FAIRBANKS: Next up tongith, ladies and gentlemen, we have a inter-gender match.

CREED: What?

F: A match between a man and a woman.

C: The Gay Bandit isn't the man is he?

F: No.

C: He isn't the woman then?

F: The Gay Bandit isn't in this match. He wrestled earlier, so stop your pining.

C: Good for a second I thought,,,,HEY, what do you mean pining?

F: Oops, I meant whining.

C: I bet. So who is in this match anyway?

F: Tonight's contest pits Anarchy, victorious in his first match here in UCW, against newcomer Faith.

C: WHAT??!! You mean some broad is going to get in the ring with that monster?

F: Yes, I mean a lady is getting into the ring with the three hundred pound plus man known as Anarchy and here she

comes now.

C: Wow, she's pretty hot. I hope Anarchy don't mess-up her face too much, I just may have to give her mouth to mouth.

F: Wouldn't that be hard to do with a broken jaw?

C: I don't have a broken jaw.

F: You would if you tried to give her mouth to mouth.

C: She digs me, I can tell.

F: What ever. And now here comes Anarchy. This is one huge man folks.

C: You know what they say, "The bigger they are the faster I run."

F: What bearing does that have on tonight's match?

C: None what so ever, I just had to say it for some reason.

F: Please do everyone a favor and limit your commits to what is happening in the ring. Anarchy is in the ring while

Faith is pacing around the outside of the ring.

C: She's trying to decide whether to get in the ring or come over here and sit on my lap.

F: That will probably never happen but the Gay Bandit on the other hand.

C: Shut up, shut up, Faith is bending over and stretching.

F: One of these days Creed someone is going to put you in your place.

C: Maybe, but it won't be you.

F: Dumbass.

C: Crap for brains.

F: Now that we have that out of the way, can we get on to the business of calling the match?

C: Ok, shall I?

F: Be my guest.

C: Faith jumps onto the apron and climbs through the ropes. Mario, the referee for this match calls for the bell.

F: Anarchy is standing in the middle of the ring watching Faith as she circles around him.

C: What's she up to?

F: I'm not sure but I think we are about to find out because it looks as if Faith has made up her mind about something. She walks up to Anarchy and stands there looking at him. Anarchy is just standing there with a smirk on his face.

C: My God, Faith has just jumped up and wrapped her arms around Anarchy's neck and now she's kissing him. Do you think she's trying to choke him out with her tongue?

F: It'd be a clever ploy if she was but I think she's just trying some kind of psychological warfare on him.

C: Wish she'd try some on me.

F: Mario steps in to pull her off Anarchy. Now she starts to kiss Mario.

C: Lucky guy, HEY, what's Snake doing out here and why does he have the Hardcore belt with him.

{Snake rolls into the ring and comes up behind Anarchy who is standing there watching Faith and the ref make-out. Taking the Hardcore belt he hits Anarchy in the back of the head with it knocking him out. Snake then climbs to the top turn-buckle and hits Anarchy with the snake pit then rolls back out of the ring and runs back up the ramp.}

C: Why did he do that?

F: I don't know, and with the ref distracted with Faith he didn't see a thing.

C: You don't think she and Snake are an item do you?

F: I think she has better sense than that. Faith has broken her clinch with Mario and seeing Anarchy lying on the mat she runs and springs off the ropes executing a springboard moonsault onto Anarchy, she covers and the ref comes in for the count,1,2,3, and Faith is the winner.

C: Anarchy is gonna be pissed when he wakes up.

{Suddenly the lights go out, then,,,}

C: MY GOD THE RING IS ON FIRE,THE RING IS ON FIRE!!!

[the lights come back on.}

F: Look,Firestarter is in the ring and he has Faith by the throat.

C: Now Anarchy is getting up and he does look pissed. This doesn't look good for Faith.

F: Anarchy goes over to where Firestarter is holding Faith and together they double chokeslam her. Anarchy then picks up Faith and powerbombs her hard into the mat. Firestarter bounces off the ropes and drops a leg on her throat. Anarchy picks her up again and throws her over the top rope and to the floor.

C: Look, Anarchy and Firestarter are staring at each other, are THEY going to get into it now.

F: No, they're shaking hands. It appears that these two men are now a team.

C: That could be trouble for a lot of people in UCW.

F: That it could. We'll be right back.

{Anarchy and Firestarter roll out of the ring and head up the ramp together as the EMTs rush down to attend to Faith.}

Fairbanks: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to our next matchup between two guys who have shown they have what it takes to get to the top of UCW.

Creed: Have you lost your mind? They haven't proven anything.

F: Joey Love holds victories over Jack Heart and Kamchantaberry Ambergree even though he doesn't count them as wins. The man has proven his ability.

C: Do you even remember those matches? I think you are going senile on me. At least Lomatta has shown some backbone. He took out two guys in that very ring with a sledgehammer. I've gotta go with a man that knows how to hurt people.

F: Joey Love is making his way to ring and for some reason he is smiling.

C: He probably heard that Lomatta wasn't going to be here tonight. He's probably counting on another cheap victory.

F: Creed, will you lay off the guy?

C: I won't have to. Look coming down the aisle behind him. Lomatta is here and he's brought his sledgehammer.

F: Love must sense something is wrong because he is turning around and MY GOD, Lomatta just leveled him with a sledgehammer shot to the ribs. There is no way he can wrestle now. Lomatta should be suspended.

C: The match hasn't started yet. You can't fault the man for wanting to get an edge.

F: An edge? He may have just crippled Love. Lomatta is heading for the ring. He demands the referee ring the bell and start the match.

C: I think Lomatta is going to win this one.

F: The referee starts counting. Love is moving. He is actually crawling toward the ring. I can't believe this.

C: There is no way he can make it in time and even if he does, there is no way that he can wrestle in that condition.

F: The referee is at six and Love has grabbed the bottom rope and is trying to pull himself in the ring. 7..8..9.. He's done it. Love has made it in the ring before the ten count.

C: Yeah, but he is still holding those ribs. I'll bet some are broken. Look at Lomatta go. He kicks Love in the ribs. The referee is trying to pull him off.

F: This man has no business in wrestling. That was just uncalled for. The referee sends Lomatta to the corner and checks on Joey Love. I don't see how he can continue.

C: The referee must agree because it looks like he is going to call for the bell. Wait, Love stopped him. This man must not have any sense at all. He'll be dead before this match is over.

F: Lomatta comes back over and picks love up. He locks in a bearhug. Love is screaming out in pain.

C: Finally Lomatta is going to put him away.

F: Even through the pain, Love has enough in him to box Lomatta's ears. That breaks the hold and Love collapses back on the mat. Lomatta bends over to pick him up once again and Love gets him in a small package. 1..2..Lomatta kicks out.

C: I have no idea why Love is still in this match. Lomatta is angry about the pin attempt though. He picks up Love and whips him into the ropes. A knee to the ribs by Lomatta, followed by an elbow drop. Lomatta goes for the pin. 1..2.. Love puts his foot on the ropes.

F: Love is really showing us what he is made of tonight. Lomatta picks him back up and another whip into the ropes. Love comes off with a flying clothesline and both men are down. The referee is starting the ten count.

C: Both men are working their way back to their feet. Both start throwing lefts and rights. Love ducks a right by Lomatta and applies the sleeper hold. Lomatta is staggering around. He backs into the turnbuckle but Love doesn't let go.

F: That had to have hurt the ribs. Lomatta drops to one knee. The referee is checking. 1..2.. No, Lomatta holds his hand up. He works his way back to his feet. He turns into Love and delivers a side suplex. Love is holding those ribs once again.

C: Lomatta tosses Love into the corner. He charges and Love ducks out of the way. Lomatta goes hard into the turnbuckle and staggers back. Love hits him with a dropkick. Love bounces back to his feet but he is still favoring those ribs.

F: Love hits a leg drop on Lomatta and goes for the pin. 1..2.. Lomatta powers out. Both men are back to their feet once again. Love bounces off the ropes and ducks a clothesline by Lomatta. He comes back with a crossbody. 1..2.. Lomatta kicks out once again. It looks like Joey Love has gotten his second wind.

C: Don't count Lomatta out yet.

F: Not by a long shot. Lomatta kicks Love in the stomach. He lifts Love up and holds him there in the suplex position. The strength Lomatta possess is just incredible. He is just holding him there.

C: Love's face is getting bright red. He has to be close to passing out. Lomatta must have held him up there for too long because Love has just reversed it and delivers a reverse DDT on Lomatta. Both men are down on the mat.

F: Yes, but Joey's arm is covering Lomatta. The referee drops down. 1..2..3 There it is. Joey Love has done it. He has beaten Jake Lomatta in a very brutal match.

C: The referee is helping Love to his feet and raising his hand in victory. Love doubles over holding his ribs.

F: Let's just hope that they aren't broken because this man is on a roll. I would hate to see him get derailed right now.

C: The man got lucky for a third time. How can you be so stupid?

F: You can't argue with results and Joey Love has provided results so far. And that's all the time we have for this week. We'll see you next time, folks.