Time is a malleable, amorphous thing. Every once in a while, rips in the space-time continuum allow fleeting glimpses at the utopian future, or the Moon-men who built Stonehenge. Sometimes these brief moments revelation are enlightening, often they are bitterly, bitterly misleading (like the clairvoyant geniuses who predicted the towering success of New coke). Our sources have traced an actual news broadcast...FROM THE FUTURE. Most of the information will remain confidential (mmm... insider trading...), but the parts having special significance to this site can, finally, be shared with the Great Unwashed. Now, for the first time in HTML: Burrito and Diablo news... FROM THE FUTURE!
[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]....................... THE NEWS FOR MARCH 3, 2002: The former state "Florida", now known as The Independent Nation of Disney, has offered a warning... [[[SNIP!]]] ...The Flying Burrito and Taco Diablo were relieved of their positions as Swiss Guards for Vatican City today. Reports from the Catholic Church say that the Flying Burrito and Taco Diablo kept assaulting John Paul II with folding chairs since they were led to believe that "Pope" was a title that could be wrestled for. Luckily, Pope John Paul II had brass knuckles under his papal miter to thwart the masked wrestlers' attacks. Elvis is still alive and performing at the 7-11 on Route 10 in Kentucky. Thursday nights only... [[[SNIP!]]] The national anthem was changed recently from the Star Spangled Banner to Rick James' "Superfreak", then to MC Hammer's "You Can't touch This", back to "Superfreak", then finally to the 14 minute version of In-a Gadda Da-vida. THIS JUST IN....................... Pope John Paul II is the new HOH Hardcore champion, and the title of "Pope" can now be wrestled for. THIS JUST IN AS WELL....................... The Flying Burrito and Taco Diablo have both now become Pope. Shouts of "I'm the Pope" have been heard as these two masked wrestlers battle their way through Vatican City. [END TRANSMISSION].......................