The World Wrestling Federation has transformed it self many times over the years. First, there was Hulk Hogan as champion, and the wrestlers who opposed him were huge monsters. This made every Hogan victory seem like a monumental achievement as his opponents seemed to get larger and larger. Then Bret Hart was installed as champ, and his opponents were the best wrestlers around, which made Bret seem like the greatest wrestler in the world.Now, the WWF is a place where the men are not as important as are the women that they are acquainted with. But lately, I feel that the WWF is taking the necessity to showcase women over wrestling too far. Debra, Jackie, Sable (recently relieved of her duties with the federation), Terri and Chyna were a compliment to the men. But since only Jackie and Chyna qualify as wrestlers, these other women are simply valets. Now the WWF has stooped so low as to giving their number-one valet, Debra, her own valet. What is that? Why does a woman, whose main role is to display her sizable breasts whenever her man is in trouble, need an assistant? The arrival of Miss Kitty (Stacy Carter) appears to me to be a gift to Jerry Lawler for helping the WWF become the number-one wrestling federation in the world once again. But if I had my way, I wouldn't have to endure Lawler's moronic shenanigans a minute longer, but that is another column for another time.
The worst move of all, was the addition of Lillian Garcia. While I do admit that she is a great deal more attractive than Howard Finkel, she barely knows anything about wrestling, and if ever there was anyone who displayed less enthusiasm while doing one of the glamour jobs in show business, I haven't seen them. I don't understand why it was necessary to bring her in, especially since the WWF has a history (there's that word again) of introducing women announcers that have all failed. It won't be long before we see Howard Finkel back doing his old job again, seeing as how he was just "terminated" by Chris Jericho.
Memo to the WWF: Enough with the women. You have plenty now. Every wrestler in your federation, practically, has a valet, groupie, assistant, girlfriend, or female counterpart. Let's begin concentrating on the wrestlers. Just like you don't need movie stars and team sports athletes to sell tickets, you don't need the women either. Stone Cold, The Rock, The Undertaker, and Mankind are quite capable of putting butts in seats.
The Undertaker & Paul Wight are the WWF Tag Team Champs. This year alone we saw X-Pac & Kane, The Rock & Mankind, Rob Van Dam & Sabu, and Tommy Dreamer and Raven all wearing World Tag Team belts. While this may help to sell seats, this is also the death of the division. Imagine if The Undertaker & Paul Wight are unbeatable as singles wrestlers, then how can they be stopped if they join forces. Never mind teamwork or experience, in the real world, these two men, or Sting & Luger, The Rock & Mankind, Van Dam & Sabu would never lose their belts.How could Rob Van Dam keep the ECW TV belt for 18 months, and not be able to defend the tag belts with a partner who is already feared by the entire federation. Superstar tag teams are a waste of talent, especially when the sport is so talent rich in the tag team area anyway. The WWF has at least 6 or 7 viable regular teams currently competing for top contention, but a champion that should only be defeated by another superstar tandem. What chance do the Hardy Boys stand against this supposed juggernaut?
If a federation wants to create a super team, than that team should cease top wrestle as singles, and be a team only. Not only do these superstar teams weaken the tag team ranks by making other teams unwilling to compete; they weaken tag team wrestling. WWF Unforgiven is featuring a 6-man World title match. Of those six men, at lest 2, either The Undertaker & Wight, or The Rock & Mick Foley will be tag team champs. This means that there will be no tag title match on the pay-per-view. Too much of this causes people to lose interest in tag team wrestling, which is what Eric Bischoff wanted all along.
I have read all of the Internet sheets, and they all say about the same thing. Vince McMahon offered Taz a lot of money to leave ECW and come to the WWF. He was promised that he would be able to use the same character that he had in ECW, and would get title shots soon after his arrival. Newsletter editors seem to believe that Vince intends to use Taz to further illustrate that ECW is a lessor federation than the WWF.These editors use as evidence the fact that Scorpio, Terry Funk, The Blue Meanie, Chris Candido, and Shane Douglas entered the WWF, and were far less successful than in their ECW days. They seem to forget that Steve Austin and Mick Foley, were actually more successful than when they were in ECW. Every federation does this, it is nothing new. Vince made stars out of WCW scrubs Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, and Paul Levesque(Triple H), while WCW stars Lex Luger, Ric Flair and the Steiners, struggled in the WWF.
There in no way that The Dudley Boys and Taz will work for Vince without getting title runs. These men are too talented, too controversial, and too entertaining to not make money for the WWF. Let them do what they do, and before long, they will be champions. Using Taz to put D-Lo Brown over would be a mistake, because he will never be over (but that's another column for another time).
Once again, the WWF has made a stupid move with regards to one of their titles. Now, before I get a lot of hate mail from WWF fans, remember that Duane Gill was the final Light Heavyweight Champion before the title was discontinued. What I'm talking about this time is every title below the World Title. The World Wrestling Federation used to represent the very best in wrestling champions. Now, the titles are a revolving door for merchandise distribution.The Intercontinental champion, the number one contender to the World Title, is engaged to the world champion, and this isn't even a homosexual angle. Chyna holds the IC belt, which puts every male wrestler at a disadvantage. If they beat Chyna for the title, then they defeated a woman, and if Chyna defeats them, then they lost to a woman. This can't help the marketing of a performer.
Chyna could have been the female Hulk Hogan, considering that the WWF had Jacqueline, Luna Vachon, and Terri Power in their employ. She could have been pushed into an unbeatable Women's Champion angle, holding the title for years and beating every "credible" woman wrestler on the planet. Instead, we got a pair of models as champ (Sable & Debra), titles won in evening gown matches, and now, The Fabulous Moolah feuding with Mae Young, combined ages over 100, over the title. What a waste.
The European Title, which should have been a television belt, is never defended in Europe. It isn't even defended in the U.S. D-Lo Brown is the current champ, and you wouldn't know it because he doesn't even get any television time. Convert this belt into a television title before it's too late, but since this belt is passed around from man to man without having to defeat anyone (Dennis Knight, Mark Henry), it may be better to eliminate the belt all together.
The Light Heavyweight division had the most promise, with Kaientai, The Hardys, Papi Chulo and others, but somehow, Duane Gill became champ. WHAT IS THAT???? Not only shouldn't Gill be champ, he should never win a match against the caliber of athlete that the WWF featured in its Lt. Heavyweight division. The powers that be felt that the small guys should be in with the Heavyweights, and now we see that not only are many of them injured, there are no effective story lines for 200-pound athletes.
The tag team division shows the most promise, but The Hollys are the champs. I don't know who Bob Holly has nude pictures of, but somehow he is a four or five time (I lost count) champion in the WWF. This guy is a waste of television time, and his mike skills are poor. The Old Brood, The New Brood, The Dudleys, The Acolytes, X-Pac & Kane, The Outlaws, this is the best the WWF tag team division has been since the first Survivor Series, when the WWF featured 10 championship caliber teams.
The WWF needs to seriously take a step back and review itself, because no matter how much money you are making now, if the product starts to suffer (and it is), then the well will dry up very quickly (see WCW when the New World Order dyed out).
World Championship Wrestling has vacated its world title. A tournament has been established to determine a new champion. This can only serve to make the world title interesting again, because it changes hands as much as the tag belts. I only have one question; who is the IDIOT that put together these brackets? Some of the first and second round matches are sure ratings grabbers, but they eliminate some very good wrestlers, while allowing some mid-carders to advance further than they should.Bret Hart eliminated Goldberg, and Saturn eliminated Eddie Guerrero, so now, one of these men will eliminate the other in the second round, and we have already lost Goldberg & Eddie Guerrero from the tournament. Lex Luger eliminated Rick Steiner in the first round, and faces DDP in the second, which means one of two former, multi time champions, will be eliminated in the second round (or both if there is a double DQ). The winner of this match will probably face Sting in the third round, because he simply has to defeat Meng to get there. This winner will face a 'rested' Bret Hart, who after Saturn, faces the Norman Smiley/Billy Kidman winner. Smiley versus Kidman in the second round, shouldn't they have both been eliminated in the first?
In the other bracket, we have such scintillating matches as Vampiro/Berlyn (Alex Wright), Lash LeRoux/Ernest Miller, and Madusa, who already lost once to Meng, facing Evan Karagias. Three of these six athletes will be in the second round while some of the other matches consist of Booker T/Jeff Jarrett, Scott Hall/Sid Vicious, Disco Inferno/Curt Hennig, and Dean Malenko/Chris Benoit. If Russo & Ferrera, the new WCW Head Writers, are looking to push an underdog, then they are going about it the right way. Unless there is going to be a major surprise regarding the eventual champion, expect Bret to win this thing, since his only competition is the Sting vs. the Luger/DDP winner, and then Sid Vicious in the other bracket (see WCW.com). The PPV hosting the finals is being held in Canada anyway, are we really that stupid?
WCW should, at the very least, add a level of intrigue to this thing by having the mid-card wrestlers all eliminated in the first two rounds, leaving the stars for the final three rounds. But this is the same federation that crowns a Cruiserweight champ, and then has all of the capable contenders competing in the tag team division, leaving the champ with only mid-card competition.
An article in one of Atlanta, Georgia's leading newspapers vilified the World Wrestling Federation for what it perceives as the glorification of violence against females, as well as decapitation. Apparently, The WWF's recent release of the Al Snow action figure, with the accompanying 'Head' character, has raised the ire of parents in the Atlanta area. So much so, that it has caused area Wal-Mart stores to pull the toy off of its shelves.The problem with this is that these parents have no idea what this figure represents. The 'Al Snow' character, is a character that is supposed to be a troubled soul, who turns to his mannequin head for guidance. The mannequin head offers advice and information that only Al can hear and understand. This advice, in most cases, leads Al to victory in the wrestling ring. The entire situation is simply a part of the show that is the World Wrestling Federation.
Many of the parents who are and will be buying their children WWF toys for Christmas this year have probably never watched wrestling, and if they have, they wouldn't admit it. Being a parent myself, I know that most people my age were children during a time when it wasn't 'hip' to be a wrestling fan. Anyone who was a fan was made fun of for watching something that was obviously more show than sport. These are the same people that get emotional over daytime dramas, even though there are no cities where the entire population is wealthy and everyone is sleeping with everyone else.
What these parents need to do before buying this or any other toy for their children, for Christmas or any other time, is research the product. Yes, that means watching a little wrestling with your child, and finding out what the characters that they are so in love with stand for. Parents need to also understand that professional wrestling is an elaborate, athletic, stage performance, and none of the performers are who they appear to be on television. Just like Patrick Swayze isn't really a ghost, and Whoopi Goldberg really isn't a crooked psychic. If professional wrestling is so deranged, then why are you letting your child watch it in the first place?
The only thing that all of this publicity over the Al snow action figure has done is made the version that comes with 'Head' a collector's item, because there won't be very many on the shelves, and they won't be there for very long.
I recently read that World Championship Wrestling was considering instituting a Hardcore title. What's worse is that Norman Smiley is being considered as the initial title-holder. This brings to mind the complete title of this article: "Hardcore Titles: Just Like Opinions, Everyone Has One, And Most Are Useless!"Nothing Against Norman Smiley, even though his character is softer than what is necessary for a Hardcore Champion (But so is Bob Holly). The problem is, with nearly every match being contested under no disqualification, fall count anywhere, anything goes rules, how does one tell the difference between a regular match and a hardcore match?
Mick Foley and the Rock traded the WWF World Title back and forth, while competing in matches in empty arenas, last man standing matches, falls count anywhere matches, and other extremely violent affairs. Every Steve Austin match ends up on the floor and in the stands at some point. The WWF is contesting their title matches with multiple combatants (see 1999 Survivor Series). Every match becomes a festival of weapons and blood. What could be more hardcore than that?
Extreme Championship Wrestling makes no bones about the fact that they are extreme. Every match features someone being put through a table, and steel chairs being used. These are the rules, not the exception. The other federations would like to feature a more hardcore style, but have no idea how to go about it, which is why many former ECW stars are being courted by the big two. These athletes are being brought on board, not for their talents, but for their ability to instruct the other wrestlers in the finer points of hardcore. So why waste it during a "wrestling" match?
If a Hardcore title is being contested, then have a hardcore match. If a regular title is being fought for, let's keep the tables and chairs out of the matches. Unless the match is being fought in ECW, where violence is the standard and the competitors know and accept this. If a wrestler wants to be hardcore all the time, change federations.
The career of Fatu has traveled down some very strange roads. He began wrestling as a Samoan Savage, teaming with Samu, the nephew of one of the Original Wild Samoans. Whether the team was referred to as The Samoan Swat Team, The Headshrinkers, or The Samoan Mafia, the composition of the team was always Samu, Fatu, or the Samoan Savage, formerly The Tonga Kid. These men were rough, vicious, and gave teams like The Steiners, The Nasty Boys, and The Freebirds, some of the toughest matches they had ever been in.Once the World Wrestling Federation felt that the Samoans had outlasted their usefulness to the organization, the team was disbanded, but Fatu's services were retained. He has since been cast in many different roles, ranging from a Middle Eastern warrior managed by Bob Backlund & the Iron Sheik, to his current character, a Sumo wrestler.
When the character was first introduced, he was view, by this reporter, as filling the space that would have been occupied by Yokozuna, the former WWF Champion whose weight problem keeps him from being a useful performer. Since many characters are based on other characters, this was not seen as much of a problem. He would devastate some jobbers, engage in a few meaningless feuds, and never come close to WWF gold. This all changed when he was placed into a story line with Scott Taylor & Brian Christopher.
Brian Christopher, the son of Jerry "The King" Lawler, and his partner Scott Taylor, are the WWF's equivalent of Lenny & Lodi. Two talented wrestlers around whom no story lines seem to fit quite right. The only thing they know for sure is the fact that neither of them are very good dancers, so the WWF keeps incorporating this into the angles of Christopher & Taylor. Somehow, the WWF writers feel that it is a good idea to have "Too Cool", or whatever they are calling their team these days, be protected by Fatu, and to have him join them in a synchronized dance after the match. Therein lies the problem.
Kane don't dance. The Undertaker don't dance, Goldberg don't dance. Yokozuna never danced. No wrestler, whose character is based on intimidation, dances. This just serves to make Fatu into another clown in the World Wrestling Federation circus. Fatu, I hope that you and the Blue Meanie have lots to talk about in mid-card land, because this angle is not going to boost your career. Maybe once this story line in over, you too can go to WCW and complain about how the WWF tried to ruin your career, but that angle has already been done too.
For those of us old enough to remember, the title of this article was taken from a song by Ray Parker, Jr. in the early 1980's. The song was expressing his feelings regarding his current relationship, but these words could easily describe Brad Armstrong's relationship with World Championship Wrestling.Brad Armstrong is a second-generation wrestler. He and his three wrestling brothers are the sons of "Bullet" Bob Armstrong, one of the toughest wrestlers in the Southwest areas during the seventies. Brad first began his rise to prominence as a member of The Lightning Express with his partner Tim Horner. Brad is also held the WCW Light Heavyweight title on two occasions. This title was the predecessor to the current Cruiserweight title. Brad defeated Jushin Liger, and the late Brian Pillman for the title. At the time, he was considered one of the greatest light heavyweights in the sport.
Brad has also been a frequent visitor to story line hell. In his career he has been "The Candy Man", a wrestler who wears striped tights and gives candy to the fans, and a hip-hop wrestler, using the name "B. A." and teaming himself with Master P. his bodyguards, and Rey Mysterio, Jr. In between were two stints under a mask; first as "Badstreet" a masked member of The Freebirds, teaming with Michael Hayes & Jimmy Garvin. The other time was, as "Arachnaman", a really poor imitation of Spider Man. Brad's unmistakable wrestling style, however, could not be hidden.
Brad is now parading around as "Buzzkill", a 1960's love child, complete with tie-dyed clothing, and a "Make Love, Not War" sign. This angle didn't work for Van Hammer, and will not work for Brad Armstrong. Brad is one of those rare individuals who, like Dean Malenko, Chris Adams, Steven Regal, and the late Owen Hart, is a veteran of more than 10 years in the sport, but a relatively young man, having debuted at a very early age. He is a talented individual who can wrestle, brawl, and generate offense from the top rope when necessary, but WCW hasn't been able to figure out how to use him. He is too small for the Goldberg/Nash/Sid/Sting set, he is too experienced for the Revolution/Filthy Animals set, but he is too experienced, and too big (even at 220 pounds, within the Cruiserweight division weight limit) for the cruiserweights, who all weight less than 200 pounds. There is no place for Brad Armstrong.
Brad would never fit in with the WWF, so my suggestion is that he venture to ECW, where, like Jerry Lynn, he will be given a chance to succeed solely because of his physical gifts, and not because of some cheesy character. My message to World Championship Wrestling: If you're not sure that you have a role for Brad Armstrong, LET HIM GO!
I know that based on the title of this piece, most casual wrestling fans are saying, "Who is Mike Jones?" Well, Mike Jones began his wrestling career as, well Mike Jones. He then became Mr. USA Mike Jones, then Rocky Jones. I don't have a problem with an African-American wrestler paying tribute to other African-American wrestlers, but when he became Soul Train Jones, that bothered me.The point of this piece was not to talk about Mr. Jones' older characters, but instead his more recent ones. Mike came to the WWF in 1987 or 1888 as an associate to Ted DiBiase (have you figured it out yet?). The federation powers felt that it would be humorous to name his character "Virgil". This was done as an insult to Virgil Riley Runnels, better known to the world as Dusty Rhodes. Virgil was a modern day butler or manservant to DiBiase and if this was supposed to anger Rhodes, he didn't show it when he accepted Vice McMahon's money and joined the World Wrestling Federation.
When Mike had outlasted his usefulness with the WWF, he joined WCW, again as an associate of DiBiase's with the New World Order. He chose the name Vincent as an insult to Vince McMahon, similar to when Mike Rotundo became V.K. Wallstreet. Mike maintained this character until the New World Order disbanded. After the demise of the New World Order, Mike changed his character once again. No, I'm not talking about the Curly Bill fiasco, but I am referring to his current guise as "Shane". Obviously, this is another attack on the McMahon family.
My advice for Mike Jones is this: if you are being placed into these characters, then take control of your career before it is too late. If you are creating these characters yourself, then it may already be too late. If you were to leave WCW, you could NEVER go back to the WWF, and you wouldn't last fifteen minutes in ECW. You are essentially stuck in WCW until they tire of you, after which, you will be forced to make the senior circuit currently occupied by King Kong Bundy & Greg Valentine. Just make sure that you don't decide to call yourself "Paul", because if you were signed by ECW, it would be the worst time of your life, and you may not survive the experience.
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