You didn't think Barbra Streisand would actually stoop to the level of scalawags beneath her (meaning the entire nation)? As Newsmax.com reports, a day after left-wing loony Barbra decided to go public with recommendations on how to solve California's energy crisis, a representative said she didn't intend to follow her own advice.
"She never meant that it necessarily applied to her," explained Streisand's spokesman to the New York Times Wednesday.
Can't you just see Babs recoiling in repulsion at the idea that her satin sheets might be flapping in the wind? Egad, does this mean that the rose petals in her toilet might not be the freshest picks of the day? I'm sure a quick call to good pal Rosie will clear all of this up, and their armed bodyguards (guns are just bad for us troglodytes) should make sure that the power stays on in Streisand's palace.
I don't know why my Braves traded John Rocker to Cleveland, and I don't care. But I am very happy to see him go. His attitude and mood-swings were tiresome and his control was so suspect that every time he walked on the mound I fully expected him to spontaneously combust. Or at least give up three runs and lose the game. Same thing.
I present the newest media phenomenon, the angry black female, Washington Post writer Natalie Hopkinson: "We damn sure are not about to allow white folks to buy up all the property in D.C."
Miss Hopkinson is referring to her decision to buy a new home in the inner-city, where she worries that Caucasians will buy all the homes, spruce up the neighborhood and drive up property values, thus forcing poorer blacks into other areas of town.
But can you imagine if a white writer in the Post had written, "We damn sure are not going to allow black folks to buy up all the property"? The uproar would be deafening, with Jesse Jackson shaking down all sorts of white people for "contributions" to his organizations after threatening them with the "racist" tag.
In another manner, though, I see the writer's misspoken point. She would like middle-class blacks to remain in town and attempt to clean up poor neighborhoods rather than flee to white areas, ignoring the plight of those left behind. It's noble, but Natalie should have been more careful with her words, instead of giving conservative talk radio some great talking points.
On this day in 1906 the first French Grand Prix took place. Tragically, though, the Renault line was even less effective than the Maginot line when it came time to fight W.W.I.
Also on this day, in 1947, the first Transatlantic car-phone call took place, when U.S. Ambassador James Clement Dunn, in Milan, Italy, called the president of the New York City Council. It is unknown if, distracted, they ran off the road.
But if they made that call today, the NYC president would be fined up to $100. Last night the New York state legislature made it illegal to use hand-held phones while driving. The NY Senate is going to concur, and Governor Pataki is expected to sign the bill.
Washington Post correction from Monday: "A June 24 article contained a missing word that reversed the meaning of a quotation from White House senior adviser Karl Rove. The quotation should have read that President Bush "does not want polling done to test ideas before he has decided on them." Rove said the Bush White House uses polling to help sell Bush's ideas, not to make policy."
Boy, what a lot of trouble the word "not" can be, eh? Sounds as if the Post was hoping to hear something that wasn't said. How quickly they forget that Clinton no longer lives in the White House.
Speaking of making fun of the French (I wasn't? Then I'm going to), President Bush made strides in describing his missile defense plan to skeptical European leaders, except for Germany and France, which is strange since the French duck for cover when you hand them a sauerkraut, let alone fire a warhead at them.
Even so, the lefty leftist French newspaper Liberation was moved to say that Bush "is manifestly not the 'superficial buffoon and arrogant Texan' portrayed in the media."
What do ya know? Even the silly French are able to look past false representations of the president than our own media, which is mostly responsible for creating the insulting image in the first place.
Silly Spin of the Week:
"Landfills are house magnets. Build a landfill and the houses will come." - Engineer Murray Griffin assuring residents a proposed landfill in Atlanta won' hurt their property values.
Political correctness has now reached the depths of the sea.
The Committee of Names of Fishes of the American Fisheries Society wants to ban the use of the term Jewish, instead calling it a "goliath grouper."
If Jacques Cousteau called a Jew a goliath grouper I can see why someone would be offended. But I wouldn't get upset if there was a ChristianHog or Caucasionosaur.
For Rabbi Bruce Diamond of Temple Beth-El, the name change is a cockamamie idea.
"Jewfish is out?" Diamond said. "I tell you: In the universe of things that need to change, the name of a big grouper is low on the list. I appreciate their political correctness, but people should think about getting migrant laborers a few more pennies for their tomatoes, do something good for the world. And you got that from the rabbi's mouth."
A man seeking gratification in the red-light district in the German town of Aachen was surprised to run into his wife, who was secretly working as a prostitute, police said on Monday. Prostitution is not illegal in Germany but police were required to calm an argument between the couple that broke out after the chance encounter in the small hours of Saturday morning." (Reuters)
You think he was more upset that she was a prostitute or she was more upset that he would go to one?
Why does 'monosyllabic' have so many syllables?
Another lefty loony (and worse, this one actually has a seat in the Senate), Barbara Boxer, an avid Bush critic, has some 'splainin to do. The LA Times reports that Boxer "pocketed tens of thousands of dollars" in "quick profits on active trading of energy stocks last year."
While complaining about Bush's energy policy, records show the California Democrat engaged in a flurry of highly profitable energy trades throughout last year, cashing in big time with investments in Duke Energy Corp., Diamond Offshore Drilling Inc. and El Paso Energy Corp., as well as Halliburton - while her state's electric rates and gasoline prices went through the roof.
"She bought shares in energy companies in at least 66 transactions, and by the end of the year held stakes whose combined worth was estimated at between $126,000 and $355,000," the Times said.
Another oily Bush-bashing pol turns out to be the state's richest congressional representative, Rep. Jane Harman, who had the nerve to co-sponsor a bill against energy price gouging while racking up gains on her $350,000 investment in the Houston-based energy firm Enron. Complying Thursday with Congress' financial disclosure rules, Harman reported total assets of between $107 and $297 million.
Wondering where the outrage is over efforts by the Earth Liberation Front, an extremist environmental group, that is blamed for costly arson attacks across the country. The FBI has stepped up efforts to punish companies and institutions it says are threatening the environment.
The ELF has even posted a manual on its Web site that tells would-be arsonists how to build simple incendiary devices. The group claimed responsibility for the latest of four years worth of terrorism, fires at the University of Washington and a tree farm in Oregon in April. Several hours earlier, three logging trucks were torched in an Oregon forest.
Why aren't liberals speaking out against such criminal minds? Because the ELF's heart is in the right place, and those big corporations probably had it coming to them.
This week's best Vents from the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:
- The way Hollywood keeps making computer games into movies, I can't wait for my favorite: Solitaire.
- Bush favors Vermont as the new bombing practice area.
- Are we supposed to take advice on national defense from the French?
- During a meeting the other day, I had this incredible urge to check my e-mail and get online. But, I didn't have my computer and I began to panic. I felt like a Borg unable to communicate with the collective. Is this the first step towards assimilation?
- My buddy from California says even when the lights are on the people are still in the dark
- Brokers are finally living up to their name.
- The Navy has to give up bombing Vieques and is looking for another suitable spot where it can conduct "live fire" exercises on land and beaches for the Marines to assault. How about Cuba?
- Every proposal the Democrats ever make involves someone receiving a financial benefit by some means other than earning it.
Homer quote: "You know Moe, my mom once said something that really stuck with me. She said, `Homer, you´re a big disappointment´, and God bless her soul, she was really onto something." Bart's chalkboard: "I will not re-transmit without the express permission of Major League Baseball." Random site: worstjob.com - Because yours is a cakewalk in comparison.
What kind of world do we live in where monsters aren't even safe anymore?