離開﹐情景很好笑。我還不知道會去那裡吃﹐剛踏出門口沒多久便有位男人從後把我拉走﹐他在飛呢﹗
看清楚點﹐原來是我的academic advisor Mike﹐他問我Is Alex okay?我很愕然地回頭望﹐Alex事實上有真的好像很不快﹐心事重重似的。
I said I don't know, but I can ask and try to find out. (The other people don't seem to realize that I was gone/kidnapped.)
然後Mike放下我要我自己走回去﹐所有人都好像若無其事。還未到目的地我便醒了
my lab partner and his girlfriend insisted on walking me back to my dorm. thanks chad, but i really would like to walk on my
own tonight. i really didn't appreciate what u offered to me. i am sorry.
there was a strong smell of mango on my floor when i got home from the lab tonight. i want to eat mango!!!
i want to eat filet, lemon pepper filet. i want to eat crabs: 薑蔥炒蟹. i want to eat shrump: hard boil shrump.
i want to eat seafood: lots of seafood. i want to go back home: home sweet home. i want to eat mom's dishes: delicious dishes.
basically, all i want is to get away from my exams.
conclusion for today: CS is hard.
Ellen: all guys look at porn sites. really? they do?
突然不想回Houston﹐想永遠留在Austin
戀愛這東西真的很奇妙
緣份這東西更是神奇
只可慨嘆一句﹕可惜﹐可惜﹗
Nov. 10 (Sun)
朋友開心﹐我亦開心﹐朋友不樂﹐我亦不會好過。
通宵達旦了兩晚後﹐今天要好好讀書寫功課﹐原本以為這週末可以讓我睡個痛快﹐但結果好像睡得比平時還要少﹐唉﹗我這星期沒救了
didn't do much today. sigh! just used a couple of hours to finish my hw. didn't study for my tests. didn't start working
on the review assignment. and i spent my whole day hanging around austin for nothing.
lunch at 3 at pho. so full. i had a coffee with not enough milk that it turned out to be so bitter. i also ordered a
spring roll. after i ordered they offered to treat me that meal. feel so bad about that. cos i ordered so much this time.
didn't go home till i think 5. and then not long after i start my hw, sing called me to dinner and i spent 2 hours with him.
pho at night again. felt sick when i saw other ppl's dishes. have u ever drank a sour green tea? i did tonight.
and the tapioca was still warm! so disappointed by pearl drink at pho. never order green tea with pearl there!
當你發現自己每晚睡前都想著同一個人時﹐你便已經不知不覺地愛上了她
All Problems Begin With Men
Pet's letter to God
True Friend
Firework above HK Victoria Harbour
Firework above Lady liberty
木乃伊出土後能懷孕？that's gross!
Always here friend
The Truth About MOTHERS!
Nov. 9 (Sat)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANDY!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY CC!!!
it's one of the funest saturday i have in austin. i like surprises. it's happy to plan, trying to hide the secret
from the main character, and to see a person got surprised at the end. it's happy to celebrate my friends' birthday.
it's happy to meet new people. it's happy to hang out with different people. it's happy to hang out with someone u seldom
get to see. overall, i am happy today.
hehe...yeah!!! broke my record of bowling. i got 149 today. haha...unbelieveable.
無論是第幾次看﹐午夜凶鈴還是這麼恐怖﹐但我覺得坐我旁邊的旁邊的女生的叫聲更恐怖﹐
看見她害怕的樣子我就忍不住笑出來﹐整晚都很緊張﹐很熱很熱﹐越緊張越熱﹐但九個人一起看鬼片氣氛真的很不同﹐很好笑。
很高興很高興﹐有人讚我國語講得不錯﹐嘻嘻
今日大出血﹐但只要大家開心﹐花多少錢也沒所謂﹐媽講得對﹐我真的是對外很慷慨﹐但我真的覺得很滿足﹐就好像是完成了本份一樣
man! 還是要轉用有banner的geocities. well, at least now i am not writing for nothing. my 忠實讀者終於可以繼續看我的日記了
還是單純一點比較好
Nov. 8 (FRIDAY FINALLY!!!)
氣憤﹗可以upload我的page但卻not accessable =(
woke up by a phone call from carol's aunt. she called at the right moment, 30mins b4 my class.
i think i didn't take a good message cos my mind was very fogged but i got the main idea of what she was trying to tell carol.
when i first heard the phone ringing i thought it was someone who morning calls me but i am sure they wouldn't call my cell
phone. and the caller id is unavailable. i then thought it would be my parents. but when i pick it up the voice is so unfamiliar
that i didn't know how to response. she has a strong accent but she was speaking in cantonese so i didn't know if i should
respond to her in english or chinese.
slept for only 2 hours really killed me. i was suffering in class. horribly struggling to wake up in the first 2 classes.
and in the third CS class we were doing a test for extra credit. i couldn't think well in the test. my brain was like a hard
wooden block. but i think i got the answers right. i hope so.
o my god. my arm still hurts from the flu shot. what kind of shot is that? that pharmacy student must have poked the needle
into a bad spot of my arm. well, she is only a pharmacy student. what do u expect?
i hate going to the interactive grading session every friday. i went there for 2 mins to get my grade and then i could leave.
sigh!!! what a waste of time! i asked david and he said he doesn't want to be sitting there every friday neither.
well, at least i m happy when he said he was trying to ask for a +(25/20) on my assignment last week. but there was a
tiny error that kicked me out of it. well, it's ok. c+/c+(20/20) is good enough. i thought i would get a c-/c-(13/20) on
this one in the first place. i am happy about the result.
it was hot enough in the afternoon to get myself a smoothie. but it's not as good as i thought.
church tonight is cool. we had singspiration and the songs are all good ones. the meal at IHOP afterward is cool too.
first time that i finished everything i ordered. i finished all the pancakes. haha...i really ate a lot today. hehe...
If one day...
What's not to say to cops
I wish you could see
I wished on a dream
星座總論
Nov. 7 (Thu)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEX!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY EDMUND!!!
McDonald's breakfast is always the best breakfast. Thanks andy and alex =)
喉嚨依然好痛好痛﹐救命呀﹗
死啦死啦﹐愈來愈覺得不夠時間完成功課﹐但又沒有心情做﹐每天都只想躺在床上﹐開學時的衝勁那裡去了﹖
went to get the flu shot after class this afternoon. my arm hurts the whole day afterward. even hurter than donating blood.
probably becos there are more muscles on my arm than the joint. and whenever i move my arm i move that muscle.
haha...wasted the whole day doing nothing other than my 340L hw...and didn't really work on my program till 10.
talked on the phone for a while, and stayed at double A's room for more than 2 hours...sigh!! i am hopeless.
didn't finish my program till 5am...should i go to bed? i think i will not be able to wake up after 2 hours tho.
humm...maybe i should just stay up for the next 2 hours.
A Vegas Scare
A Man's Brain
Guardians from the sky~The pictures are pretty.
but they look freezing cold to me.
Optical Illusions
不能愛你﹐我們就只能擁抱
送你一個笑臉~張小嫻
見面﹖不見面﹖~張小嫻 ~ 記得很久以前從朋友中收到這篇散文﹐但
暑假因換電腦而刪除了這文章﹐想不到今天無意中又讓我找到這篇很矛盾但蠻有意思的散文
Nov. 6 (Wed) 勁打乞嗤﹐勁流鼻水﹐喉嚨痛 =(
haha...even battery starts having recloseable pack. it is a revolution to the design of battery wrappers.
i still remember how i always have a hard time unwrapping the batteries. now it's so much easier with this little tap at the
bottom.
<好心收手>
累積的midterm 悲觀的咒罵
回頭望 望那卷 恨我未嘗做岩過
midterm好心放開我
很多很多
心理測驗
finally changed the battery of my mouse. it's finally under my control.
being forgiven is supposed to be a good feeling but all i have is just a foggy, contradicting feeling.
alex was right, banner-free web hosting is never good becos they get no sponsors to support them and now my webpage is
always unaccessable. they probably will ask us to pay soon so that they can improve their server. i will find
another hosting asap so that my readers can access to my page whenever they want to.
i thought a shower would wake me up but i ended up sleeping with my hair wet this afternoon. sigh!!! i think i am hopeless.
there are so many things waiting for me to do and i just lay on my bed. i was so lazy that i didn't even put the books on my bed
away and just bend my body next to them.
slack off the whole night. went to do the laundry and ended having no empty dryer for me to dry my clothes. have to wait till
12am to get one empty dryer (i always use 2). now it doubles the time it takes to dry all my clothes. sigh!! i hope i will have
dry clothes to wear to class tmr...i hv nothing else to wear =(
found my sock that i lost last time when i did my laundry. it was sitting on the floor in the basement when i went to check my
laundry tonight. hehe...yeah!!!
讀了也是錯 瞬間灰心喇
誠心祈望有疏屎幫一把
如今已炒晒 這分數 太可怕
讀到驚 讀到慌 我心一再受折磨
讀到死 無力氣 長期缺睡冇心機
就快死 沒轉機
求其靠背搏碌過
低分非我的錯
凌晨照讀也坎坷
累也讀頹也讀
望那功課逃避我
又午夜照衝趕deadline
只祈望俾靚grade我
Keep Smiling ^_^
I am a psychic. <-- this one is kinda stupid.
Without you, my friend, I will be...
Words used by women
給我的朋友們~為何突然收到那麼多意思相若的message﹐我知我做錯了﹐
這可能是一個啟示﹐讓我好好記著這個教訓
Nov. 5 (Tue)
Chem Mid-term at 12:30. good luck =)
Global World Children's Day
I would be really happy if u can help raising money for children around the world by clicking that little heart.
懸浮在空中的吻~張小嫻
Bugging You
ZooKeeper ~ A cute game
Air Hockey
I wish for u today
一秒鐘內﹐真的可以發生很多事﹐或者我真的太頑固﹐
太顧面子﹐只為了放不下的矜持﹐而失去一個朋友﹐值得嗎﹖
收到一個關於小刺刺破輪胎的故事﹐心裡很難過﹐很後悔﹐我知道說話講了不能收回﹐但希望時間能補回這傷口﹐我會記著這根刺﹐這根我以為毫不起眼的小刺﹐
卻刺出一個很大很大的傷口
funked my chem test. i wonder how many points he will curve it.
first time in this semester i overslept and was late to my lab. i woke up 10 mins b4 the lab and arrived the room 20 mins
later.
收到苦榮寄來的postcard﹐couldn't believe u really did it. and it's from both of u =) really thanks a lot. it's now sitting on my desk.
Nov. 4 (Mon)
五分鐘內反遮兩次﹐討厭無定向風﹐點解成條街D人都好似唔洗擔心反遮唔洗留意住風向﹐拒地D遮用咩做架﹖大家都係縮骨遮﹐點解人地果D
好似唔會反甘既﹖﹗聖誕節願望﹕希望收到把保證唔反既靚靚縮骨遮
收到一封長長的衣貓﹐覺得很有意思﹐在此跟大家分享
友情物語
忙的時候，想要休息
建立友誼如像種樹，因為友誼是一株樹 TREE
---- 好朋友守則 ---
還有很多很多﹐未能盡錄
很多謝andy一早起床幫我register for my classes in spring. i like my schedule very much =)
上堂好眼訓超眼訓勁眼訓﹐又唔記得帶ID出街﹐無得去Music school register for my piano class. ya, i am taking piano next semester.
haha...isn't it surprising?
called the school of music later in the afternoon and they told me that the piano classes are all full =( i don't know what else i can take.
alex's bday is coming soon. i hope by that time we will be ok again. i promised to have a dinner with him that night after
his test. i don't know if he still wants to eat with me or not. but i will for sure keep my promise.
開始討厭老鼠在桌上不受控制地飛來飛去﹐風馳電掣﹐無法無天﹐是時候換電了
窮的時候，渴望富有
生活安逸了，怕幸福不能長久
該決定的時候，擔心結果不如預期
看明白了，後悔當初沒有下定決心
不屬於自己的，常常心存慾望
握在手裡了，又懷念未擁有前的輕鬆
生命若不是現在，那是何時？
一個人可以毫無道理跟你做一輩子親戚
但一個人不會毫無道理跟你做一輩子朋友
我會想起....與你認識的種種...
也會想起....發生過的點點滴滴...
直到我們都年老時...是否會像現在這樣...坐在電腦前互訴心聲?..
不管如何....希望我們永遠是真誠相對的朋友(知己)...
朋友就是喜歡你也了解你的人
願你都能珍惜身邊每一個朋友
因為你我有緣份，才能成為朋友
可以成為知己的，更難得！
時間未必是你我....成為知己的原因
但一定可以証明
朋友不是白費！
希望您永遠都是我的好朋友！
今日..我同你天各一方
你有你生活，我有我忙碌
或許以後也不能再見，但我寄望你不會把我忘記
即使世界這麼大，人那麼渺少
我的心亦不時存有碰見你的機會........
我只盼日後再相逢，或停留於那個只是屬於我們的時空~
這究竟是誰對誰錯
很多話....我沒法說出口，是我一生的遺憾
朋友，是你高興時想分享的
朋友，是你不高興時可以給你發脾氣的
朋友，也是在你沒錢開飯時搭救你的
朋友，你悶得發慌時可以跟你一同發慌的
朋友，也是你看見他上線時，想給他"^_^！！
T : Trust (信任)
R : Respect (尊重)
E : Exchange (交流)
E : Emotional Support (精神支持)
朋友就是無形中伴你走過風雨，永遠支持你的力量
朋友就是一種無法言喻的美好感覺
朋友就是在別人面前永遠護著你的那個人
朋友就是即使是一點小感動，一點小事情都想一起分享
朋友就是當你抱頭痛哭的時候，扶著你肩膀的那個人
朋友就是當你面對人生挫折時，一直緊握你的那雙手
Nov. 3 (Sun)
my mind has been like floating in the air the whole day. partly becos of the pill that i took last night before i slept.
it's super drowsy and i didn't get enough sleep last night. i slept thru the whole worship in the morning.
p.s. this week i hv been so overwhelmed with thoughts in my mind. problems in relationship with a friend, with my bf, marcus,
my chem hw and test, matrix and cs hw due the end of the week and i hv no idea what i hv learned, letters that need to be written asap,
... o my god! why is everything happening around these 2 weeks???
i still had running nose this morning and uncle albert thought i was crying. na...i am not really that weak.
my brain is so fogged today. have been having a weird feeling the whole day. couldn't really think. it's like a hard wood block
in my head. i thought my feeling toward marcus has died down already and i would have no emotion today cos i didn't feel like
i would feel anything strange this morning. but i was wrong. at first i could still smile at everyone and laugh at jokes that
someone told us. and even when rosalie, my younger cousin, was crying all i felt was that i should be a big sister and be
strong to comfort her. there was only a really strong protective feeling and a closeness between us that can't be described
by words, no sadness yet. i still felt ok when i was helping to set up the memorial service and saw all his toys and pictures.
but then in the middle of the service, when it was my other cousin, melinda's turn to share the reflexion,
she just walked onto the stage and bursed out crying. she just stood there crying so painfully that my tears started to
come down my cheek. all the memories of the good moments with marcus came up to my mind and i just can't stop the
tears. i told myself, don't cry. i am not here to cry. rosalie is sitting next to me and is waiting for my comfort(i assume).
be strong! when melinda finally finished her speech, rosalie went up to hug her. is it a natural reflex that all big sisters/
brothers have? i wanted to give rosalie comfort and support and she was doing the same thing to melinda. after all we all
went through the time with marcus together. we all have happy memories with him. we are all in a family. this family feeling
is so strong today.
i so wanted to watch the video that they were playing during the refreshment after the service but i had to go catch the bus back to austin.
rosalie walked with me all the way to the car. i feel so close to her all of a sudden! and when i was on the bus it was showing
the movie Independence Day. when i saw the eldest son of the pilot, i was so touched by his behavior! after his father died he has to
be the strong one and take care, protect his younger brother and sister, and he has to keep all the sadness to himself and
be a good role model to them. and then when i looked out the window, it was so dark outside that i can't see nothing.
it's just like my road of the future. it's so dark that i don't know what i will encounter in the future. and i have
no elder brother or sister to guide, to follow. i felt so weak, so insecured. tonight i was so emotionally sick with all
these fixed feelings in my mind. i want to just go home and sleep and sleep and never wake up. i want to stop thinking
about anything that is going on recently. but i know i have to get on with my life, my life without marcus, as i did
in the past year. but he will always be in my heart. Marcus, i love u and i miss u.
因為memorial service 而讓我再次和grace碰面﹐不知為何她給我的印象不太好﹐而今天竟被我發現她成了marcus的乾媽媽﹐
memorial service前她多次重複又重複地告訴我怎樣派紀念品﹐還很不信任地在遠處屢屢的盯著我﹐記得一年前她自作主張為marcus安排生日派對﹐
還未征詢屋主同意便自行決定在一位uncle的家舉行﹐並四處宣佈派對的地點﹐大家收到電話都一頭霧水﹐連屋主都不知道有這一回事。
也記得她曾經負責找人捐血小板給marcus﹐安排得很混亂﹐我永遠都聽不明白她說的英語﹐尤其是電話中的她﹐她也好像聽不明白我的問題﹐
常常問非所答。
heard from chung that today uncle jackson and jacky cried in cell group meeting tonight. hope they are both okay.
Nov. 2 (Sat)
wow!!! i actually woke up earlier than my cousins today. i told myself i would start on my chem hw early today and i ended up
walking around the house doing nothing. i told myself i would be able to finish my hw by midnight but i couldn't and ended up
got a 60 on the hw.
went to Ross to get pants and shoes for Marcus' memorial service tmr. spent 2 hrs in there and got myself a pretty pair of
pants and shoes. i tried to get away from the clothes section or else i would be tempted to try more and more on and get more.
got a box of snoopy hard candies as bday gift =D. thanks melinda. u are such a good cousin.
have been looking forward to the arrival of auntie clara but she didn't call us and didn't stay at our place tonight. hope
tmr come faster so that i can see her asap. didn't know that melinda is giving a speech tmr in marcus' memorial service until
tonight. she has been practicing the whole night. i was forced to hear the same speech over and over again.
have been sneezing the whole day. not a good sign. sigh!!!!
Nov. 1 (Fri)
it's another month already. went back to read my diary in october. so many things happened last month. i learned a lot from
my experiences. and i hope i will utilize what i learned to help create a better me. there is always room for improvement.
Got this in an email. want to share with u:
time passes like water floating down a river. it never stops and wait for u. water in the river is always fresh.
u can never catch back the flow that is passed already. look forward to the upcoming water. don't try to chase the past.
going back to houston today. i really wish i had a car so that i can just go back on sunday for marcus's memorial service.
i am sure i can't study in houston and i seriously need to study for my chem mid-term on tuesday.
昨天才罵完tata不吃早餐﹐今天自己卻空著肚子上學﹐得到的教訓是肚子不停打鼓﹐尷尬得很﹐不久之後便開始胃痛了﹐結果今天的早餐是白開水一杯﹐
胃藥一粒﹐再加CS鄰座同學很好人送我的一粒朱古力﹐很慶幸自己有隨身帶藥的習慣﹐很快便好了。
mike spent almost the whole class talking about Big-O. seems like it is really important. and i have trouble understanding it.
what should i do? i am Big-O "handicap", and recursive "handicap" too (according to peggy).
sometimes it's hard to control some situations. but when it turns out to be what u don't want it to be, u feel so bad, sad,
and 無奈﹐因一件事而影響到自己與某些人的關係﹐有點無辜及可惜。
sheta drove me back to houston. we didn't seem to have much to talk in the car even tho we both are from smcc. and she was the
red house house captain. i didn't recognize her. maybe i was living in my own world in F4.
we seem to be in 2 different world. all i can conclude about her is that she is a typical st marian.
滿口純正得有點做作的英文﹐從她口中出來的英文比中文多很多倍﹐很明顯她跟我是來自兩個不同世界的人﹐家境及背景都很不同﹐
而我對她的駕駛技術有所保留﹐做人﹐還是不用那麼囂張的好
第一次谈恋爱的男人 - 張小嫻
你適合早婚或遲婚
For all my friends:
Thanks for being my friend
A never forget me rose.
I think this is true. I will never forget any of u.
Facts of Life**
1. At least 5 people in this world, love you so much they would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you, in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you, is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you, can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. Without you, someone may not be living.
8. You are special and unique, in your own way.
9. Someone that you don't know even exists, loves you.
10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
11. When you think the world has turned it's back on you, take a look, you most likely turned your back on the world.
12. When you think you have no chance at getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you believe in yourself,
you probably sooner or later will get it.
13. Always remember complements you received, forget about the rude remarks.
14. Always tell someone how you feel, then they'll know.
15. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they're great.