Boot: Welcome everyone to UCW Fury. This is Prez Boot and sitting here next to me is the Jedi Knight himself, Luke Skywalker.
Luke: My name is Mark Hamill!
B: Sure Luke, I got a question for you. Why is it that in Star Wars Obi-Wan says when he met your father he was a great pilot, but in Phantom Menace he is only a little kid, whats up with that?
Luke: Leave me alone!
B: And Luke, why is it that in Empire Strikes back, Obi-Wan says Yoda is the Jedi who trained him, but in Phantom Menace it was Qui-Jon who was training him?
Luke: I don't know! Stop asking me these things! George wrote the script over one weekend, how am I supoosed to know what the hell he was thinking?
B: Oh sorry Luke. I'll knock it off
Luke: Finally, some peace, now our next match I am told ...
B: Why is it that in Empire when Han was lowered into the carbonite chamber his hands were tied behind his back, but after the freezing was done his hands were free and held in front of him?
Luke: *waves hand in Boot's face* This conversation is over.
B: This conversation is over.
Luke: *waves hand* It is now time for our next match.
B: It is now time for our next match.
Luke: Now this mext match is for the UCW Internet Title and will be defended in triple threat rules. Meaning either one of these men can be pinned and will be the Internet Champion, this does not set well for the UCW Internet champion Shadow.
B: Here comes our first combatant, coming out to a huge flame of pyro, here is a former UCW Tag Team Champion, Pyromaniac.
Luke: Now coming out is one half of UCW's current tag team champions the Black Label Society, here is the Crazed Killer.
B: And now, our current Internet champion and former tag team champion with none other than one of his opponents tonight the Crazed Killer, coming out with his valet Lilith, here is Shadow.
Luke: Some cold stares being exchanged from Crazed Killer and Shadow.
B: Cold like the planet Hoth?
Luke: Why didn't I see that coming? But now the match is starting. Shadow and CK are still sanding face to face.
B: Look at Pyromaniac. He is yelling at these two to get started. He is trying to instigate a fight between these two former partners who are standing face to face. Although it was never seen on TV, the break up of these teo must have caused some friction when CK left Shadow to team with the American Psycho.
Luke: Hey! CK and Shadown both just nailed Pyro! There is no bad blood between these two, it was all a ruse to get Pyro into a false sense of security.
B: Like when Leia went undercover to try rescue Han Solo from the clutches of Jabba the Hut? And you pretended to hand over C3PO and R2D2 to Jabba, when really R2D2 had your light saber? And when you pretended to be captured and ...
Luke: Boot, focus on the match. CK and Shadow are doing a double team on Pyro, Shadow with an Irish whip, and Ck catches with a powerslam.
B: Ck hold onto the legs of Pyro, and Shadow is climbing the ropes. What is going to happen?
CK: Whaaaaaaaaaassssssssuuuuuuuuuuuupppppppppp!
B: Shadow with a diving headbutt to the groin of Pyromaniac. That has got to hurt.
Luke: Ck with a cover ... 1 ... 2 ... no, Shadow stops the count. Now Shadow with a cover, 1 ... 2 ... and CK stops it. I'm noticing a trend here.
B: They are argueing with who gets the win and who gets to be Internet Champion. You should know this sort of thing was bound to happen.
Luke: From behind, school boy by Pyro on CK, 1 ... 2 ... but the count stopped by Shadow, real opportunistic that Pyro is. A one in a million chance.
B: You mean like when you and Rogue Squadron were trying to destroy the Death Star?
Luke: Yes! I mean no! I mean ... look at Shadown and Pyro punching each other, usually these two are more scientific, but not for this match.
B: Ck goes to the outside and gets chair, he is back in the ring and nails Pyromaniac in the back with that chair laying him out.
Luke: Ck and Shadow discuss it with each other, and it looks like they are coming to an understanding now. Shadow is picking up Pyro and is setting him up for the Death's Descent. I guess Shadow is going to stay the Internet champion.
B: No! Ck nails Shadow in the head with that chair, I guess what ever relationship these two had is over now. Shadow is knoed out and CK throws him to the outside.
Luke: Lilith runs to Shadows aid, while in the ring CK picks up Pyro. He sets him up for a Last Ride Powerbomb, and connects with it. CK covers ... 1 ... 2 ... 3! Crazed Killer is the new Internet Champion, and he did it without having to pin the champion.
B: Lilith is in the ring, and she is yelling at the Crazed Killer. Crazed Killer grabs her by the hair and he is going to nail her.
Luke: Here comes Shadow, he attacks Ck stopping him from hurting Lilith. He knocks CK to the ground and then he turns to tend to Lilith to see if she is alright.
B: Low blow from behind to Shadow, Shadow doubles over, and CK picks him up and brings him to the corner. CK picks Shadow up, and there is the Final Breath on Shadow. Shadow has got to be hurt. What actions by the Crazed Killer! We'll be right back, and I have a match to prepare for.
Luke: Finally, some quiet now that Boot is gone. This upcoming match was a whle coming. This Darien guy has been complaining to Boot and making remarks to him ever since he joined UCW, now it is time for him to see how he can do against the veteren Boot. I am joined here by another special guest commentator ... the man, the myth, the legend, Rob Grayson!
Rob: Yeah! I'd like to thank Mama, and Jesus, for helping us get here today. This should be a great match!
Luke: I notice you are not in your regular Superhero costume, but is in a Boot T-shirt, amd cap, and foam finger.
Rob: Me and Boot go way back. We've teamed up every where, dating as far back to the original UCW, which this fed is named after in tribute of a dam god fed. I support Boot all the way! Yeah!
Luke: There we go folks, a true blue fan to the end, even in loss.
Rob: Boot lost? That stupid piece of crap! *throws cap to the ground*
Luke: No, the match hasn't happened yet.
Rob: Oh ... go Boot! Whooooo!
Luke: Here comes our first wrestler, bring a table down to the ring, the big man, Darien.
Rob: I've beaten bigger guys like that in my day. I remember this one guy buy the name of Arcane in the ICW ...
Luke: Rob please, now is not the time. Here comes the UCW President. His music starts on the PA.
PA: What do you want to do with your life?
Fans: WE WANT TO ROCK!
Rob: Here he is, coming out to "Were Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister, the winner of suck classic battle with the likes of Dark Saint, Krayzie, the Mad Maple and countless others, here is Boot.
Luke: Darien is setting up the table in the corner of the ring, Boot climbs on the ring apron and steps over the tops rope, Darien turns around ... Spear by Boot throught the table! This match is over already! This has to be some sort of record or something.
Rob: Nah, I remember this one guy by the name of Johnny Sweet, that guy would end up on his back quicker than Stephaine MacMahon on a date. And don't even get me started on my battles with RJ Souza ...
Luke: Either way, Boot is victorious. I guess Darien has finally been shut up. We'll be right back with our world title match up.