In December 1999 I wrote the Very Voyager Christmas List, my list of the things I'd like to see, both in Star Trek and its related end of the 'real' world.  I now revisit that list, looking at the expectations which were met ... and those which weren't.

(The actual list will be in blue, my current comments will be black.)

1. BETTER TIE-IN NOVELS
Who doesn't have this on their list?  Actually the last couple of years have seen improvements, with novels like "Fire Ship" and "Seven of Nine", but they're the exceptions rather than the rules.
Hmm ... Voyager novels in general have been pretty thin on the ground this year, let along good ones.  On the other hand, given some of the travesties we've seen in the past, that might not be a bad thing.

2. MORE SCRIPT BOOKS
I haven't been able to actually sit down and *read* the two script books yet -- they're only for sale in the city at the moment, and none of the local libraries have them -- but I'm trying to save some money for them and I'd like to see more.  We've had a Seven series, now how about a Janeway series?  Or even a Kes series -- unlikely but cool.
A few weeks ago I managed to buy the Q scripts, and I hope to get the Seven scripts soon.  But the comment still stands: more, please!

3. VARIETY IN JANEWAY'S DAY-TO-DAY HAIRSTYLES
Maybe I shouldn't complain - the existing hairstyle is okay.  but in real life, women with hair that length vary it from day to day -- pony-tails, buns, twists, braids, out, etc.  The women on Babylon 5 did it, so why not on Star Trek?
The comment remains valid, although we did see the return of the Bun in "Fair Haven", and "Unimatrix 0" presented us with a whole new look.  To baldly go...

4. LONG HAIR FOR CHAKOTAY AND HARRY
Scout around the Robert Beltran website and you'll find some great pics of him with longer hair.  And remember Harry in "Timeless?"  Gorgeous!  I humbly request that TPTB watch "The Last of the Mohicans" and take copious notes.
{Sigh...} If only.

5. CONTINUITY
It's the major whinge of Voyager fans and critics alike -- even the best stories are marred by continuity failures.  It's annoying, and it reflects laziness on the part of TPTB.
Grrrr...

6. CONSEQUENCES
And another thing ... Brannon Braga's great on cause and effect in the temporal sense (wasn't that a *great* episode?), but the concept sometimes gives him some trouble in the 'real' sense.  I'd like to see character arcs going for a season or more, and actions and events having real consequences.
Still waiting.  But maybe new exec Kenneth Biller will allow the assimilation of Janeway, Tuvok and B'Elanna to have long lasting effects.  Even TNG didn't do that.

7. A VOYAGER FASHION LINE
No, I'm serious.  It'd be really cool if some of the clothes we see on Voyager were available in stores.  Janeway's outfits usually leave something to be desired (like a bonfire), but Kes's little outfits are coming into fashion -- tons of girls are wearing layers and skirts over trousers and stuff.  I don't think I'd want to see Seven's catsuits on the average woman, but I'd love to own that little blue dress she wore in "Someone to Watch Over Me".  Come on; TPTB have consented to themed bottled water, why not this?!?
I still think that it would be cool.  Although given Seven's recent predilection for pink dresses, perhaps it's best that it remain a dream.

8. GUEST APPEARANCES
Specifically, I'd like to see the following people appearing in Voyager:
· Sarah Michelle Gellar (of Buffy)
· David Boreanaz ( of Angel and Buffy)
· Claudia Christian (formerly of Babylon 5.  She auditioned for Seven.  Even though she slags off Voyager (esp. Jeri Ryan -- sour grapes central), she's still cool.
· Bruce Boxleitner (formerly of Babylon 5)
· Mark Harelik (played Kashyk in "Counterpoint".  He wouldn't have to play that character, though)
· Portia Di Rossi (of Ally McBeal) Can't you just see her as the 'real' Arachnia?
And instead we get pro-wrestlers and musicians.  Actually I like Tom Morello, but who really wants to see a former Miss America entrant getting beaten by a pro-wrestler?  (OK, put your hands down...)

9. THE RETURN OF CAPTAIN PROTON
What I'd really like to see would be an episode which isn't exactly Voyager per se, it just stars the regular cast as the Proton characters in a parody of modern day remakes of old sci-fi.  But the 'original' Proton would be cool too -- I'd love to see more of Arachnia, including the holodeck's version of her (I'm thinking special guest star here).  Can you imagine Janeway walking in to be confronted by Seven-ish bombshell Portia Di Rossi?
And instead we get Fair Haven.  {Sob}

10. NAOMI STORIES
I like Naomi a lot, and Scarlett Pomers is the only child actor I've ever liked, so I want to see more of both.  I guess most fans would baulk at an episode all about Naomi, wouldn't they?  Not a kid's episode, but a serious exploration of the kind of lonely childhood she seems to have.
Still a possibility, but it would probably have to involve Seven skinny dipping or something.

11. NAOMI GROWN UP (TIME TRAVEL!!)
I don't want Naomi to continue her fast growth -- I really like Scarlett -- but I'd love to see her as an adult in a time travel story.  Like maybe Voyager could be assimilated and Naomi's thrown into a maturation chamber, so she becomes a twenty year old in a matter of weeks.  The original assimilation of Voyager wasn't completely successful, so she's sent back in a sphere to try again (hindsight being twenty-twenty).  But Janeway defeats them and separates Naomi, and Seven and Naomi herself have to rehabilitate her.  If there was a Borg doohicky which could ... um ... separate her from the space-time continuum (I love that term), then they wouldn't even have to reset.  They could just keep going with two Naomis.

I think it's time I had a lie down.
The Borg idea seems unlikely in light of "Unimatrix 0", but I guess there's always fanfic.  And I'd still like to see Naomi grown up.

12. MORE HUMOUR
Voyager does humour well (much better than TNG, IMHO) and I want to see more actual comedy episodes in the vein of "Message in a Bottle" and "Someone to Watch Over Me", where they characters are funny in and of themselves, rather than because of who they're pretending to be.  I'd especially like to see Janeway being funny -- I've heard that Mulgrew is fantastic in a sitcom.  She once said that she asked for an episode where she has to beat the aliens using words -- telling jokes, funny stories, just killing them with laughter.  I'm a trifle doubtful about that idea, but I really want to see a woman being funny.  [RANT ON] I've noticed that women aren't expected to be funny, and that funny women [a] are viewed with suspicion and [b] don't hold authority.  You look at sitcoms, you'll see that most female characters are either straight [wo]men or too ditzy to hold authority.  Guys can be funny, but girls should be serious.  When our school captains had to give end of year speeches, the girls gave prissy speeches about friendship and studying, while the guys had us in stitches.  So I'd like to see Janeway play the comedienne for once. [RANT OFF]
The suggested Janeway episode turned up in spoilers, but it turned out to be a decoy to throw the rumour-mongers off.  Bastards!  I'd much rather watch that than "Sprit Folk"!  And the thoughts about female commediennes still stand.

13. THE RELEASE OF THE DC WILDSTORM COMICS IN AUSTRALIA
This'll probably happen eventually, but I expect that they'll be just as hard to find as the Marvel comics.
Still waiting...

14. "WRITTEN BY NEIL GAIMAN"
Neil Gaiman is a comic writer who's also done a couple of novels and episodes of Babylon 5.  His writing is very reminiscent of early Brannon Braga, so I'd love to see what they could concoct together.

On the other hand, it'd probably involve Seven of Nine and pole dancing, so maybe I should be careful what I wish for.
This would still be cool, but it's probably just a fantasy.

15. SPECIES 8472
Remember in "In the Flesh", 'Valerie' took a DNA sample from Chakotay?  It was never referred to again, and I'd really love to know what happened to it.
Possible but unlikely.

16. RETURNS OF KES AND SESKA
Two of my favourite characters, and both disappeared without a trace.  Wouldn't it be cool to find out what Tom and Tuvok did with the holoprogram from "Worst Case Scenario"?  I'd love to see Seven take on Seska.  And a guest appearance by Kes would be Just Plain Cool, although Jennifer Lien doesn't expect to be asked back.
{Sob!}  I wish they'd never remembered that Kes existed!  They ruined her character!  And now it's officially in canon!

I still think that Seska would be fun, though.

17. "TREKKIES" RELEASED IN AUSTRALIA
I've heard that it's being released on video in December, but no one at Video Ezy knows anything about it.
Still waiting...

18. Q
I read today that Brannon Braga's thinking of his return, possibly in a more villainous role than before.  Personally, I don't care, I just want John De Lancie to go back to what he's good at -- acting -- and away from writing.  Forever.
The rumours of an imminent return still pop up every now and then, but it seems unlikely that TPTB could come up with a new story for him.

19. THE RELEASE OF "MEN CRY BULLETS" AND "THE LAST MAN" IN AUSTRALIA
I've heard great things about Jeri's performances in both, so I'm itching to see 'em.  I haven't heard anything about their Australian release, but I presume that they'll turn up at the Dendy or in a video store some time in the next six months.
Still waiting...

20. MORE HARRY & CHAKOTAY
Of all the characters, they're the least used (well, there was Kes, but she's not exactly an issue any more).  I wanna see Harry promoted.  I wanna see Chakotay on a date with a woman who is what she appears to be, and who will let the relationship go somewhere.  Or Seven -- they'd be a cute couple, don't you think?  I'd love to see Seven on a vision quest. And I want to give Chakotay a chance to play captain and do a good job.
Apart from the bit about Seven and Chakotay (I like EMH/7), these comments still stand.  PROMOTE HARRY FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LET CHAKOTAY BE A HERO AND NOT LOOK LIKE A CHUMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JUST GIVE THEM SOME SCREEN TIME, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

{Cough} ... Sorry about that.  Time to go take my medication.

Overall, I was a bit disappointed with the way season 6 turned out.  Obviously most of my suggestions were wishful thinking, but even the serious requests were ignored.  (I'm starting to suspect that lack of time might not be the only reason Brannon hasn't signed my guestbook yet ... kidding.  Really.)  As far as I'm concerned, "Fair Haven", "Spirit Folk" and "Fury" didn't actually happen, they were just mass hallucinations.  The aliens messing with our minds.  Fanfics that got too big for their boots.  But the requests for continuity, consequence, character development and David Boreanaz ... they were real.

Comments, thoughts, David Boreanaz -- elizabeth_barr@go.com

Copyright © 1999 - 2000 Elizabeth M Barr

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